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Thread: seeking advice conservative talks about addiction!

  1. #1
    figuring it all out !MeMa!'s Avatar
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    Exclamation seeking advice conservative talks about addiction!

    hi all,



    first, am gonna have to say I don't know which section to put this thread on, but i hope i put in the right place



    I'm really facing a hard time convincing others with my novel idea i.e people around me.



    the thing is am a very conservative person. i live in addiction free environment. and it's not acceptable to talk about any kind of addiction around me. personally i don't drink, some or take drags tanks to god. in my country it's not acceptable for girls to get addicted on something, but it's acceptable for guys to smoke only



    in a nutshell, my novel basically talks about a girl who is addicted to something, but she decides to change and go to rehab and the rest of novel talks about her lost love and the struggle of getting totally sober and getting the inner peace.



    i know it's acceptable to talk about addiction in certain countries\community, plus i understand it's fiction, but the problem is am afraid of the reaction of people in my community. deep inside sometimes I think this novel will start a war and everybody will be against me\it!



    for this reason am afraid to complete it. and sometime I said to myself am gonna publish it under a hidden name.



    i hope what i want to say is making sense plus i hope to get good advice.



    thanks in advance
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  2. #2
    volitare nequeo AW Moderator veinglory's Avatar
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    I think it is a challenge to write an insightful book on something you have not experienced and cannot openly discuss. But if that is what you are moved to do, do it. Just start by realizing that no one "chooses" to be addicted. It is an involuntary process. It also most likely occurs in all communities of any significant size, but in some it is hidden and never discussed.

  3. #3
    Keeper of Fort Blanket L.C. Blackwell's Avatar
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    Looking at your location, I see your problem. This is not going to be an easy decision or process for you.

    Provided you feel your physical safety is not at risk (in case you are ever exposed by your real name), I would say a pen name is probably a good choice. You aren't likely to get a lot of support from your friends or community, which means that publishing under a different name could help you preserve relationships that are important to you.

    I do wish you all the best--and suggest that if you mean to tackle a difficult and unfamiliar topic, that you make a LOT of use of internet resources for research. That includes blogs, chat rooms, academic publications, etc.
    I am sometimes here. You can also find me at: First They Came for the Communists, a human rights blog.

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  4. #4
    is watching you via her avatar jjdebenedictis's Avatar
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    Writers often want to write about subjects that their families won't approve of, so doing this under a false name (also called a "pen name" or "pseudonym") is quite normal.

    You'll be able to write a braver book if you're not afraid of what others will think of you afterward, so good luck with it!
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  5. #5
    practical experience, FTW rwm4768's Avatar
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    I think you should go with a pseudonym, or pen name. Seeing where you're from, I can understand that some topics might be off limits. As long as you feel safe doing so, write the book. Your family and friends might never know, but that's not that important. Do what feels right.

  6. #6
    Retired Illuminatus dangerousbill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by !MeMa! View Post
    I'm really facing a hard time convincing others with my novel idea i.e people around me.
    Is it against the law to write certain stories in Oman? Or is it the force of custom or religious authority?

    If you feel that you will not get in personal danger writing your novel, you should write it. But do not discuss it with others, because it will drain away your creative force. When the novel has reached a point where you are satisfied with it, you can show it to other writers. Not family or close friends who are not writers. They will not understand.
    Dangerous Bill

    'Lessons for a Dominant Woman' - A woman's journey, breaking out of the abused wife trap to enslaving her college professor. Romantic realistic femdom. A prequel to 'Lessons at the Edge' CAUTION: Explicit, 18+
    http://www.amazon.com/Lessons-Domina...=william+gaius

  7. #7
    Getting back to writing... MsDashwood's Avatar
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    Addiction is a very, very complex matter. If you are not familiar with the problem either personally or has lived with it for years in your family or with other close ones, it will take you a long time to research and understand everything well enough to write about it in an insightful way.
    "I'm not at all in a humour for writing; I must write on till I am."
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  8. #8
    figuring it all out !MeMa!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by veinglory View Post
    I think it is a challenge to write an insightful book on something you have not experienced and cannot openly discuss. But if that is what you are moved to do, do it. Just start by realizing that no one "chooses" to be addicted. It is an involuntary process. It also most likely occurs in all communities of any significant size, but in some it is hidden and never discussed.
    i totally agree with you. it's a challenge to write something i never experienced and that's what i love about it , but i done my part of searching and i meant to discuss what are the reasons behind her addiction problem.

    thanks for the advice i appreciate it

    Quote Originally Posted by L.C. Blackwell View Post
    Looking at your location, I see your problem. This is not going to be an easy decision or process for you.

