Teens Writing for Teens, issue 6

lisalulu09

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That is very good.

Arranging to meet a Potterhead at the end of the month.
 

Parametric

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Airship? Sounds pretty awesome!

It will be! I'm planning a massive airship battle for the end of the book. Protagonist has to sneak aboard the enemy flagship and steal the last piece she needs to get her beaten-up hulk back into the air. Then full-on mid-air battle. Anti-airship gun batteries, smaller ships providing fighter cover, stuff exploding all over the place. It's going to be like a YA steampunk Battlestar Galactica.
 

amlptj

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Interesting question, Ally. My urban fantasy had two viewpoint characters who were always together, so I've encountered the temptation to retell what just happened from the other character's viewpoint. In your case, I would probably incorporate Alex's flashbacks into Alex's narrative (not as separate scenes) and rely on dialogue only for Sam's backstory. That maintains viewpoint discipline while giving the reader the immediacy of a flashback rather than relying on endless talking.

Thank you! That sort of how i was leaning but wasn't sure if it would be much of an emotion given to the reader as i wanted.

It will be! I'm planning a massive airship battle for the end of the book. Protagonist has to sneak aboard the enemy flagship and steal the last piece she needs to get her beaten-up hulk back into the air. Then full-on mid-air battle. Anti-airship gun batteries, smaller ships providing fighter cover, stuff exploding all over the place. It's going to be like a YA steampunk Battlestar Galactica.

SOUND F*&^ING AWESOME! I love explosions! Seriously i try to add them in every one of my books, explosions plus flying ships, sounds even better!!!
 
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lisalulu09

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Guys, could someone explain the difference between a trifold board and a poster board? I'm just a little curious.
 

Parametric

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Thank you! That sort of how i was leaning but wasn't sure if it would be much of an emotion given to the reader as i wanted.

My experience is that the emotional impact on the reader is dependent on the emotional impact on the character. In my urban fantasy the protagonist loses his son in a horrible, horrible scene in the first chapter, and for the rest of the novel, he can't even think about it. I don't think there are ever more than 1-2 lines of actual flashback, because he has such a visceral reaction to the memory that he has to shut it down. (I posted a teaser a few years back, although this version is now out of date. There's very little direct flashback, but I think the emotion comes across.)
 

Thalia

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Trifold board folds three times. Tri-fold.

Poster board is just one surface.

I think, at least.
 

Parametric

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SOUND F*&^ING AWESOME! I love explosions! Seriously i try to add them in every one of my books, explosions plus flying ships, sounds even better!!!

Ah, my target audience. I love explosions too. :tongue
 

Thalia

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I love explosions! That is how I choose movies to watch with my friends!

AT THE MOVIE STORE

FRIEND: So, how about one of these chick flicks?
TALLY: Looks good! How many people die?
FRIEND: Um... well, none.
TALLY: Oh, that sucks. How much blood is there?
FRIEND: ...none.
TALLY: Because they're blowing shit up! Right?
FRIEND: ...maybe we should change sections.

ETA: YES. Especially Unspoken right now. I MEAN HAVE YOU SEEN THAT COVER?
 

Zoombie

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My experience is that the emotional impact on the reader is dependent on the emotional impact on the character. In my urban fantasy the protagonist loses his son in a horrible, horrible scene in the first chapter, and for the rest of the novel, he can't even think about it. I don't think there are ever more than 1-2 lines of actual flashback, because he has such a visceral reaction to the memory that he has to shut it down. (I posted a teaser a few years back, although this version is now out of date. There's very little direct flashback, but I think the emotion comes across.)

God. That scene. It so perfectly set the tone and feel of the entire book that it still creeps me out YEARS later. Seriously, Para, that book was baller to the WALLS...except your guns did seem a bit odd, I remember noting that there was some wuzziness when it comes to gun accuracy when I beta'd it.

Now, airship battles...

THUMBS

FUCKING

UP
 

Thalia

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I should be writing more Sherlockettes, but I'm procrastinating with The Winter Princess.
 

