Stuck on the Big Reveal

tylertoo · Jan 24, 2015

The ending of my WIP involves the MC making a huge sacrifice in order to find the culprit, and he learns that the culprit is his boss, along with others he'd trusted.

Once the MC realizes its the boss, he confronts him, and the boss and cohorts explain all. Therein lies my problem. The MC has been active in finding the culprit, but once he figures out who, he is passive in the scene in which he learns what and why.

Any suggestions for making this final part of the reveal more interesting than just having the bad guys explain it all?

Sage · Jan 24, 2015

Can he have picked up enough clues to make some of those connections himself, so that he takes on part of the explanation himself?

Also, is he just sitting there while they explain? What else is going on this scene? What prompts them to explain the what and why? What keeps them there? What keeps them from disposing of him some way after her reveals what he knows?

Lhowling · Jan 24, 2015

tylertoo said:
The ending of my WIP involves the MC making a huge sacrifice in order to find the culprit, and he learns that the culprit is his boss, along with others he'd trusted.

Once the MC realizes its the boss, he confronts him, and the boss and cohorts explain all. Therein lies my problem. The MC has been active in finding the culprit, but once he figures out who, he is passive in the scene in which he learns what and why.

Any suggestions for making this final part of the reveal more interesting than just having the bad guys explain it all?

You say that the MC has to make a major sacrifice -- this is part of the character's arc. Your MC goes from being [fill in the blank] in the beginning to [fill in the blank] in the end, and why he has to make that sacrifice is part of what he becomes. What is the greater good, if any, he sees for the sacrifice.

This might be a revelation he himself experiences, and thus the big reveal for me. As a reader, I know at least midway in a book whose done what. As a writer, I care less about the discovery of who did it as a big reveal itself. Big reveals have to have a lasting impression. And so it tends to run deeper. At least that's how I like to look at it. If I've done any good job at my story, it's not only the reader who is wowed (or whatever) by a big reveal, but the MCs as well. When it comes to your story, your big reveal lies within the discussion between boss and MC. Why does the boss feel obliged to let MC in on his details anyway? Why doesn't he kill him? That to me, as well as what the MC character might do next, is what really gets me on the edge of my seat!

Think of memorable villains from books and movies -- I'm assuming that the MC and his boss have a strong, mentoring relationship. The boss knows the MC's flaws. Do you also? Let him fondle those defects, or he could go in the other direction and ask him to join the dark side. What will the MC do?

I always like these types of dynamics within a novel. :evil

Marlys · Jan 24, 2015

One way it might work is if the MC is valuable to the boss and boss's cronies--like, he's a whiz at a part of their Sinister Plan they're having trouble with. Then they might explain what they're doing in a bid to entice him to join them. The MC would be involved in the conversation, either arguing why it wouldn't work, or perhaps pretending to go along with them and offering up suggestions as a bid to gain time until he figures out how to get out of this/cavalry arrives/however it proceeds.

tylertoo · Jan 24, 2015

Thanks all for the speedy replies. You guys are great.

Sage said:
Can he have picked up enough clues to make some of those connections himself, so that he takes on part of the explanation himself?

Currently no, and your question makes me realize that revising the ending so that MC does in fact make the connections himself is the very key to solving my problem. Thank you.

Sage said:
Also, is he just sitting there while they explain? What else is going on this scene?

Yes, he's just sitting there (standing actually, but the same, he's passive once he confronts them, so yuch).

Lhowling said:
What is the greater good, if any, he sees for the sacrifice.

The inciting incident could lead two nations to war; he believes that he must find the culprit to stave that off and comes to realize that only by making that sacrifice (specifically, swearing allegiance for life to the underworld boss) can he find whodunit. So right now the big dramatic moment is his decision to give up his own future in order to learn the answer. But once he learns the answers, the drama fizzles.

Lhowling said:
The boss knows the MC's flaws. Do you also? Let him fondle those defects, or he could go in the other direction and ask him to join the dark side. What will the MC do?

The MC's biggest flaw is intense loyalty. He comes to realize that he has confused loyalty to the nation with loyalty to his boss (the de facto ruler), and his boss has taken advantage of that.

But once he learns this, the MC basically walks away -- the peace has been preserved (his ultimate goal) but he is disillusioned that his boss brought the world to the precipice of war as a way to preserve his hold on power. So he figuratively spits on the guy, leaves and the book ends with him entering his new life, pledged to the underworld. Its not a happy ending.

Marlys said:
One way it might work is if the MC is valuable to the boss and boss's cronies--like, he's a whiz at a part of their Sinister Plan they're having trouble with. Then they might explain what they're doing in a bid to entice him to join them. The MC would be involved in the conversation, either arguing why it wouldn't work, or perhaps pretending to go along with them and offering up suggestions as a bid to gain time until he figures out how to get out of this/cavalry arrives/however it proceeds.

