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Thread: Comedy Cabaret--2012 Road Trip

  1. #11476
    coy koi swachski's Avatar
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    Cass, there's a coma missing above your avie.
    .
    .
    .



    Quote Originally Posted by Angie View Post
    You're a ray of sunshine in a dark and dreary world, swach.



    Into every life crap will fall. — Anne Lamott


    Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. — Mark Twain

  2. #11477
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by swachski View Post
    Cass, there's a coma missing above your avie.
    What the --? Annggie must have tinkered with it while I was in a comma this afternoon.
    Quote Originally Posted by robeiae
    Sometimes you're no fun at all.

  3. #11478
    nurturing tomorrows criminals today PorterStarrByrd's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kayleamay View Post
    Hasn't anyone righted poor Cray yet? Pretty soon he's going to start pooping rainbows! Oh, teh horror.

    We been posting a position for someone who could do that for several years ... no takers
    http://porterstarrbyrd.blogspot.com/


    We have met the enemy and he is us - Pogo
    The reason I spend so much time out of the box is that somebody crapped in it - Porter Starr Byrd
    Yield to temptation, it may never come again - unknown

  4. #11479
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PorterStarrByrd View Post
    We been posting a position for someone who could do that for several years ... no takers
    post...tee hee

    position...tee hee hee


    Yeah. I miss Cray, too.
    Quote Originally Posted by robeiae
    Sometimes you're no fun at all.

  5. #11480
    nurturing tomorrows criminals today PorterStarrByrd's Avatar
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    miss ... tee hee
    http://porterstarrbyrd.blogspot.com/


    We have met the enemy and he is us - Pogo
    The reason I spend so much time out of the box is that somebody crapped in it - Porter Starr Byrd
    Yield to temptation, it may never come again - unknown

  6. #11481
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PorterStarrByrd View Post
    miss ... tee hee
    You're confusing PD.
    Quote Originally Posted by robeiae
    Sometimes you're no fun at all.

  7. #11482
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KellyAssauer View Post
    Wow. Your voice is really low for a gurl...

    What about a boy named Sue?
    Quote Originally Posted by robeiae
    Sometimes you're no fun at all.

  8. #11483
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KellyAssauer View Post
    *smokes some coffee*

    Attorney's kid?

    Psst. Don't tell anyone. I'm a lawyer.

  9. #11484
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Which reminds me. I'm suing all of you for sexual harassment.

    *founces to court*

  10. #11485
    I'm on the phone. kayleamay's Avatar
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    If she makes her way to the judges chambers, y'all are screwed.









    And the judge probably will be too. Tee hee!
    "I never said, 'I could write.' I said, 'I could, right?'."

    Hushpuppy: "When it all goes quiet behind my eyes, I see everything that made me flying around in invisible pieces. When I look too hard it goes away. And when it all goes quiet, I see they are right here. I see that I'm a little piece of a big, big universe and that makes things right. When I die, the scientists of the future, they're gonna find it all. They're gonna know, once there was a Hushpuppy and she lived with her daddy in the bathtub." ~ Beasts of the Southern Wild

  11. #11486
    Great chieftain o the puddin'-race SuperModerator Haggis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CassandraW View Post

    Psst. Don't tell anyone. I'm a lawyer.
    You really are my ex, ain't you?
    Quote Originally Posted by swachski View Post
    Thanks for all your hard work, Haggis! You are the best mod ever!

    Stewie the Chihuey
    featuring the lovely and talented



  12. #11487
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kayleamay View Post
    If she makes her way to the judges chambers, y'all are screwed.









    And the judge probably will be too. Tee hee!
    I saw that! I saw that!

    *edits legal brief to add new claim against Kayleamay*

    tee hee...screwed


    Quote Originally Posted by Haggis View Post
    You really are my ex, ain't you?
    *files claim for back alimony and demon spawn support*

  13. #11488
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KellyAssauer View Post
    Wait... I was never harassed...

    *haz sad* =(
    Hmmm... discrimination?

    *scans federal and state laws*

    race... no. national origin... no. religion... no. age... doubt it. gender...prolly not.

    *researches whether any court has ever ruled that being a doll is a disability*

    Nope. Sorry. No grounds for a discrimination case. Try being more of a hussy. Worked for Cella.

  14. #11489
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KellyAssauer View Post
    Could you explain 'hussy' to me?
    *sigh* Porter is never around when he'd be any use.

