Limericks Still Live!

JoBird · Mar 3, 2013

No wonder the waiters at my local Korean restaurant look at me so funny when I order 'kim chee'.

I had a big bite of kimchi
With a soju cup full to the brim-chi.
Don't get sick like me

I just bought a big can of SPAM™
But my guest said, "No thank you, ma'am."

Steve Coate · Mar 3, 2013

I just bought a big can of SPAM™
But my guest said, "No thank you, ma'am."
I'll stick with green eggs & ham.

flyingtart · Mar 4, 2013

I once had a big bite of kimchi
With a soju cup full to the brim-chi.
Don't get sick like me
Or you will soon see
Why brim-chi of kimchi is grim-chi

I just bought a big can of SPAM™
But my guest said, "No thank you, ma'am.
I'll stick with green eggs
And porcupine legs

Nymtoc · Mar 4, 2013

I just bought a big can of SPAM™
But my guest said, "No thank you, ma'am.
I'll stick with green eggs
And porcupine legs
Garnished with strawberry jam.

You know that I never use slang

annetpfeffer · Mar 4, 2013

You know that I never use slang
My prose is perfection -- hot dang!

flyingtart · Mar 4, 2013

You know that I never use slang
My prose is perfection -- hot dang!
It's always admired

kenthepen · Mar 4, 2013

You know that I never use slang
My prose is perfection -- hot dang!
It's always admired
If not very inspired

flyingtart · Mar 4, 2013

You know that I never use slang
My prose is perfection -- hot dang!
It's always admired
If not very inspired
And is characterised by a twang

The stoat is an unlikely pet

Nymtoc · Mar 4, 2013

The stoat is an unlikely pet
But mine is a shameless coquette

kenthepen · Mar 4, 2013

The stoat is an unlikely pet
But mine is a shameless coquette
She'll flirt with a weasel

annetpfeffer · Mar 4, 2013

The stoat is an unlikely pet
But mine is a shameless coquette
She'll flirt with a weasel
She'll taunt and she'll tease'll

flyingtart · Mar 4, 2013

The stoat is an unlikely pet
But mine is a shameless coquette
She'll flirt with a weasel
She'll taunt and she'll tease'll
That prove she's the tawdriest yet?

No, hedgehogs are worse, so I've heard

kenthepen · Mar 4, 2013

No, hedgehogs are worse, so I've heard
They'll flirt with a bee or a bird

annetpfeffer · Mar 4, 2013

No, hedgehogs are worse, so I've heard
They'll flirt with a bee or a bird
Their prickles aside

Nymtoc · Mar 4, 2013

No, hedgehogs are worse, so I've heard
They'll flirt with a bee or a bird
Their prickles aside
They'll fart far and wide

Sir_Nigel · Mar 5, 2013

No, hedgehogs are worse, so I've heard
They'll flirt with a bee or a bird
Their prickles aside
They'll fart far and wide
but deny that it ever occurred.

He drowned in the cold minestrone

Nymtoc · Mar 5, 2013

He drowned in the cold minestrone
In a cut-rate café out at Coney

flyingtart · Mar 5, 2013

He drowned in the cold minestrone
In a cut-rate café out at Coney
The Godfather said

Sir_Nigel · Mar 5, 2013

He drowned in the cold minestrone
In a cut-rate café out at Coney
The Godfather said
'I'll have his bread'

annetpfeffer · Mar 5, 2013

He drowned in the cold minestrone
In a cut-rate café out at Coney
The Godfather said
'I'll have his bread'
Said the hit man, "I'll take his baloney."

His clothing of choice was a kilt

kenthepen · Mar 5, 2013

His clothing of choice was a kilt
But his legs jerked when whiskey was spilt

flyingtart · Mar 5, 2013

His clothing of choice was a kilt
But his legs jerked when whiskey was spilt
Kilt shot in the air

annetpfeffer · Mar 5, 2013

His clothing of choice was a kilt
But his legs jerked when whiskey was spilt
Kilt shot in the air
Underneath he was bare

Nymtoc · Mar 5, 2013

His clothing of choice was a kilt
But his legs jerked when whiskey was spilt
Kilt shot in the air
Underneath he was bare
And, embarrassed, he started to wilt.

I hate cars. A horse shall I ride!

iLion · Mar 5, 2013

I hate cars. A horse shall I ride!
Ass in saddle... no one at my side.

Limericks Still Live!

...

Warning: may contain humour.

Benefactor Member

practical experience, FTW

Warning: may contain humour.

Warning: may contain humour.

Benefactor Member

practical experience, FTW

Warning: may contain humour.

practical experience, FTW

Benefactor Member

aka Dylan di Vilde

Benefactor Member

Warning: may contain humour.

aka Dylan di Vilde

practical experience, FTW

Warning: may contain humour.

practical experience, FTW

Benefactor Member

Why do I say these things?