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Thread: The utterly squalid, wretchedly deprived, bravely-trying-to-maintain-appearances tea salon

  1. #26
    permaflounced
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    Quote Originally Posted by ap123 View Post
    ooh, cucumber!
    I tried to do it all classy, ap. Lord knows I tried.

  2. #27
    Twitching ap123's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW View Post
    I tried to do it all classy, ap. Lord knows I tried.
    pfft. You forgot the sugar cubes.
    Doing the backstroke in the beer moat.

    Try it, you might like it. Blogging life in the big city with Mrs Fringe.

  3. #28
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    I did have sugar cubes. Porter snarfed them all up. And he took a whiz in the sugar bowl.


  4. #29
    Twitching ap123's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW View Post


    I did have sugar cubes. Porter snarfed them all up. And he took a whiz in the sugar bowl.

    aww, s'ok. *attaches baggie of sugar cubes to Little Incredibly Dumb Dog's collar, points her West*

    no guarantees on cleanliness, but they will surely be prelicked!
    Doing the backstroke in the beer moat.

    Try it, you might like it. Blogging life in the big city with Mrs Fringe.

  5. #30
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    Then they'll go perfectly with Susie's cake.

  6. #31
    nutruring tomorrows criminals today PorterStarrByrd's Avatar
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    Ummmm ... those chairs in the dining room aren't weren't very sturdy.
    http://porterstarrbyrd.blogspot.com/

    http://absolutelyunofficialpac12spor....blogspot.com/



    We have met the enemy and he is us - Pogo
    The reason I spend so much time out of the box is that somebody crapped in it - Porter Starr Byrd
    Yield to temptation, it may never come again - unknown
    some people have a hard time keeping up with the vanguard ... of course most of those are called survivors - PSB

  7. #32
    nutruring tomorrows criminals today PorterStarrByrd's Avatar
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    but the cake looks good
    http://porterstarrbyrd.blogspot.com/

    http://absolutelyunofficialpac12spor....blogspot.com/



    We have met the enemy and he is us - Pogo
    The reason I spend so much time out of the box is that somebody crapped in it - Porter Starr Byrd
    Yield to temptation, it may never come again - unknown
    some people have a hard time keeping up with the vanguard ... of course most of those are called survivors - PSB

  8. #33
    nutruring tomorrows criminals today PorterStarrByrd's Avatar
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    got ice cream?
    http://porterstarrbyrd.blogspot.com/

    http://absolutelyunofficialpac12spor....blogspot.com/



    We have met the enemy and he is us - Pogo
    The reason I spend so much time out of the box is that somebody crapped in it - Porter Starr Byrd
    Yield to temptation, it may never come again - unknown
    some people have a hard time keeping up with the vanguard ... of course most of those are called survivors - PSB

  9. #34
    nutruring tomorrows criminals today PorterStarrByrd's Avatar
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    No, I wont need a fork.
    http://porterstarrbyrd.blogspot.com/

    http://absolutelyunofficialpac12spor....blogspot.com/



    We have met the enemy and he is us - Pogo
    The reason I spend so much time out of the box is that somebody crapped in it - Porter Starr Byrd
    Yield to temptation, it may never come again - unknown
    some people have a hard time keeping up with the vanguard ... of course most of those are called survivors - PSB

  10. #35
    Wielder of Shineyyyy Sharp Objects tiddlywinks's Avatar
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    Oooh! New Digs...
    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW View Post
    *waits for droves of sophisticated, wholesome, shiny, clean, non-disgusting, smut-free, flatulence-free humorists*
    Hmm...no, *snort* not really, ooooh....shiney, define clean, maybe?, er..., probably.

    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW View Post
    Looking on the bright side, at least there's no smut.
    Oh, look at that! All those random pamphlets on zombie sex. Now who would go and throw such smut around here?

    *edges behind white couch*
    Loves to tell stories. Finds editing a necessary evil. No longer fueled by coffee (again).
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  11. #36
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    It's pretty much just as disgusting as the cabbie now. Haggis may as well merge it.

    This. This is why we cannot have nice things.

  12. #37
    checking the 'reset' box swachski's Avatar
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    Exactly what kind of smut isn't allowed?
    .
    .
    .



    Quote Originally Posted by Angie View Post
    You're a ray of sunshine in a dark and dreary world, swach.
    Quote Originally Posted by TedTheewen View Post
    Swach is Swach, she's not replaceable and she's nobody's replacement.



    Into every life crap will fall. — Anne Lamott

    Never lose an opportunity to keep your mouth shut. — Isabel Allende

  13. #38
    Wielder of Shineyyyy Sharp Objects tiddlywinks's Avatar
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    Peace offering?



