AW's Super-Dooper Newbie Pub Where Newbies Can Chat With Golden Oldies

I am a cat lover I'm also a lover of dogs and all animals in general but not so much those poisonous venomous creepy ones you know. They can bite with a bite of deathly circumstances.

I'll just occupy that table overthere in preparation for my maiden introductory speech.
Bartender…... this looks like someone threw up here.

I think this bar needs a cat to class up the joint.

Willer, I am similar. I love most animals but the creepy poisonous ones are best avoided. Cats are my first loves though. I enjoy dogs as well and have owned a couple and hope to own more some day.

Yes GypsyLayla, it's been neglected for some time because the noobs like us dwelling in this alleged super-dooper watering hole are ignored by big wigs until we rise in unity and yell out and show them once and for all that we are the force to be reckoned with. The joint our noobs pub really deserves cat class status that commands attention.

I love cats for the fact that they bring good fortune and they are depicted in some mythologies as goddesses of love and fertility. We all know they have nine lives and no matter which way you throw a cat into the air they always land on their paws. ( In contrast to throwing a human up in the air.)

There are other amazing things to be said about our feline friends but at some later times.

And just imagine all this praise for pussies coming from an old dog like me!

Willer, I love your wit. And I'm reading Wee Free Men by Pratchett. (I've read all his adult books but was delaying this because I liked having books of his unread. It was like... he's not really gone if I still have books of his to read. Love that man. I am enjoying the read, though it is bittersweet.). And you line about throwing humans up in the air made me laugh and reminded me of his writing. I do hope whatever you write, you let your humor shine through.

Let me know when it's time to rise. I refuse to shine though, FYI.

yawning as I stretch and see new pubbers very nice to see new faces. I trip over a kitty bowl and pet the tabby sleeping on the bar chair. Ahh brought in our furry friends too I see. I make a note to others to include kitty treats on the next supply run. I get a drink of coffee and settle down to edit ....and edit......dang I really need get through this process and move on to writing. Happy Monday it is rain/sleet day here in ohio hope it is sunny somewhere.

Hi Jim, No sun here. Overcast in CA. I brought some cat food and some treats to tide the tabby over. I'm taking a break from the hell that is queries. Will be back at it in a few days, beta reading (trade) for now.

Have you guys seen this? https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0732YRC27/?tag=absowrit-20 I bought it for my husband (and co-writing partner).

Do you know, I just realised I have never posted in this thread before. And I am both old and practically golden.

GypsyLayla said:

Have you guys seen this? https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0732YRC27/?tag=absowrit-20 I bought it for my husband (and co-writing partner).

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That's adorable.

Thanks for the recommended book The Wee Free Men GypsyLayla, I have already started on the first chapter A Clang Well Done and Miss Tick the witch and her exploring the universe.

I like this writing on the stall sign:

THE WONDERS OF PUNCTUATION AND SPELLING
1*ABSOLUTE CERTAINTY ABOUT THE COMMA!
2*I BEFORE E COMPLETELY SORTED OUT!
3*THE MYSTERY OF THE SEMICOLON REVEALED!!!
4*SEE THE AMPERSAND! (SMALL EXTRA CHARGE)
5*FUN WITH BRACKETS!
** WILL ACCEPT VEGETABLES, EGGS, AND CLEAN USED CLOTHING **


Hang on! GypsyLayla has disappeared into thin air. Women never stay long in one place nowadays.

Jill thanks for the welcome but I wonder if you notice your orange tabby ginger ninja has disappeared into thin air as well.

Nonetheless if you happen to peep in here again I'm struggling with my maiden introduction in that it 'got to be worded in a way that my master (wife) can't figure out who I am Otherwise I can not write freely to my liking for harsh criticism and cruel barbs from her and her sister (and the other members that constitute my bona fide family like our cats , dogs , hamsters and meerkat ) will be abundant.

Bartender….traditional absinthe with lots of thujone!


ETA:
No she's back. I don't know about the cat. (I think the cat turned into a grandma - am I hallucinating already?)

Glad you like it MC!

Willer, have you read Pratchett before? If you haven't, I suggest going to look up the Night Watch series and starting with Guards! Guards!. You are welcome for the recommendation, Pratchett is a singular talent. You may also want to pick up Good Omens, a collaboration with Neil Gaimen.

