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Thread: Limericks Still Live!

  1. #5251
    There once was a tyrant named Kim
    Whose prospects of marriage were slim.
    He called Trump for advice
    (After all--he's wed thrice)
    Covfefe, Trump said. Grab 'em by the qwim.


    There once was a painter named Dave
    Last edited by Fruitbat; 08-12-2017 at 05:22 AM.

  2. #5252
    Benefactor Member Nymtoc's Avatar
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    There once was a painter named Dave
    Who raffishly would misbehave



    "Ignorance is an evil weed, which dictators may cultivate among their dupes, but which no democracy can afford among its citizens." -- William Beveridge

  3. #5253
    There once was a painter named Dave
    Who raffishly would misbehave
    He painted his brother

  4. #5254
    Imagine something clever here. CDSinex's Avatar
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    There once was a painter named Dave
    Who raffishly would misbehave
    He painted his brother,
    which upset their mother
    Some of my previously published poems are now on PoemHunter CDSinex

    Clay is molded to make a vessel, but the utility of the vessel lies in the space where there is nothing. Lao Tzu (c. 601~ 531 B.C.E.)

  5. #5255
    There once was a painter named Dave
    Who raffishly would misbehave
    He painted his brother,
    which upset their mother
    To her, a pink mustache he gave

  6. #5256
    Quote Originally Posted by Fruitbat View Post
    There once was a painter named Dave
    Who raffishly would misbehave
    He painted his brother,
    which upset their mother
    To her, a pink mustache he gave
    CDSinex was stuck in a tree

  7. #5257
    Benefactor Member Nymtoc's Avatar
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    CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
    Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"


    "Ignorance is an evil weed, which dictators may cultivate among their dupes, but which no democracy can afford among its citizens." -- William Beveridge

  8. #5258
    CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
    Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"
    He tried to fly down

  9. #5259
    Sit Down, and Shut Up! Lavern08's Avatar
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    CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
    Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"
    He tried to fly down

    Then said with a frown
    BREAKFAST WITH LAVERN: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9ui68rmpcw


    Quote Originally Posted by Haggis View Post
    Yeah, I know Ted, but Vernie is hawt nice.

    Quote Originally Posted by TedTheewen View Post
    Everybody loves Lavern.

    Quote Originally Posted by Haggis View Post
    I blurves me some Vernie.

    Quote Originally Posted by TedTheewen View Post
    Damn, Haggis...Vernie would be upset, and nobody wants to see that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mclesh View Post
    I love you, Lavern. That is all.
    Quote Originally Posted by RNJ View Post
    Lavern! Lavern! Lavern!

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  10. #5260
    Benefactor Member Nymtoc's Avatar
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    CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
    Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"
    He tried to fly down

    Then said with a frown,
    "Well, at least I got acorns for free."

    Lavern likes to dance while she sings


    "Ignorance is an evil weed, which dictators may cultivate among their dupes, but which no democracy can afford among its citizens." -- William Beveridge

  11. #5261
    Sit Down, and Shut Up! Lavern08's Avatar
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    Lavern likes to dance while she sings
    She also likes lavender things
    BREAKFAST WITH LAVERN: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d9ui68rmpcw


    Quote Originally Posted by Haggis View Post
    Yeah, I know Ted, but Vernie is hawt nice.

    Quote Originally Posted by TedTheewen View Post
    Everybody loves Lavern.

    Quote Originally Posted by Haggis View Post
    I blurves me some Vernie.

    Quote Originally Posted by TedTheewen View Post
    Damn, Haggis...Vernie would be upset, and nobody wants to see that.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mclesh View Post
    I love you, Lavern. That is all.
    Quote Originally Posted by RNJ View Post
    Lavern! Lavern! Lavern!

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    Please consider a voluntary subscription to defray ongoing expenses.


