Teens Writing for Teens, issue 6

Thalia

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The person who said that is a douchebag, Ally. I mean, yes, you will need to find a way to correct the grammar (not saying it's your fault! I know that it is really unfair and you have no control, and I find the fact that you've written SO MANY books despite it really impressive and inspiring!), but I think that (from what I've heard) the story itself is really fascinating and compelling and, with the right marketing strategy (whether it's you or a publishing company behind it) could be hugely successful.

ETA: GAME OF THRONES IS AMAZINGFUCKINGTASTIC.
 

Keagerz

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Ally, maybe you can do what I'm doing right now. Right now I'm simply writing as a coping skill for life. The same with art. I'm a huge perfectionist to the extreme. I will rewrite the same exact sentence 10 times before I decide it's good enough before I even move onto sentence number two. I never get past around 150 words because I generally feel like there's no point in trying if I can't get it perfect.

I'm so jealous of the fact you are able to write even though you know you're grammar is not perfect due to circumstances that are out of your control. Me? I spend an hour agonizing over where to put a comma, or to remove a comma. o_O; So while my grammar is generally okay, I get absolutely nothing done since I discourage myself and delete everything.

So just think, at least you get stuff done. :p I know I can't handle criticism either due to my BPD. They say, "Oh you missed a period between these two sentences." And I hear, "OH MY GOD YOU SUCK AT WRITING YOU FAIL AT LIFE MIGHT AS WELL GO KILL YOURSELF RIGHT NOW."

Oh you silly borderline thinking!

It's times like these where you have to look back on what you've done and tell yourself, "Wow! I've accomplished a lot despite my circumstances!" I know when I finished a short story back in October, it was such a rush because I actually finished something. Of course now I'm ashamed of it, but hey, it's still a miracle I finished something!
 

amlptj

Speling & grammer murderer, Sorrie!
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Tell me about it! Its soooooooo awesome! God i cant wait till Sunday!!!

And Thanks Tally, funny how the thing i usually rant about (grammar issues) wasn't even in that rant. Oddly enough that was my biggest problem and now seems completely insignificant now among all my other ones.

Another really weird and messed up thing today! I got into an actual argument from my professor from hell today and don't feel proud or angry or anything actually. Holy shit i'm not even scared! One month from now the fate of my entire life will be decided by him and frankly i don't even give a shit at this point. Don't really know if that's a good or bad thing right now.
 

amlptj

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Ally, maybe you can do what I'm doing right now. Right now I'm simply writing as a coping skill for life. The same with art. I'm a huge perfectionist to the extreme. I will rewrite the same exact sentence 10 times before I decide it's good enough before I even move onto sentence number two. I never get past around 150 words because I generally feel like there's no point in trying if I can't get it perfect.

I'm so jealous of the fact you are able to write even though you know you're grammar is not perfect due to circumstances that are out of your control. Me? I spend an hour agonizing over where to put a comma, or to remove a comma. o_O; So while my grammar is generally okay, I get absolutely nothing done since I discourage myself and delete everything.

So just think, at least you get stuff done. :p I know I can't handle criticism either due to my BPD. They say, "Oh you missed a period between these two sentences." And I hear, "OH MY GOD YOU SUCK AT WRITING YOU FAIL AT LIFE MIGHT AS WELL GO KILL YOURSELF RIGHT NOW."

Oh you silly borderline thinking!

It's times like these where you have to look back on what you've done and tell yourself, "Wow! I've accomplished a lot despite my circumstances!" I know when I finished a short story back in October, it was such a rush because I actually finished something. Of course now I'm ashamed of it, but hey, it's still a miracle I finished something!

That's what i tried to do with RBSL. I dont write or even really read contemp.... but i felt like writing this story for me. Sadly just joking around i showed my mom some and she was laughing hysterically from it. I got an ego boast and then was like "This book needs to be published too!"

