The Next Circle of Hell, Vol. 2

Hey guys, long time lurker here. I've written 2 books in a YA Fantasy trilogy so far (and 1 more in a new trilogy, but I digress). The first got rejected by just about everybody, so I self-published it. It's sold almost 3,000 copies so far with no marketing budget whatsoever, but I'd still like to get traditionally published. I'm querying for the second book now and have gotten about 30 rejections so far and have about 30 queries out there. Also, 1 agent - Bob Thixton at Pinder Lane - has asked for my first 3 chapters after reading my query letter.

Anyway, enough back-story. I was wondering if anyone on here would be so kind as to read my query letter and give me some feedback. I know rejection is always part of the game, I just want to make sure it's as good as possible. I suppose I should mention that I've paid a professional editor to write my query letter, 1 and 3 page synosis, and edit my books. And by the way - good to meet you all!

Hey all I haven't forgotten you all. Just a combo of no writing news and the tediousness of left-handed typing. It doesn't look like I'll need surgery on my broken wrist. After a month in a big red cast, yesterday they put me in a sleeker, hot-pink number. Had my first physical therapy session this morning (just the newly freed fingers and elbow). In two weeks the cast will come off assuming everything continues to go well.

I'm supposed to do all these finger exercises every hour or two. Who knows? Maybe this time next week I'll be able to get back to revisions. (Left-hand) fingers crossed.

Hugs to those making progress, hearing crickets, or getting those pesky Rs!

Glad to hear your wrist is doing better Hathor! Fingers crossed that your speedy recovery continues.

Ripken, there's a whole thread called Query Letter Hell (under the Share Your Work section) where people will be happy to give feedback on your query. The top of that form has a lot of great stickies with the rules of the form and a ton of information that can help you diagnose whether or not you're breaking any conventions with your query.

Hi Ripken. The password for Share Your Work/Query Letter Hell is "vista". You need fifty posts to post your query there, and a great way to reach that number is to pay it forward by reading other people's queries and offering your thoughts on how they could make them better. Good luck!

Quickbread said:

Hi Ripken. The password for Share Your Work/Query Letter Hell is "vista". You need fifty posts to post your query there, and a great way to reach that number is to pay it forward by reading other people's queries and offering your thoughts on how they could make them better. Good luck!

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Great, thank you!

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foxfeet said:

Glad to hear your wrist is doing better Hathor! Fingers crossed that your speedy recovery continues.

Ripken, there's a whole thread called Query Letter Hell (under the Share Your Work section) where people will be happy to give feedback on your query. The top of that form has a lot of great stickies with the rules of the form and a ton of information that can help you diagnose whether or not you're breaking any conventions with your query.

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Thanks for the info!

Ripken!

Earthling for R and Hathor for wrist pain (although a hot pink cast sounds rather adorable ).

Oh, and the cast also has a light pink racing stripe now, due to the orthopedic technician's taping up the wide wrapping because the end was free. I'm making quite the fashion statement.

Hathor: Love the pink cast idea! I hope it helps inspire your writing.

I just finished rereading my WIP after 3 CPs raked it over the coals, and sent it off to my agent. Now, I wait.

And, no news on my sub front. Is it weird that I feel odd complaining that I've received no Rs since April? 5 fulls still out with editors.

I always used to tell myself the longer things are out, the more seriously they're being taken!

This was probably just wishful thinking though...

Hey Earthling, no news is good news, right?

At least that's how I'm choosing to see it. We're on 12 weeks and we've only gotten 3 passes.

The cast color wasn't my idea. But, if you like it, Martina, I'll gladly claim credit. At least I'm so noticeable nobody will bang into me by accident.

Bryan Methods said:

I always used to tell myself the longer things are out, the more seriously they're being taken!

This was probably just wishful thinking though...

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Oh how I hope that's true!

I also know from having friends who've worked as interns in these publishing houses that stuff moves veeerrryyyyyy slowly. Even if an editor has received a MS from an agent, they may not look at it for quite a while if they have a lot on their plate.

pinkbowvintage said:

I also know from having friends who've worked as interns in these publishing houses that stuff moves veeerrryyyyyy slowly. Even if an editor has received a MS from an agent, they may not look at it for quite a while if they have a lot on their plate.