  12. #5262
    Lavern likes to dance while she sings
    She also likes lavender things
    In her purple tutu and cape

  13. #5263
    Imagine something clever here. CDSinex's Avatar
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    Lavern likes to dance while she sings
    She also likes lavender things
    In her purple tutu and cape,
    looking just like a grape
    Some of my previously published poems are now on PoemHunter CDSinex

    Clay is molded to make a vessel, but the utility of the vessel lies in the space where there is nothing. Lao Tzu (c. 601~ 531 B.C.E.)

  14. #5264
    Lavern likes to dance while she sings
    She also likes lavender things
    In her purple tutu and cape,
    looking just like a grape
    She stars on the stage in Hot Springs

    There once was a plumber named Frank

  15. #5265
    Benefactor Member Nymtoc's Avatar
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    There once was a plumber named Frank
    Who did his best work when he drank


    "Ignorance is an evil weed, which dictators may cultivate among their dupes, but which no democracy can afford among its citizens." -- William Beveridge

  16. #5266
    There once was a plumber named Frank
    Who did his best work when he drank
    Or so he believed

  17. #5267
    Benefactor Member Nymtoc's Avatar
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    There once was a plumber named Frank
    Who did his best work when he drank
    Or so he believed
    Until all the peeved


    "Ignorance is an evil weed, which dictators may cultivate among their dupes, but which no democracy can afford among its citizens." -- William Beveridge

  18. #5268
    There once was a plumber named Frank
    Who did his best work when he drank
    Or so he believed
    Until all the peeved
    Threw him in a septic tank


    There once was a copper named Bick

    Last edited by Fruitbat; 08-13-2017 at 08:58 PM.

  19. #5269
    Imagine something clever here. CDSinex's Avatar
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    There once was a copper named Bick,
    who on Fridays would call in sick
    Some of my previously published poems are now on PoemHunter CDSinex

    Clay is molded to make a vessel, but the utility of the vessel lies in the space where there is nothing. Lao Tzu (c. 601~ 531 B.C.E.)

  20. #5270
    Bartender, gimme a Linux Mint Matera the Mad's Avatar
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    There once was a copper named Bick,
    who on Fridays would call in sick
    He put me in jail
    Inspiration can be as destructive as any other form of fire.

  21. #5271
    Benefactor Member Nymtoc's Avatar
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    There once was a copper named Bick,
    who on Fridays would call in sick
    He put me in jail
    Where I pen this sad tale


    "Ignorance is an evil weed, which dictators may cultivate among their dupes, but which no democracy can afford among its citizens." -- William Beveridge

  22. #5272
    Go down road, go pub. Mary Mitchell's Avatar
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    Ontario Canada
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    There once was a copper named Bick,
    who on Fridays would call in sick
    He put me in jail
    Where I pen this sad tale
    While he plays "Freedom Fridays", that pr**k.

    A dog and a cat can't be friends?
    It's a simple fact of life that not everyone will be your target audience.

  23. #5273
    Imagine something clever here. CDSinex's Avatar
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    A dog and a cat can't be friends.
    We all know how that thing ends.
    Some of my previously published poems are now on PoemHunter CDSinex

    Clay is molded to make a vessel, but the utility of the vessel lies in the space where there is nothing. Lao Tzu (c. 601~ 531 B.C.E.)

  24. #5274
    Benefactor Member Nymtoc's Avatar
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    A dog and a cat can't be friends.
    We all know how that thing ends.
    Fur flies through the air


    "Ignorance is an evil weed, which dictators may cultivate among their dupes, but which no democracy can afford among its citizens." -- William Beveridge

  25. #5275
    Imagine something clever here. CDSinex's Avatar
    Join Date
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    Willamette Valley, Oregon
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    A dog and a cat can't be friends.
    We all know how that thing ends.

    Fur flies through the air,
    just like a nightmare.
    Some of my previously published poems are now on PoemHunter CDSinex

    Clay is molded to make a vessel, but the utility of the vessel lies in the space where there is nothing. Lao Tzu (c. 601~ 531 B.C.E.)

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