Orange tabby comes strolling back in....

Grandma is curiously absent. There might be more to the cat than we'd originally thought.

You know what I like best about Absolute Write so far? Everyone knows the difference between wary and weary. I get twitchy when I see the two confused on other boards. It's all I can do not not hit caps lock and start yelling.

I'd still like someone to clear up some of those grammatical mysteries for me. Even the Gods of Google haven't sufficiently explained the semi colon for me, I fear.

Terry is getting to me. I've got the Guards!Guards! novel. The story starts with noir film sentiment permeating through crime / detective mystery fiction and ends with a Hollywood happy ending.
Sort of.
I skimmed through it and lest I be crucified for ignorance I must say Pratchett's whimsical wits and humour made my day.

There is more to our orange tabby than cheap sorcery tricks and I think it my be a werecat. Some people around here are possessed of therianthropy. Oh my God, otherkins are amongst us.
Scary.
I find that people often confuse the words illegible and unreadable and the lurkers would probably apply this latter to my posts punctually. I hold no grudge against them.

Bartender I need my magic potion

I am happy you enjoyed the Prattchet novels. My personal favorites are the later Nightwatch books especially Night Watch and 5th Elephant (but they must be read in order, IMO), Monsterous Regiment (which chronologically takes place much much later than Guards!) and the Death Novels, especially anything with Susan, including the Hogfather. Oh and Cohan the Barbarian (which is a must in hardcover) which is largely a standalone.

My favorite characters are Lord Vetinari and Leonard of Quirm, Granny Weatherwax (who could shave the skin off a second), Susan and the Death of Mice.

Hmm... I'll have to keep an eye on the tabby.

illegible and unreadable, YES!

Hello new and old members! I'm new! I shall add the recommended Bailey's to my coffee. This thread is overwhelmingly long, but I am having fun reading random pages Thanks for giving me a place to start getting to know people!

SaraP said:

*looks at the muffins on her counter*

Soft and warm and delicious, golden brown on top with the blueberries still kind of oozing.

(Yes, I'm totally being mean right now.)

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Behold the wonders of the internet, where muffins you made in August can still give me cravings mid-November! Well played, SaraP. Well played.

RenchiDoodle said:

Hello new and old members! I'm new! I shall add the recommended Bailey's to my coffee. This thread is overwhelmingly long, but I am having fun reading random pages Thanks for giving me a place to start getting to know people!

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Welcome. Thats a good start. Baileys!

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GypsyLayla said:

I am happy you enjoyed the Prattchet novels. My personal favorites are the later Nightwatch books especially Night Watch and 5th Elephant (but they must be read in order, IMO), Monsterous Regiment (which chronologically takes place much much later than Guards!) and the Death Novels, especially anything with Susan, including the Hogfather. Oh and Cohan the Barbarian (which is a must in hardcover) which is largely a standalone.

My favorite characters are Lord Vetinari and Leonard of Quirm, Granny Weatherwax (who could shave the skin off a second), Susan and the Death of Mice.

Hmm... I'll have to keep an eye on the tabby.

illegible and unreadable, YES!

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I'd no sooner begun to read your post when the wife brought a brimful carafe of vin ordinaire. My maxim is never to refuse succour for such noble deeds of her which otherwise may appear manifestly unjust. Then there were more. I can tell you with absolute certainty that the "dramatis personae" as Terry put it including God, Metatron, Aziraphale, Satan , Beelzebub (Devil), Hastur (Devil), Ligur (Devil), Crowley (Devil), Death, War, Famine, Pollution, Sister Mary (A Satanic Nun) amongst other interesting characters will certainly appeal to my wife who spent her youth being a gothic maven and Goth with an unsuspecting name Ravena. I can envisage an eyeliner smudged and deathrock to the max and her reading this novel out loud. The epic novel has been twenty five years in making and as Neil said "...Terry and I wrote a book together. It began as a parody of Richmal Crompton’s William books…" So there is that.

My count is low and so is the avatar size I suspect there is a causal relationship.

