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Thread: Hounding from the Depths of Perdition

  1. #51
    Always writing AW Moderator Calla Lily's Avatar
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    And people claim English is difficult to learn.

  2. #52
    You can't forget those you've loved AW Moderator SaraP's Avatar
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    Only took me a few months. Then again, I pretty much had no choice, being immersed in it as I was. And while it is easier than Portuguese in a lot of ways, there are plenty of traps here and there.
    Lady Sparkles, SparklePony, The SparklePony of DOOOOOM, Sparkles, Sparkles McModderson, The Sparkler, Sparklegee, The Sparkling Portuguee... I think I see a pattern here. Oh, and Horny McPoarny.


    We all smile in the same language

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    Life getting you down? Come get a pick-me-up.

  3. #53
    practical experience, FTW TedTheewen's Avatar
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    I wish I had been imersed in a language when I was young. Instead, I only learned Mexican slang cusswords.

  4. #54
    You can't forget those you've loved AW Moderator SaraP's Avatar
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    Did you know that it's biologically harder to learn a new language after you pass the teen years? It's why kids learn them so much better, and easier.
    Lady Sparkles, SparklePony, The SparklePony of DOOOOOM, Sparkles, Sparkles McModderson, The Sparkler, Sparklegee, The Sparkling Portuguee... I think I see a pattern here. Oh, and Horny McPoarny.


    We all smile in the same language

    ***
    Life getting you down? Come get a pick-me-up.

  5. #55
    practical experience, FTW TedTheewen's Avatar
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    I know. But I can speak hillbilly, redneck and trailer park.

  6. #56
    Evil, undead Chihuahua SuperModerator Haggis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SaraP View Post
    In my defense, I was ten years old at the time, and still struggling with English.

    (Btw, Brazil is Brasil and Norway is Noruega. Oh, and while Turkey is Turquia, Peru is also Peru.)
    Wait. I thought Turkey was Peru.

    And Who's on first.
    Quote Originally Posted by Curlz View Post
    For those of you that don't know what "haggis" is, I can only say that it's much better not knowing anyway
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  7. #57
    writing soapdish's Avatar
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    GUYS And ...

    There is a job in the want ads near me for a "Decapitated head trimmer"

    I. Am. Not. Kidding.
    And by came an angel who had a bright key,
    And he opened the coffins and set them all free. -- "The Chimney Sweeper" -- William Blake

  8. #58
    practical experience, FTW TedTheewen's Avatar
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    Do they mention pay?

    Seems legit to me.

  9. #59
    Evil, undead Chihuahua SuperModerator Haggis's Avatar
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    Do they just need one?
    Quote Originally Posted by Curlz View Post
    For those of you that don't know what "haggis" is, I can only say that it's much better not knowing anyway
    Stewie the Chihuey
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  10. #60
    You can't forget those you've loved AW Moderator SaraP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by soapdish View Post
    GUYS And ...

    There is a job in the want ads near me for a "Decapitated head trimmer"

    I. Am. Not. Kidding.
    I wonder what qualifications they require.

    *showers in sparkles - again*
    Lady Sparkles, SparklePony, The SparklePony of DOOOOOM, Sparkles, Sparkles McModderson, The Sparkler, Sparklegee, The Sparkling Portuguee... I think I see a pattern here. Oh, and Horny McPoarny.


    We all smile in the same language

    ***
    Life getting you down? Come get a pick-me-up.

  11. #61
    practical experience, FTW TedTheewen's Avatar
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    I would love to get a job at a funeral home. I've tried a few times, but those jobs aren't easy to come by. They pay well, usually it's a family doing the hiring, and it's hard to get fired. I know a guy who went to school for mortuary science. After about 2 years of school, he graduated and made 100K a year right from the beginning.

    I did, however, used to work in a cemetery. Loved it, but it didn't pay well and was seasonal.

  12. #62
    You can't forget those you've loved AW Moderator SaraP's Avatar
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    *shudders*

    I get creeped out enough by Victorian photos of the dead.
    Lady Sparkles, SparklePony, The SparklePony of DOOOOOM, Sparkles, Sparkles McModderson, The Sparkler, Sparklegee, The Sparkling Portuguee... I think I see a pattern here. Oh, and Horny McPoarny.


    We all smile in the same language

    ***
    Life getting you down? Come get a pick-me-up.

  13. #63
    practical experience, FTW TedTheewen's Avatar
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    If I worked in the funeral business, I would have to stop my blog because the necrophilia jokes would get me into trouble.

  14. #64
    Always writing AW Moderator Calla Lily's Avatar
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    I would consider hairdresser's school for a job like that.

  15. #65
    writing soapdish's Avatar
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    No, this job description didn't mention pay. But who cares because, DECAPITATED HEAD TRIMMER! Just to be able to say that's what you *do* would be awesome.

    Haggis, I think there was only an opening for one. But I didn't apply, so you have a little less competition if you want to go for it.

    There didn't appear to be any qualifications. Except perhaps not getting queasy on the job.

    I was actually considering applying (because how could I not and also because I'm sort of half seriously looking for the right job to start in the fall). But I did a little looking at the "heads" on their website and while the gory ones (tendons hanging, eyeballs falling out etc.) didn't really bother me, there were some simpler ones that had virtually no gore, just twisted expressions on their faces, that I'm not sure I could handle working with day to day.

    You know, the kinds of faces/expressions that are personal to *you*, straight out of your own nightmares.