Taylor_Writes

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You could always post another teaser to help get motivated...

... Just joking ;)

And, what is The Winter Princess, if you don't mind me asking?
 

Thalia

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An SNI. I talked about it on the previous pages.

But okay, a snippet! Not a very good one, but I found it fun to write.

“You eat lunch with your house, generally,” said Danielle, next to Sophie, as the girls walked down to the cafeteria. “They only really enforce that for the first month, though. Afterwards, they don’t really care.” Danielle smiled. “We always know when the teachers have stopped paying attention, because Ron stops eating in the caf that day.”

“She can tell that fast?” asked Sophie.

Danielle grinned with pride. “Yup,” she said. “Ron’s freakishly good at deducing stuff.” She turned to the taller girl. “Why don’t you tell Sophie how good you are at that?”

“How about no,” said Veronika.

Danielle rolled her eyes. “Don’t be that way,” she said. “Come on. Sophie doesn’t hate you yet.”

“Lovely,” muttered Veronika.

Danielle turned to Sophie. “She’s not even listening to me,” she whispered. “Watch this.” The girl turned to Veronika and, in the same tone as before, said: “I’m a flying rhinoceros.”

“How quaint,” said Veronika.

Danielle elbowed her. “Stop acting British,” she groaned. She turned to Sophie, and looked down at her tie.

“You’re in Daley?” she asked, studied the red and orange line on the tie. “We’re in Blackwell.” She grinned and pumped her fist in the air. “Blackwell, victorious! Blackwell, charge ahead!”

Veronika examined the blue and green line on her tie. “Blackwell hasn’t won the house cup once in the last ten years,” she said, in a monotone. “Daley has won four times. That means Daley is a more likely—“

“Ron, shut up, and don’t talk ‘till you find some house pride,” interrupted Danielle.
 

Thalia

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I love them too!

Sophie and Veronika shall be great, but they only met the previous day. Just wait until Chapter 8, which in the outline is named "Sophie and Veronika's Sleepover Extraordinaire".
 

Taylor_Writes

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That sounds like it will be an... interesting chapter :)
 

Thalia

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It is.

Meredith (Mycroft) is in it too, because the parents are out on a trip and she's the Authority Figure and it's gonna be hilarious.

SOPHIE: Look at all this stuff you have in your pantry! Do you bake many cakes?
VERONIKA: I know not how to do this 'cake-baking' you speak of.
SOPHIE: Little grasshopper, let me show you the figurative ropes!
MEREDITH: CHILDREN, FEEL MY WRA - chocolate cake? Okay, kiddies, bedtime. I'll - er- clean this up for you.

...except they'll talk like real people, you know.
 

Parametric

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God. That scene. It so perfectly set the tone and feel of the entire book that it still creeps me out YEARS later. Seriously, Para, that book was baller to the WALLS...except your guns did seem a bit odd, I remember noting that there was some wuzziness when it comes to gun accuracy when I beta'd it.

Now, airship battles...

THUMBS

FUCKING

UP

D'aww. Thanks, Zoom. Glad you liked the book. :LilLove:

I'm sure all the gun stuff is hilariously inaccurate. I had to rely on YouTube and Wikipedia. :tongue I was planning to find a gun nut to read it if it ever got picked up, but since the book is dead in the water, I'll save everybody the effort. :rolleyes:
 

Taylor_Writes

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It is.

Meredith (Mycroft) is in it too, because the parents are out on a trip and she's the Authority Figure and it's gonna be hilarious.

SOPHIE: Look at all this stuff you have in your pantry! Do you bake many cakes?
VERONIKA: I know not how to do this 'cake-baking' you speak of.
SOPHIE: Little grasshopper, let me show you the figurative ropes!
MEREDITH: CHILDREN, FEEL MY WRA - chocolate cake? Okay, kiddies, bedtime. I'll - er- clean this up for you.

...except they'll talk like real people, you know.

You used Meredith :D Yay :)
 

Taylor_Writes

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This is my third time writing the rough outline of this book, and I don't know how I'm going to do this... Hmm...