These are all good suggestions. I have a lot to think about.

Supreme_Overlord · Jan 24, 2015

tylertoo said:
Thanks all for the speedy replies. You guys are great.

I know I am.
Wait.
I haven't even replied yet. You must be clairvoyant.

Currently no, and your question makes me realize that revising the ending so that MC does in fact make the connections himself is the very key to solving my problem.

You mention revising your ending. Do you intend to extend this to the whole text, so information spread throughout the story feeds into the MC's revelation?

The MC's biggest flaw is intense loyalty.

This is probably good for increasing the intensity of MC's epiphany and reactions.

Its not a happy ending.

This pleases me.

Lhowling · Jan 24, 2015

tylertoo said:
The inciting incident could lead two nations to war; he believes that he must find the culprit to stave that off and comes to realize that only by making that sacrifice (specifically, swearing allegiance for life to the underworld boss) can he find whodunit. So right now the big dramatic moment is his decision to give up his own future in order to learn the answer. But once he learns the answers, the drama fizzles.

So does he have a hand in an oncoming war, unaware that he has been helping his boss all along with this catastrophe? To me, that would be a real asskicker.

The MC's biggest flaw is intense loyalty. He comes to realize that he has confused loyalty to the nation with loyalty to his boss (the de facto ruler), and his boss has taken advantage of that.

But once he learns this, the MC basically walks away -- the peace has been preserved (his ultimate goal) but he is disillusioned that his boss brought the world to the precipice of war as a way to preserve his hold on power. So he figuratively spits on the guy, leaves and the book ends with him entering his new life, pledged to the underworld. Its not a happy ending.

There has to be a reason why he can't walk away now. You have to drive him to his very limit, then see what he needs to do next.

Or you need to let someone or something intervene. The traditional damsel in distress has always worked but you can always use something or someone else to motivate your character to stop his boss. There may be peace around him, but during those final moments of confrontation, does the MC feel peace within himself? If he does, then you haven't challenged him enough.

Also I don't get why the boss is letting him just walk away? Does he not see the MC as a threat of some sort? If not, then your MC requires qualities that will make him a threat. His flaw is intense royalty... okay, if this is the main flaw for your MC, then you got show him hurt. You gotta show him when he's at his very limit. If intense loyalty is not enough to get him there, then you may need to reevaluate the MC's flaw.

Maybe he's so enraged over his boss's betrayal the MC kills him or the one thing the Boss loves. Then, he's on the run from the cops, and you can lead it up to a climactic ending where he tries to find an escape.

tylertoo · Jan 24, 2015

Lhowling thank you, you raise some very good questions about how the story ends and I know I need to examine them. They are somewhat separate from my original question, which is about seeking a more dramatic way to reveal the boss's complicity.

But in terms of what the MC does once that complicity is revealed:

Lhowling said:
There has to be a reason why he can't walk away now.

I don't see why the MC can't just walk away. I'm not trying to be argumentative; just trying to understand why the good guy has to prevail.

My goal is an ironic ending: the MC is able to preserve the peace but at great personal cost, and only by unwittingly propping up what he comes to realize is a corrupt leader. To attack the boss once he realizes that, or to reveal the boss's complicity to the nation, would only undermine the precarious peace that is his ultimate goal. The boss lets him walk away because he knows this.

All that said, I do intend to re-examine the WIP's resolution based on your questions, so thanks!

Supreme_Overlord · Jan 24, 2015

tylertoo said:
I don't see why the MC can't just walk away. I'm not trying to be argumentative; just trying to understand why the good guy has to prevail.

I don't think it's about the good guy prevailing at all. If the good guy loses, there still has to be a reason he couldn't have walked away at the tough choices--even if it turns out he's just too stubborn for his own good.

If the protagonist can only accomplish something through great personal cost, there should be some reason he goes on rather than says, "Nope, not doing it."

Likewise, if he is just standing there being explained at, why is he just standing there?

tylertoo · Jan 25, 2015

Supreme_Overlord said:
I don't think it's about the good guy prevailing at all. If the good guy loses, there still has to be a reason he couldn't have walked away at the tough choices--even if it turns out he's just too stubborn for his own good.

If the protagonist can only accomplish something through great personal cost, there should be some reason he goes on rather than says, "Nope, not doing it."

Likewise, if he is just standing there being explained at, why is he just standing there?

All very good questions, ones that I need to answer through revision. Thanks!

Stuck on the Big Reveal

tylertoo

Sage

Supreme Guessinator

Lhowling

Mischief Witch

Marlys

Resist. Love. Go outside.

tylertoo

Supreme_Overlord

horrific and tragical

Lhowling

Mischief Witch

tylertoo

Supreme_Overlord

horrific and tragical

tylertoo