what do you think of my cover?

robertbevan

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my brother in law just photoshopped up my idea for my book cover. what do you think?

without looking back at my posting history, what sort of book do you think this is?

any comments or suggestions would be appreciated. thank you.

criticalfailures.jpg
 
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angeluscado

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I like it - it's simple. Looks pretty professional. Judging by just the D20 on the cover, I'd probably think it had something to do with D&D or some other paper-and-pen RPG. The "critical" in the title reminds me of "critical hit", which ties in with the D20.
 

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I took it to be something related to a CIA type of thing.
 

leahzero

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fadeaccompli

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The picture is great! Nicely shot and framed.

The font doesn't look professional. Mind, it doesn't look bad, either; but it does say "this was not put out by a major press" immediately on seeing it. Unfortunately, I'm not enough of a graphic designer to identify why. It may just be that the font used is a very standard one, used for amateur purposes a lot.
 

Nonuw

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I like the cover - the black and white, serious - with numbers. Actually, it reminds me of a legalese drama - set in a court-room, or a board-room.

One suggestion - the Title and the name of the author, and the numbers - all have the same font and size - can your bil change up the font size (give the title a larger size than the author's name, and the numbers could be a diff font and size)? The number 20 really pops out - if it's not significant in the story, can he gray it out a bit, make it more transparent - it competes for our attention with the title and author's name. Just some immediate reactions...
 

robertbevan

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I think if it's a critical failure, the die should be on the 1, not the 20. But yeah, I definitely think of D&D.

yes, you are absolutely right. i was thinking about that last night when we took the picture... wondering whether i should go with "1" or "20".

i went with "20" because i worried that with so much of the die shaded out into the background, it might not be obvious that it's a 20 sided die. but looking at the picture again, i think enough sides are visible for it to be obvious.

i'm going to try the picture again tonight to see what it looks like with the "1" facing forward.


my other concern is that it's too dark. the book itself is a comedy/fantasy, and though it's peppered here and there with moments of darkness, on the whole it's pretty light.

but i think i'm going to stick with this idea for a cover because 1. i think it looks really cool, and 2. my only other idea wouldn't look as cool, and would be really hard to pull off.

thank you everyone for taking the time to post.
 

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My automatic thought is that it has to do with gaming (although it should be on a one, and not a critical success 20). However, nothing else about the cover makes me think gaming, and I'm not sure what aspect it would refer to. Also, if it is about gaming, I don't know how many people outside of gamers would get the reference (maybe a subtitle would help?)

I would say that if its supposed to be comedy, the dark cover makes me think more serious. Perhaps you could add some sort of fantasy element to it.
 

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I'd be grateful if the OP could please reduce the size of the image: guidelines are here.

You'll have to use image-editing software to resize it, and then edit your post to delete the original image and upload the smaller one. Thank you.
 

robertbevan

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thanks for the responses, everyone. most of you hit the nail on the head that it's about a D&Dish sort of game. (it's not actually D&D though, because i don't know the rules about copyright infringement regarding that, and having a fictional version of the game allowed me to tweak some of the minor rules just a bit to better fit the story)

biggest problem so far (which i recognized would be a problem when i had this idea for the cover) is the dark tone. the story is actually comic fantasy. it's about a group of guys who piss off their new game master, and he magically sends them into the fantasy world in the bodies of their fantasy characters. the black twenty-sided die is the vehicle i used for the portal. magic dice.

and while there are some dark moments, the overall tone of the book is meant to be pretty light.

but dammit i really like this cover. i even kind of like the dark tone of it. what i'm hoping for is for rpg geeks to spot the die on the cover, then recognize the reference in the title, and be interested enough to give it a shot. and then when they start reading, they think "whoa... this is totally not what i was expecting, but it really kicks some ass."... and then tell all of their geek friends about it at their next gaming session.

too much to hope for?
 

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thanks for the responses, everyone. most of you hit the nail on the head that it's about a D&Dish sort of game. (it's not actually D&D though, because i don't know the rules about copyright infringement regarding that, and having a fictional version of the game allowed me to tweak some of the minor rules just a bit to better fit the story)

biggest problem so far (which i recognized would be a problem when i had this idea for the cover) is the dark tone. the story is actually comic fantasy. it's about a group of guys who piss off their new game master, and he magically sends them into the fantasy world in the bodies of their fantasy characters. the black twenty-sided die is the vehicle i used for the portal. magic dice.

and while there are some dark moments, the overall tone of the book is meant to be pretty light.

but dammit i really like this cover. i even kind of like the dark tone of it. what i'm hoping for is for rpg geeks to spot the die on the cover, then recognize the reference in the title, and be interested enough to give it a shot. and then when they start reading, they think "whoa... this is totally not what i was expecting, but it really kicks some ass."... and then tell all of their geek friends about it at their next gaming session.

too much to hope for?


