Hey guys, thanks so much for all your comments. So many good points and suggestions. I'll try to answer as many as I can - you guys are great
Also, if you decide to go with the male POV, I would suggest popping into the erotica forum. IIRC, there is a thread in the protected section about questions to the male writers on the board
Thanks IPTS - I've popped my head into the erotica forum once or twice, but it doesn't interest me that much. The scene I'm talking about isn't erotica, but I think it is important to show the sex scene as part of the development of their relationship.
I'll check out the questions to male writers though, as that sounds useful. Thanks
Seriously though, people watching is great for writing.
Thanks for the advice! I did sneak into my neighbours' bedroom once when I heard them having sex, got out my notebook and told them not to mind me, just carry on and pretend I wasn't there. Oddyly enough, didn't go down too well....
But I would try one scene out for fun anyway, stretch yourself. You may find a diamond in the rough. ^_^
I have tried writing the scene from his POV once, but it went somewhere COMPLETELY unexpected and made me blush. It also made him look like a jerk. Maybe I think all men are jerks? Hehe, not really. I've just probably shagged a bunch of jerks - LOL!
I alternate them in mine, because each brings something different to it. If you go for thecmale perspective have you a male beta who can look at it?
I was about to say no, but then I remembered that I do have a male friend who has read my first few chapters, and is asking for the next. I haven't sent it to him yet because it's where the romance subplot gets going, and I'm a bit... embarrassed....
He's like, a lawyer though, so I'm also a bit worried he'd be going through and looking for loopholes and illegalities
Also read books with scenes from a man's POV.
Oooh, now that is a good suggestion. Can't think of that many books I've read with a male POV sex scene. Know any?
And preferrably hetro, so I don't accidentally have my MC fantasising about his brother in law while he's supposed to be boinking the poor slave girl
In all seriousness, I think what a guy is thinking about in this case may not be all that different from what a woman thinks about. And what he's thinking about may vary depending on his level of interest/commitment with the woman, whether he's prone to performance anxiety, how long it's been since he last had any, what's going on in his life outside of the romance, etc., etc.
Thanks for that, Jeff. I guess I know my MC's thoughts when it comes to his wife, but I've never really disentangled his exact feelings and anxieties when it comes to his One True Love[SUP]TM[/SUP].
He's just spent a week away from her, in which time he's come to realise he can't stop thinking about her. Part of it is unresolved sexual tension, because he was just about to get it on with her when he got interrupted by the urgent message that called him away. But something else happens when he gets back that makes him reevaluate his feelings - she dances naked at his welcome home banquet, and instead of being aroused he is mad as hell. He drags her out and sends her to her room. When he comes back to the banquet, one of his guests makes a lewd comment about her, and he nearly takes the guy's head off. The scene I'm writing occurs later, when he calls her to his room to have it out with her.
I guess there are a lot of complex feelings going on in his head, and I find it easier to describe the way he acts on them from her POV rather than to try and make sense of them from his POV. Does you know what I mean?
Men, like women, are concerned with the basics: happiness, security, health, and finding love. Men aren't all "slam, bam, thank you, Ma'am" jerks.
Hehe, I know. My MMC's motivation in the subplot is finding a woman who makes him happy because his wife is a harridan (in his eyes).
Some men make their primary goal in lovemaking to maximize the pleasure of their partner. Other men are selfish in that regard. But the same can be said of women. Some people of either gender are experienced, and some are inexperienced, which can create anything from comfort to awkwardness.
Yep, too true. In this case I have a 28 year old uber macho male MC who has been bedding women left right and centre whenever he pleases, being as selfish as he likes, and an inexperienced girl of 16. He feels very possessive and protective towards her, and is drawn to her innocence and artlessness. I guess I have a bit of a Mr Rochester/Jane Eyre set up going...
If he has any specific hang-ups, they can impact his mental state in the bedroom.
I guess I never thought about this, but... if her innocence is the thing that draws him to her, could he be worried that bedding her will ruin the quality he finds so attractive? Or maybe that's the aim - bed her, get it out of his system, move on. Stop letting her mess up his head.
Obviously doesn't work though
On the other hand, since making love is one of the most intense emotional activities going, you have the opportunity to introduce new challenges to that character through the level of intimacy he perceives and the level of intimacy he is able to give.
This, I think, is where I'm struggling. Somehow I can't seem to shake the idea that male intimacy = soppy, and this is inconsistent with his uber macho character. I think I use the female POV as a way of putting up a wall around his thoughts, so I don't have to deal with them and he can still appear macho, lol
I show the scene from the perspective of the character for whom the act holds the most character-development significance, and I try to alternate characters through the story, unless the character development and plot make it important to show the other side.
Hmm. I think they're both important, but for her this romance is kinda the main plot, whereas to him its a subplot. He has other things to deal with in the story, and his feelings for her are just a distraction - the significance being that they distract him so much he drops the ball in the main plot
hmmm.
As for guys... they are people too. They feel tenderness, protectiveness, affection, same as we do. They also enjoy the mechanics of making a woman respond, so I put in more of his actions and her reactions.
Lol, yes, I'm ok with the technical actions part
This sex scene is the first time in a while he's actually been bothered about the woman's pleasure, because he's used to being with experienced girls who know what he likes, but this one is.... *gasp*.... a virgin. I guess there is a whole new text book on how guys behave when they know it's their partner's first time, huh?
Just doing the FMC will actually alienate the female readers, im sure they would like to read from the MMC pov.
Wow, really? Coz I've found the opposite to be true - most women are fine with it all being from her POV, but the few men who've read the story want more of the male's perspective.