    Provided you feel your physical safety is not at risk (in case you are ever exposed by your real name), I would say a pen name is probably a good choice. You aren't likely to get a lot of support from your friends or community, which means that publishing under a different name could help you preserve relationships that are important to you.

    I do wish you all the best--and suggest that if you mean to tackle a difficult and unfamiliar topic, that you make a LOT of use of internet resources for research. That includes blogs, chat rooms, academic publications, etc.
    thanks for the advice i appreciate it
    my physical safety is not at risk thank God and my friends are being very supportive for some reason . they support the writing part however they don't know what am working on. i guess what am afraid of is they will be shocked about my thoughts and they will questioning my believes ect....

    thanks for your wishes and also thanks for the chat room idea


    Quote Originally Posted by jjdebenedictis View Post
    Writers often want to write about subjects that their families won't approve of, so doing this under a false name (also called a "pen name" or "pseudonym") is quite normal.

    You'll be able to write a braver book if you're not afraid of what others will think of you afterward, so good luck with it!
    thanks for the advice i appreciate it
    i have a very supportive family. the thing is i'm a very descriptive about what am working on. i didn't want to cause to them any shock


    Quote Originally Posted by rwm4768 View Post
    I think you should go with a pseudonym, or pen name. Seeing where you're from, I can understand that some topics might be off limits. As long as you feel safe doing so, write the book. Your family and friends might never know, but that's not that important. Do what feels right.
    thanks for the advice i appreciate it
    i agree with you it could be off limit topic, but my novel setting is in New York and am writing it in english not my first tongue,i feel am writing with alot of courage and confidence if i do so.
    now am pretty convincing about a pseudonym

    Quote Originally Posted by MsDashwood View Post
    Addiction is a very, very complex matter. If you are not familiar with the problem either personally or has lived with it for years in your family or with other close ones, it will take you a long time to research and understand everything well enough to write about it in an insightful way.
    no i didn't experienced addiction nor anyone in my family as well, but i done my share of searching and i think i got the whole idea and i read psychology book to get deep inside to the addicted person mind

    thanks for the advice i appreciate it
    if you want to make a difference in life, EDUCATE A CHILD

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  9. #9
    figuring it all out !MeMa!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dangerousbill View Post
    Is it against the law to write certain stories in Oman? Or is it the force of custom or religious authority?

    If you feel that you will not get in personal danger writing your novel, you should write it. But do not discuss it with others, because it will drain away your creative force. When the novel has reached a point where you are satisfied with it, you can show it to other writers. Not family or close friends who are not writers. They will not understand.
    no it's not against the law not it's not a religious taboo to talk about this stuff. it's just not a preferable topic to discuss at loud among community members.
    i just don't people think different about me that's it
    if you want to make a difference in life, EDUCATE A CHILD

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  10. #10
    Keeper of Fort Blanket L.C. Blackwell's Avatar
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    So many times, the reaction to a controversial topic depends on how you write about it. For instance, in your story, it doesn't sound like you ever show drug addiction as a good thing. Your character loses love, loses many things, and has to earn a new life.

    If you were writing a book that was ambiguous about addiction, or glorified it, then I would expect a much more negative reaction. However, this is not the case.

    Maybe now is not the time to try to explain too much of your book to friends and family. Once you've written it, though, you may find they're more accepting than you expected.

    Hint: trying to explain too much too early can be very awkward. My present book includes not-so-nice things like betrayal, revenge, torture and killing, but in fact it's a literary novel that deals with some of the darkest parts of Soviet Russian history.

    If you say, "My book is about a drug addict," well, maybe that raises a few questions.

    On the other hand, "my book is about a girl who makes a terrible mistake and has to earn redemption," is a different story.
    I am sometimes here. You can also find me at: First They Came for the Communists, a human rights blog.

    "We are plain quiet folk and have no use for adventures. Nasty disturbing uncomfortable things! Make you late for dinner! I can't think what anybody sees in them.

