Limericks Still Live!

Fruitbat

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There once was a tyrant named Kim
Whose prospects of marriage were slim.
He called Trump for advice
(After all--he's wed thrice)
Covfefe, Trump said. Grab 'em by the qwim.


There once was a painter named Dave
 
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Nymtoc

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There once was a painter named Dave
Who raffishly would misbehave

 

Fruitbat

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There once was a painter named Dave
Who raffishly would misbehave
He painted his brother
 

CDSinex

Imagine something clever here.
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There once was a painter named Dave
Who raffishly would misbehave
He painted his brother,
which upset their mother
 

Fruitbat

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There once was a painter named Dave
Who raffishly would misbehave
He painted his brother,
which upset their mother
To her, a pink mustache he gave
 

Fruitbat

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There once was a painter named Dave
Who raffishly would misbehave
He painted his brother,
which upset their mother
To her, a pink mustache he gave

CDSinex was stuck in a tree
 

Nymtoc

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CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"
 

Fruitbat

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CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"
He tried to fly down
 

Lavern08

Sit Down, and Shut Up!
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CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"
He tried to fly down

Then said with a frown
 

Nymtoc

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CDSinex was stuck in a tree,
Saying, "What'll I do? Woe is me!"
He tried to fly down

Then said with a frown,
"Well, at least I got acorns for free."

Lavern likes to dance while she sings
 

Lavern08

Sit Down, and Shut Up!
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Lavern likes to dance while she sings
She also likes lavender things
 

Fruitbat

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Lavern likes to dance while she sings
She also likes lavender things
In her purple tutu and cape
 

CDSinex

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Lavern likes to dance while she sings
She also likes lavender things
In her purple tutu and cape,
looking just like a grape
 

Fruitbat

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Lavern likes to dance while she sings
She also likes lavender things
In her purple tutu and cape,
looking just like a grape
She stars on the stage in Hot Springs

There once was a plumber named Frank
 

Nymtoc

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There once was a plumber named Frank
Who did his best work when he drank
 

Fruitbat

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There once was a plumber named Frank
Who did his best work when he drank
Or so he believed
 

Nymtoc

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There once was a plumber named Frank
Who did his best work when he drank
Or so he believed
Until all the peeved
 

Fruitbat

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There once was a plumber named Frank
Who did his best work when he drank
Or so he believed
Until all the peeved
Threw him in a septic tank


There once was a copper named Bick

 
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Nymtoc

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There once was a copper named Bick,
who on Fridays would call in sick
He put me in jail
Where I pen this sad tale
 

Mary Mitchell

Go down road, go pub.
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There once was a copper named Bick,
who on Fridays would call in sick
He put me in jail
Where I pen this sad tale
While he plays "Freedom Fridays", that pr**k.

A dog and a cat can't be friends?
 

Nymtoc

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A dog and a cat can't be friends.
We all know how that thing ends.
Fur flies through the air
 

CDSinex

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A dog and a cat can't be friends.
We all know how that thing ends.

Fur flies through the air,
just like a nightmare.