    I have felt bad if I took the job and then couldn't stick with it later. That's not fair to an employer. *sigh*

    I think I'd like to work for a funeral home. But it'd depend on what position.
    I'd see myself in more of a death doula role. Only not for the one dying, but for the family after it's happened. I don't know what they call that role though.
    Last edited by soapdish; 07-29-2014 at 02:06 AM.
    And by came an angel who had a bright key,
    And he opened the coffins and set them all free. -- "The Chimney Sweeper" -- William Blake

  16. #66
    You can't forget those you've loved AW Moderator SaraP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by soapdish View Post
    I'd see myself in more of a death doula role. Only not for the one dying, but for the family after it's happened. I don't know what they call that role though.
    Can I just say, I LOVE that expression?
    Lady Sparkles, SparklePony, The SparklePony of DOOOOOM, Sparkles, Sparkles McModderson, The Sparkler, Sparklegee, The Sparkling Portuguee... I think I see a pattern here. Oh, and Horny McPoarny.


    We all smile in the same language

    ***
    Life getting you down? Come get a pick-me-up.

  17. #67
    Evil, undead Chihuahua SuperModerator Haggis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by soapdish View Post
    I'd see myself in more of a death doula role. Only not for the one dying, but for the family after it's happened. I don't know what they call that role though.
    Cashier?
    Quote Originally Posted by Curlz View Post
    For those of you that don't know what "haggis" is, I can only say that it's much better not knowing anyway
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    Stop by the Weekend Progress Report to brag about your weekly writing accomplishments




  18. #68
    Today is your last day. FOTSGreg's Avatar
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    <staggers into bar, broken steering wheel hanging around neck, clothes smoking and in tatters, the handle of a gear shift clutched tightly in one hand>

    Well, that was fun!

    Hope whoever rented the truck also paid for the insurance.

    Not that I expect anyone actually "rented" it. "Borrowed" in the deepest black of night is more some folks' style.

    Find my books on Smashwords at https://www.smashwords.com/profile/view/fotsgreg
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  19. #69
    writing soapdish's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SaraP View Post
    Can I just say, I LOVE that expression?
    I thought you might. Have you not heard it before?

    Quote Originally Posted by Haggis View Post
    Cashier?

    Quote Originally Posted by FOTSGreg View Post
    <staggers into bar, broken steering wheel hanging around neck, clothes smoking and in tatters, the handle of a gear shift clutched tightly in one hand>

    Well, that was fun!

    Hope whoever rented the truck also paid for the insurance.

    Not that I expect anyone actually "rented" it. "Borrowed" in the deepest black of night is more some folks' style.
    We rented a truck? WHY? We have Ted's van.
    And by came an angel who had a bright key,
    And he opened the coffins and set them all free. -- "The Chimney Sweeper" -- William Blake

  20. #70
    Evil, undead Chihuahua SuperModerator Haggis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by soapdish View Post
    I thought you might. Have you not heard it before?



    We rented a truck? WHY? We have Ted's van.
    It was a speshul truck, Soapy.
    Quote Originally Posted by Curlz View Post
    For those of you that don't know what "haggis" is, I can only say that it's much better not knowing anyway
    Stewie the Chihuey
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    Stop by the Weekend Progress Report to brag about your weekly writing accomplishments




  21. #71
    Pasture-ized slcboston's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Calla Lily View Post
    And people claim English is difficult to learn.
    They should try teaching it.






    Which I would rather have done to a roomful of monkeys than endure the all-day meeting that was my day today.

    I'm fried.

    Answer the Question of the Week! Not just for newcomers any more!

    ďBut I donít want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
    "Oh, you canít help that," said the Cat. "Weíre all mad here. Iím mad. Youíre mad."
    "How do you know Iím mad?" said Alice.
    "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldnít have come here.Ē

  22. #72
    practical experience, FTW TedTheewen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Haggis View Post
    Cashier?
    LOL...I love that! Death's Cashier....Death Doula.

    Death Doula is the perfect title.

  23. #73
    AW's resident Velociraptor ShaunHorton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by slcboston View Post
    They should try teaching it.






    Which I would rather have done to a roomful of monkeys than endure the all-day meeting that was my day today.

    I'm fried.

    Funny that. My cousin has applied to go teach English in Russia. He doesn't speak Russian, he has no teaching experience, and he doesn't even speak English all that well. :-P Plus he stutters on top of it. I asked him what he's going to do if war breaks out while he's there, he says it's not really that bad over there...

    I may have need of a decapitated head trimmer shortly. Assuming he successfully crowdfunds the three grand he needs to get over there.
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  24. #74
    You can't forget those you've loved AW Moderator SaraP's Avatar
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    I had never heard of Death Doula before. It's just such a lovely term, though.

    Quote Originally Posted by ShaunHorton View Post
    My cousin has applied to go teach English in Russia.
    Why Russia, if I may ask? (If you know, that is.)

    Good afternoon, Hounds. Let's be grateful today for cafes with wi-fi where I can plug in my laptop, shall we? *sigh*
    Lady Sparkles, SparklePony, The SparklePony of DOOOOOM, Sparkles, Sparkles McModderson, The Sparkler, Sparklegee, The Sparkling Portuguee... I think I see a pattern here. Oh, and Horny McPoarny.


    We all smile in the same language

    ***
    Life getting you down? Come get a pick-me-up.

  25. #75
    Pasture-ized slcboston's Avatar
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    Honestly, were it not for other concerns, I would be overseas.

    The money is good, the experience fantastic, and the IRS (and other creditors) can't follow you.

    Answer the Question of the Week! Not just for newcomers any more!

    ďBut I donít want to go among mad people," Alice remarked.
    "Oh, you canít help that," said the Cat. "Weíre all mad here. Iím mad. Youíre mad."
    "How do you know Iím mad?" said Alice.
    "You must be," said the Cat, "or you wouldnít have come here.Ē

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