    Definition of HUSSY

    1
    : a lewd or brazen woman
    2
    : a saucy or mischievous girl

    Origin of HUSSY

    alteration of Middle English huswif housewife, from hus house + wif wife, woman
    First Known Use: 1505

  15. #11490
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by KellyAssauer View Post
    Oh! Barbie © 2012 Mattel, Inc. All Rights Reserved....

    Gotcha.
    FIFY

  16. #11491
    practical experience, FTW kenthepen's Avatar
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    The Supreme Court of the United States ruled in 1974 in Taylor v. Schmidt that any woman who *founces* is inviting and initiating sexual interaction.
    113k on WIP! Someone tell me to shut up!

    Severe allergic reaction to the slightest traces of reality

    Kenneth Folta available on Smashwords

  17. #11492
    practical experience, FTW kenthepen's Avatar
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    Smile

    Kelly: Irish from the Old Gaelic meaning "unattainable."
    113k on WIP! Someone tell me to shut up!

    Severe allergic reaction to the slightest traces of reality

    Kenneth Folta available on Smashwords

  18. #11493
    Ooh, that stings. Angie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kenthepen View Post
    The Supreme Court of the United States ruled in 1974 in Taylor v. Schmidt that any woman who *founces* is inviting and initiating sexual interaction.
    Really? That explains why cray does it so often...and why he always looks disappointed.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cassandra, who will NEVER live this down if I have anything to say about it
    At this point, cray, showering with you and qW sounds just fine.
    Quote Originally Posted by Cella
    cray watches kids on Netflix.

  19. #11494
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kenthepen View Post
    The Supreme Court of the United States ruled in 1974 in Taylor v. Schmidt that any woman who *founces* is inviting and initiating sexual interaction.
    Well, duh. Why do you think I wear this tight dress? Gotta show my founce to best advantage.

    *founces provocatively*




    *unfounces*

    Tell me, do you think my toes spoil the effect?

  20. #11495
    practical experience, FTW kenthepen's Avatar
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    It just makes you seem a little pre-octipied.
    113k on WIP! Someone tell me to shut up!

    Severe allergic reaction to the slightest traces of reality

    Kenneth Folta available on Smashwords

  21. #11496
    practical experience, FTW kenthepen's Avatar
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    These days Barrbie seems so Kardashian.
    113k on WIP! Someone tell me to shut up!

    Severe allergic reaction to the slightest traces of reality

    Kenneth Folta available on Smashwords

  22. #11497
    practical experience, FTW kenthepen's Avatar
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    I would, but I don't think they carry the inflatables.
    113k on WIP! Someone tell me to shut up!

    Severe allergic reaction to the slightest traces of reality

    Kenneth Folta available on Smashwords

  23. #11498
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kenthepen View Post
    The Supreme Court of the United States ruled in 1974 in Taylor v. Schmidt that any woman who *founces* is inviting and initiating sexual interaction.
    Quote Originally Posted by Angie View Post
    Really? That explains why cray does it so often...and why he always looks disappointed.
    Cray's not a wom...

    *looks at avie*

    Oh. Never mind.

  24. #11499
    practical experience, FTW kenthepen's Avatar
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    The Supreme court also ruled in that same case that "No state shall pass any law abridging the rights of any male person to engage in the physical behavior known as *founcing.*

    Although I have never taken advantage of that right.
    113k on WIP! Someone tell me to shut up!

    Severe allergic reaction to the slightest traces of reality

    Kenneth Folta available on Smashwords

  25. #11500
    speak softly & carry a fanged beast CassandraW's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kenthepen View Post
    The Supreme court also ruled in that same case that "No state shall pass any law abridging the rights of any male person to engage in the physical behavior known as *founcing.*

    Although I have never taken advantage of that right.
    You read that wrong. FYI, Title VII prohibits sex-based occupational discrimination, so the Supreme Court never would make such a ruling. As Justice Scalia would say, "Duh!"

    What the ruling actually said was that "No state shall pass any law abridging the rights of any mail person to engage in the physical behavior known as *founcing.*"

    The court found that, given the propensity of dogs to chase mail carriers, it was essential to the smooth operation of the United States Postal Service that they be able to founce at will.

    Men, like women, are inviting and initiating sexual interaction when they founce. Or pretty much when they do anything. Men are easy.

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