The time is near. A 3000 years old conflict between good and evil. Who will emerge victorious . I've a bowl (created with my 3d printer) full of smoking incense to enhance illusion of unoriginated reality for before me I see (a bit alleviated above the ground surface them and the conscience ) jasper and ruby appearing on the horizon.

Armageddon is coming but as I'm read this novel Young (and the gang) will prevent gods revenge on unbelieving heathens.I couldn't help but to lookat the end of it and Adam got his apple again. I must say the book is full of clichés told interestingly at each paragraph provoking a lough. And theres a lot of paragraphs.
.
Back to what I;m here for.
My lede is here and it is not as the convincing should be then I m compelled to splice the main brace for now Before though I devise a nutgraf which is necessary I'll make myself available to obtain the services of acceptable counsel.and profit from the great learning and generous advices.

Willer said:

Yes GypsyLayla, it's been neglected for some time because the noobs like us dwelling in this alleged super-dooper watering hole are ignored by big wigs until we rise in unity and yell out and show them once and for all that we are the force to be reckoned with.

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*yawns*

KellyAssauer said:

*yawns*

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What an elegence… Just what I need a worm embrace.
thx

Bartender…traditional absinthe with lots of thujone! Need some inspiration.

Back to work!



Introductory Post Draft 1,0.0
Prewriting

This is not a formal writing therefore endure or go buy yourself some milk for a cuppa or visit apothecaries or something.

What genres do you write?
A good many of.
Thinking of writing my own story brings a sense of forebodings for far too many people would enjoy and say we're glad he's got his just deserts (or more commonly you deserve all of it, ye dawg)


What do you like to read?
I used to read early comics such as Mr Oldbuck , first paperback editions of Superman and some Slam Bradleys amongst others proved to be an enormous boon for my later edukashun and life philosophy. Nowadays I mostly read AW pages , some its recommendations and obituaries.

How long have you been writing?
I perceive myself as a child writing prodigy never fully discovered as a precocious ankle biter at a loss for world literature and language never gave a damn. I first started writing at age 2 on a pre kinder team when I managed to finger trace the whole alphabet on handwriting worksheets (to an enormous surprise of my contemporaries).


Do you have any particular hobbies? Are you expert in any particular field or craft?


Do you beta read?

to be continued

Greetings everyone. Bartender, one hot cocoa with mashmallows, please

I'm new here, going to read this thread to see what this place is.
Any other fun threads you recommend?
I'm looking forward to reading more stuff here.

Willer said:

What genres do you write?

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and what if you don't write genre fiction?

Hi everyone! Just popping in to say hi, and introduce myself. I'm Alison and I write mostly contemporary fiction (YA/NA). So pumped to make some new writing friends and read all of your awesome work

Aeryndale said:

Greetings everyone. Bartender, one hot cocoa with mashmallows, please

I'm new here, going to read this thread to see what this place is.
Any other fun threads you recommend?
I'm looking forward to reading more stuff here.

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I'll serve you your drink Aeryndale since our full time bartender went belly up on a bartop. Here you go. .


"Any other fun threads" are elsewhere on awboards aplenty this is the recruitment joint for a noobs brethrenhood initiation (no blood wings) to set you on the right way for esprit de corps in your AW life.


Observe the hologram plague there engraved with “Give and you will receive” then make of it what you will

KellyAssauer said:

and what if you don't write genre fiction?

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I can feel my third mental breakdown is about accompanied with writer's block. Let me visit my friend Prozac for a sec.(you belong to Prozac Nation too luv) (But I'm worried though it's been said it takes sexual drive down to absolute zero which some of my literary works often call for not as much as Ann Bauer's,mind.

I'll Be Back ….in a jiffy.

Hullo, hullo! *waves to new faces & not-so-new Pubbers*

mccardey said:

Do you know, I just realised I have never posted in this thread before. And I am both old and practically golden.

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*slides over mug of coffee spiked with Bailey's* Aye. I'm starting to feel more rusty than golden...

Willer said:

But I'm worried though it's been said it takes sexual drive down to absolute zero which some of my literary works often call for not as much as Ann Bauer's,mind.

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Thank you for this.
I've been wondering what the advantages are in being asexual, and now at least I have one.
I've never had to purchase prozac.
This is good.
I like it.