    *sweeps smut pamphlets from floor*
    *dusts china cupboard*
    *knits tea cozies*
    *eyes moose on couch*
    *decorates antlers with tea lights*

    ETA: Sits primly in chair with pinky up. Sips tea. Spits out tea. Smiles politely. Edges tea cup away on table.
    Last edited by tiddlywinks; 02-12-2015 at 06:29 AM.
    Loves to tell stories. Finds editing a necessary evil. No longer fueled by coffee (again).
    ------------


    Red Riding Hood retelling
    - Chapter One (revising)

    Pirate fantasy, Book 1 - Updated Chapter 1 (drafting - almost there!)
    Russian ballerina vampire romance - Chapter 1 (thinking about querying)
    UF romance with zombies, dwarves 'n biker chicks - Chapter 1 (querying)

    Bloggity blog |
    #Tweety tweets | Pinterest plot bunnies

  14. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by swachski View Post
    Exactly what kind of smut isn't allowed?
    Let's put it this way. You are not allowed to speak.

    Quote Originally Posted by tiddlywinks View Post
    Peace offering?



    *sweeps smut pamphlets from floor*
    *dusts china cupboard*
    *knits tea cozies*
    *eyes moose on couch*
    *decorates antlers with tea lights*


    I particularly like the tea cozies.

    *straightens doilies*

  15. #40
    Court Jester Shadow_Ferret's Avatar
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    *gags* What is that smell?

    And what is splattered on the white walls? And the couch?

    Ew.

    Mmm, but the tea is good.
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    “I love words but I don’t like strange ones. You don’t understand them and they don’t understand you. Old words is like old friends, you know ‘em the minute you see ‘em.” -- Will Rogers

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  16. #41
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    I don't know what that stain on the couch is, but I'd recommend not sitting there. Porter was the last one sitting in that spot. 'nuf said.

  17. #42
    checking the 'reset' box swachski's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW View Post
    Let's put it this way. You are not allowed to speak.
    *makes thumbs up sign*

    *twerks on the white sofa*
    .
    .
    .



    Quote Originally Posted by Angie View Post
    You're a ray of sunshine in a dark and dreary world, swach.
    Quote Originally Posted by TedTheewen View Post
    Swach is Swach, she's not replaceable and she's nobody's replacement.



    Into every life crap will fall. — Anne Lamott

    Never lose an opportunity to keep your mouth shut. — Isabel Allende

  18. #43
    Tiddlywinks sat with the pinky up.
    Last edited by Fruitbat; 02-12-2015 at 06:41 AM.

  19. #44
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    Yes. I was very proud of her up until she spewed the tea all over the white carpet.

  20. #45
    Wielder of Shineyyyy Sharp Objects tiddlywinks's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW View Post
    Yes. I was very proud of her up until she spewed the tea all over the white carpet.
    I didn't spew it all over the white carpet.

    *Hides tea stain under pretty Persian rug*

    Caramel Latte Tea, anyone? With sugar, not salt this time?
    Loves to tell stories. Finds editing a necessary evil. No longer fueled by coffee (again).
    ------------


    Red Riding Hood retelling
    - Chapter One (revising)

    Pirate fantasy, Book 1 - Updated Chapter 1 (drafting - almost there!)
    Russian ballerina vampire romance - Chapter 1 (thinking about querying)
    UF romance with zombies, dwarves 'n biker chicks - Chapter 1 (querying)

    Bloggity blog |
    #Tweety tweets | Pinterest plot bunnies

  21. #46
    Your Cuddly Sociopathic AW Moderator Jaycinth's Avatar
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    You gave my cabaret to cray and locked the thread.



    I'm eating all of the bacon by myself.

    By. My. Self.



    ***orders a wardrobe 3 sizes larger and a tanker truck of Jameson***


    ***doesn't founce,
    doesn't trounce,
    just eats bacon by the ounce***
    By JAYCINTH: I have my OWN PAGE at Aquarius Custom Jewelry. Please, come and see and like me on Facebook.
    I'm editing the 'Sensible Man' I STILL love these unpaid gigs


  22. #47
    Handsome servant of a redhead Gilroy Cullen's Avatar
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    So this is what passes for sophisticated humor...

    How droll.

    *lifts curtain, finds a cabbie bar stool*

    Um, you missed something.
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  23. #48
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    This is not working out the way I planned. At. All.

  24. #49
    Touch and go robeiae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW
    You're a smug, sneering, ranting asshole, and yet even when I despise your position, I like you.
    Quote Originally Posted by swachski
    You're a gentleman and a scholar...
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  25. #50
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    I am much discouraged by the pollution of my beautiful, clean tea room by cabbie riff-raff.

    At least there's only one mod. Though in typical jackboot fashion, she's keeping all the bacon and Jameson for herself.

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