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Valid point. It's easy on our end to assume that, if they haven't read, they don't like it or it hasn't 'called' to them. But they could be dying to read it but have other obligations they have to complete first.

That's what I tell myself, anyway.

Or they have read and are of the "no response means no" variety. I like the other possibilities better, though.

I think a non-response on a full is pretty egregious, but I know it happens.

But yeah, it does take time to read submissions, and there are probably 50 other things that have to be read first. I'm sure it can really pile up, which is why so many agents and editors are periodically closed to submisssions.

pinkbowvintage said:

I also know from having friends who've worked as interns in these publishing houses that stuff moves veeerrryyyyyy slowly. Even if an editor has received a MS from an agent, they may not look at it for quite a while if they have a lot on their plate.

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My agent and I were discussing just this. It's true.

Yeah, I'd say especially if the agent has gotten the editor excited about a MS beforehand, and the editor doesn't respond AT ALL...like ever, that just seems like a situation in which an agent simply wouldn't send them anything else in the future or might put them on a "non-responsive" list. Of course it might not mean anything about the MS at all; sometimes editors are simply just swamped and perhaps bite off more than they can chew.

But that's just my educated guess from reading agent and editor blogs and talking to them in person. I'd say if an agent has good relationships with editors, you'll be getting a response eventually.

I think established agents get a feel for who will always answer and who won't. And nonresponders are probably that way for everyone. It would be counterproductive not to sub to an editor who could say yes. Sort of like querying--I don't know about you all, but I approached NRMN folks.

I don't get the impression that the percentage of nonresponding editors (out of those who initially express interest) is as high. We've only got a couple so far where my agent says we might not get a response. Going forward on other fronts, I'm making decisions to seek out folks who could very well not respond. Like I mentioned, they do say yes to some people.

Generally speaking, the responses I've gotten from editors have indicated that long waits are either due do them being totally swamped, having in-house business/job switches disrupt their reading schedule, or because they were on the fence for a long time and didn't want to commit to a no. I've heard that NRMN can happen with editors, but so far we've eventually gotten a reply from everyone we've sent to, though some of those replies took more than a year to reach us. It's really easy to feel down when other people are selling just weeks or a couple of months after they go on submission, but a long submission time doesn't mean you won't get there.

I got a 6-page single spaced edit letter (scary and exciting). I have to look at it in stages, otherwise I just get too overwhelmed. I have the holiday weekend to let it sink in and get comfortable with it. Hoping to do more and write more but have family over for the holiday weekend.

Re no responses from editors, we have had a few of those as well. But generally the ones that have a relationship with your agent or seem interested in the pitches will respond eventually. And long waits don't necessarily mean that the editor won't be interested. Personally though, I haven't ever received good news after a long wait without some sort of hint of interest earlier on.

Hope everyone has a great weekend (and happy Fourth of July weekend to my fellow U.S. hell dwellers)!

Another week gone. Another month gone. Le sigh.

I got another R&R request this week, this time from a digital-only no-advance imprint. Since I don't want to lose momentum on my WIP, and since I don't really agree with the requested changes (unlike the last R&R, when I 100% agreed), AND since we're still out to so many imprints, I'm not going to pursue it. At least, not for now. It feels strange turning down a request 6 months into sub. But I know it's the right call. That doesn't make it any easier to deal with emotionally.

Still, super excited that it's a long weekend! Hope everyone in the US enjoys the extra day off (or the extra day to write write write!).

That sounds like a good decision, diana. If the deal isn't interesting to you, it's probably not worth putting in the work for the chance of a yes from them.

Good luck with the edit letter, funaek! Those are terrifying and exciting indeed.

Wow, fanaek. Looking in stages sounds like a good plan with such a long letter.

Diana: that sounds like a good plan. If you're not excited about the publisher or the editorial suggestions, it doesn't make sense to put the work into it.

Diana, don't feel bad about a pass on that one. I've done the same thing many times.