Urgh, that attitude drives me crazy with it's sexist implications. It's fine if the character likes other dudes, but god forbid he not act like proper man while he's doing it. Because of course the worse thing for a man to be is like a woman.

On the one hand, it's true that the effeminate gay man is something of a stereotype, but on the other hand, there certainly are men, gay and straight, who are effeminate or possess traits associated more with women, and they deserve to be represented in fiction too, and not as a punchline.

I have a male character I'm working on who would be considered extremely effeminate by most cultural standards, and I just know I'm going to get crap from people about how I should "just make him a girl". Demons are one thing, but men who defy gender norms?! That just kills my suspension of disbelief.