I don't know that it's too much to hope for. Other than the 1 vs. 20 difference ;) It certainly catches my eye, and would cause me to pick it up. Knowing a d20 is kind of like knowing a secret handshake, y'know? Also, you might want to read the "Guardians of the Flame" series by Joel Rosenberg (first book The Sleeping Dragon) which has players of a D&D sort of game transported into their game world. I'm sure there are others; I did enjoy the Rosenberg ones I could get my hands on.

So far as copyright infringement goes, version 3.5 of D&D was also the advent of the Open Gaming License, which allowed people to create monsters, settings, adventure paths, etc. using the D&D rules. They had a form that you used to submit to them, easy peasy. I think Pathfinder (D&D's inheritor, as far as my table is concerned) operates in a similar fashion, while 4th edition...well, let's just not talk about 4th edition.
 

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I'd definitely change the die from 20 to 1 if you're specifically aiming for the geek crowd. Because if they see the title, but then a natural 20, they're gonna think "The author got the title and the picture wrong, he doesn't know what he's talking about!" and maybe ignore you.

Also, if it's a comedy, why not have the background be white? It'd make the black die pop out more and maybe not have people think that what they're about to read is going to be really grim and brooding.
 

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my other concern is that it's too dark. the book itself is a comedy/fantasy, and though it's peppered here and there with moments of darkness, on the whole it's pretty light.

I never would've guessed or even thought that the book was comedy, or fantasy, judging by its overtly "serious" cover.

Maybe try making the "F" in "failure" backwards, or tilted or disolving? Or having the "L" in "critical" dropping or shooting up like a rocket?

Something fun with a letter or two in the main title to give the casual looker/observer an idea that the contents of the book are not as "dark" as the cover makes them out to be.

The artwork is cool, but it is only one component of your overall visual. Maybe think about playing with the title in ways like misspelling it two, three, four times--making fun of the "failure" concept and have the misspelled titles smaller, in all different fonts and faded in the background with the final title full tilt boogie bold and in the forefront, but still with maybe a letter backwards or leaning or dropping.

Covers set expectations for the reader, so start managing their expectations at the first glance.
 

Justin_AC

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JDK, those are really good suggestions. Just a simple touch like makes 2-3 of the letters different colors would lend and air of comedy to the otherwise grim and serious cover. If I wasn't familiar with RPGs, I'd think I was looking at the cover of a very dark, serious, not-fun book.
 

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sorry!

is that better?

Much better. Thank you!

... it's about a D&Dish sort of game. (it's not actually D&D though, because i don't know the rules about copyright infringement regarding that, and having a fictional version of the game allowed me to tweak some of the minor rules just a bit to better fit the story)

It doesn't matter if your game is the real D&D or a fictional version of it: if it's still recognisable as D&D or is an obvious derivative of it, you might have some problems.

Please check the laws of copyright before you proceed with publication, or you might get yourself into serious legal trouble. I know I'm being nitpicky here, but you'd be far better off to make sure you're safe before you put the book out there.
 

robertbevan

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It doesn't matter if your game is the real D&D or a fictional version of it: if it's still recognisable as D&D or is an obvious derivative of it, you might have some problems.

Please check the laws of copyright before you proceed with publication, or you might get yourself into serious legal trouble. I know I'm being nitpicky here, but you'd be far better off to make sure you're safe before you put the book out there.

oh it's recognizable as D&D alright. is there a forum on here to ask questions about these kinds of concerns. i'm also concerned because the premise is nearly identical to a 2011 short film somoeone made called "the dungeon master".

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EWesKW2uO-8

a friend of mine showed me that trailer while i was writing my first chapter. i know you can't copyright a premise, and the stories are different enough (from what i can tell of the trailer), but doing some research on it, i found that one of the characters has the same name as mine. cooper. purely coincidental. an easy enough fix is to go ahead and change his name to something else, but i really like that name for that character.

thank you again, everyone, for all the advice.
 

Old Hack

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oh it's recognizable as D&D alright. is there a forum on here to ask questions about these kinds of concerns.

You're welcome to take a look around AW and see if you can find appropriate threads here, but you have to do your own research. Bear in mind that if you do go ahead and publish it based on advice you've received from people you don't know on an internet discussion forum and problems follow, you're going to find yourself on shaky ground. Your best bet is to read up on the subject using authoritative and qualified primary sources and if you're still not 100% sure, take proper legal advice.
 

Justin_AC

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Some copyright lawyers will talk to you on an hourly basis for very affordable rates, but really, unless you're ripping D&D off wholesale and selling that game system as your own, you shouldn't freak out too much.

Terms like "natural 20," "bard," "healing spell," and so on are common use and totally safe. Using language specific to ONLY D&D is what'll get you into trouble.
 

Old Hack

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unless you're ripping D&D off wholesale and selling that game system as your own, you shouldn't freak out too much.

Terms like "natural 20," "bard," "healing spell," and so on are common use and totally safe. Using language specific to ONLY D&D is what'll get you into trouble.

That's not the case. Please be careful when you give out advice as if you don't know what you're talking about it might well come back and bite you later.