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  11. #11
    bushed Bushrat's Avatar
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    Good for you to write what you want to write about You're right, the beauty of writing is that it lets you explore things that are foreign to you by slipping into a character's skin. You don't need to have experienced all the things you write about; otherwise, lots of writers would have to first commit murders, rape and steal before sitting down to write their book

    As far as people in your wider community being against the topic of your book--if it causes serious problems for you, then just don't mention it and use a pseudonym for your book.
    I don't talk much about my books either, not because of potential backslash but because only one of my friends is a writer. I don't want to bore people with the ins and outs of what I'm writing, so I use internet forums such as this one for it instead of "real people".

    Good luck with your novel!

  12. #12
    figuring it all out !MeMa!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by L.C. Blackwell View Post
    So many times, the reaction to a controversial topic depends on how you write about it. For instance, in your story, it doesn't sound like you ever show drug addiction as a good thing. Your character loses love, loses many things, and has to earn a new life.

    If you were writing a book that was ambiguous about addiction, or glorified it, then I would expect a much more negative reaction. However, this is not the case.

    Maybe now is not the time to try to explain too much of your book to friends and family. Once you've written it, though, you may find they're more accepting than you expected.

    Hint: trying to explain too much too early can be very awkward. My present book includes not-so-nice things like betrayal, revenge, torture and killing, but in fact it's a literary novel that deals with some of the darkest parts of Soviet Russian history.

    If you say, "My book is about a drug addict," well, maybe that raises a few questions.

    On the other hand, "my book is about a girl who makes a terrible mistake and has to earn redemption," is a different story.
    i literary will consider your notes while am writting. thank you very much and i hope all the best for you

    Quote Originally Posted by Bushrat View Post
    Good for you to write what you want to write about You're right, the beauty of writing is that it lets you explore things that are foreign to you by slipping into a character's skin. You don't need to have experienced all the things you write about; otherwise, lots of writers would have to first commit murders, rape and steal before sitting down to write their book

    As far as people in your wider community being against the topic of your book--if it causes serious problems for you, then just don't mention it and use a pseudonym for your book.
    I don't talk much about my books either, not because of potential backslash but because only one of my friends is a writer. I don't want to bore people with the ins and outs of what I'm writing, so I use internet forums such as this one for it instead of "real people".


    Good luck with your novel!

    you're totally right. as A.Einstein said "Logic will get you from A to B. Imagination will take you everywhere" and
    i really think that i'll go with a pen name.
    thanks for your wishing and i wish all the luck for you too.
    if you want to make a difference in life, EDUCATE A CHILD

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  13. #13
    Your Genial Uncle Absolute Sage James D. Macdonald's Avatar
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    What language will you be writing in, and how do you intend to publish your work?

    My advice: Write your novel. Make it the best you can. See what you want to do with it after it's finished.

  14. #14
    figuring it all out !MeMa!'s Avatar
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    am writing it in english and the set of my novel is New York and i intend to publishing it mostly in west countries i.e. europe or maybe U.S and.
    i know it's difficult task, but i intend to write to a literary agent after i finish it and edit it, well hopefully.

    i'll do my best
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  15. #15
    I want to make my brother shave Wardeth's Avatar
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    You sound like you're on the right track. As somone who's had a few addictions let me say that alot of the time we are driven by fear. Our addiction is the cause and solution to sooo many of our problems and we justify what we can when we can. Get your thoughts into writing and don't let your friends or family read it. Post it here and let the literary culture judge it.

  16. #16
    figuring it all out !MeMa!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wardeth View Post
    You sound like you're on the right track. As somone who's had a few addictions let me say that alot of the time we are driven by fear. Our addiction is the cause and solution to sooo many of our problems and we justify what we can when we can. Get your thoughts into writing and don't let your friends or family read it. Post it here and let the literary culture judge it.
    thanks for the advice


    happy holidays
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  17. #17
    @LeaveItToIan IDGS's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MsDashwood View Post
    Addiction is a very, very complex matter. If you are not familiar with the problem either personally or has lived with it for years in your family or with other close ones, it will take you a long time to research and understand everything well enough to write about it in an insightful way.
    I'm going to go ahead and say that if someone hasn't lived with it personally - either themselves or a close family member - addiction is virtually impossible to portray accurately.

    Exceptions to every rule, of course - but just thought I'd show some support for your point.


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