Perfectionist i'm not really. My problem is the constant feeling like i'm a constant nobody that will achieve nothing. The fact i finish something its a nice little joy rush. I have a ritual, where i play this one song (the music at the closing credits of Kingdom Hearts 1) as i'm writing the last lines. Sadly that joy might only last the night. Then i look at all I've done and think "Too bad its never going to go anywhere"

I have these highs and lows. Sometimes I get real motivated. Like "OK you ARE going to get LotF looking and being as awesome as you feel it is" then i'm go on this beta searching kick, have 5 people respond and feel awesome. Then those 5 people dont respond and i get all depressed again.(thankfully i have two now... so i'm a less low then usual) So to cure the depression I'll go back to writing something else. Writing has been my coping mechanism since i started at 11/12. Anyway then i'll be content with writing and feel happy and awesome again. Then usually something happens. (I can handle critiques, finally learned that) but someone will bash my grammar and I'll fall back down to feeling worthless again, or something else will be said to me or i'll even think it myself and it all starts over again.

Sadly as much as i hate to admit it, Will was the only one that helped me through those time. Telling me what an amazing writer i was, and writing me cute little notes like "Freaks will rule the world" or something stupid like or offer to read one and my confidence would be boost.

Then he wouldnt read it and it all started over again. Now with everything with him, school issues literally pushing me off the edge, and my zero self confidence in myself, i dont know how i'm going to bounce back now. Right now i just look at all my books and think "Well if the first book of LotF gets published... the rest wont, hell the first one wont. If i ever finish UZ or RBSL i guess i'll self pub those, but... no one will read them. Then what? Guess i'll work in my crappy lab job... oh wait that's if i graduate. If i don't guess i'll work at McDonald's. Lovely life ahead of me" and now the new thought to add on is "And i'll have to live it alone, awesome! All the kids in gradeschool were right, i'll become a nun or the crazy old cat lady"

ETA: Can you change your therapist? That seems horribly unfair! I'm sorry! I hope you can get everything you want soon!
 
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Keagerz

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I want to, but my mom likes her and therefore won't let me switch. My mom says it would be too much of a hassle to switch psychiatrists at this point as I've been seeing her since I was 11. I mean, my psychiatrist isn't a bad person or even a bad psychiatrist, we just don't click with each other. We're always fighting and disagreeing with what's important for me.

The only thing we ever agreed on was that I needed to get out of my public school and into a specialized school. That was probably the best thing she's ever done for me, and she fought my district school to get me into a special school.
 

amlptj

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That sucks Keag, I hope you can get her to side with you somehow. I mean you know what's most important for you, more then she does.
 

chocowrites

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hi everyone :)

Currently writing a paper, but I'd much rather be writing a short story.
 

amlptj

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So writing and feeling a bit better. Just forced myself to start writing and actually wrote something i think is really funny. Any one want to YAWN so i can share it? Hehehehe
 

amlptj

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How about we start in a minute so at :45, then post at :30. Sound good?
 

Keagerz

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WAIT WE'RE YAWNING. WHEN WHEN WHAT TIME. I FORGOT WHAT THE TIMES MEANT LOL.

I need to write since I've gotten nothing done all day. :C
 

Thalia

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We post in one minute!

(btw hiii, I just randomly decided to joiiiiin. I'll be posting some MAAH edits)
 

Keagerz

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Okay I guess I will post the random scribbling I wrote in like 10 minutes. BAH IT'S SO BAD I'M SO RUSTY OMG. I'm so ashamed. >_>;

I just wrote about my old man 46 year old Native American character meditating. His name is Cody. Huuur. :B He's Native American but has a white boy name.
 

Thalia

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hmmm...

okay!

How about around :30 or :45? Or should we wait all the way 'till the next :00? I'm down with anything.
 

amlptj

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:45 sounds good! That way it gives us 15 mins to read and rep, then start again for another round.
 

Thalia

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I find the books difficult to read, but that's me. The Lord-Of-The-Rings-esque high fantasy genre, with a lot of characters with similar names and a lot of strange archaic-sounding things, is very difficult for me to follow. Hence the reason I couldn't like Inheritance.