A Life of Crime and Chocolate

Zelenka · Nov 4, 2011

heyjude said:
Turtles in the road are pretty much an every day thing here. And some drivers feel it's quite entertaining to run them over. So I make it my mission to help them all across the road... at great personal risk.

Are you listening, karma?

Oh, and tarak, the soft shells and snappers require a very deft touch. You have to hold them just so to avoid getting a finger taken off. I still have scars from the last one. That's the one where Animal Services didn't bother to slow down to let me cross the road with my turtle... (the irony is priceless!).

Friend of mine has turtles going past the house too and goes out to help them. She's always saying how bad the motorists are, not looking out for them.

Oh, and my dog was once hit by an SSPCA van. (As in Scottish Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals). Dog wasn't hurt, but the irony of it...

heyjude · Nov 4, 2011

Oh, Zelenka! How awful!

Zelenka · Nov 4, 2011

The dog had taken fright and ran out into the street. Luckily the van was actually slowing down to stop at the church (which is right across the road from my mum and dad's house) so he wasn't going fast. The dog hit the bumper but just kind of rolled, got back on her feet and ran off again. Dad caught her about half a mile down the road at the sawmill. But was scary at the time. The poor SSPCA man was traumatised I think though, not that it was his fault at all.

Doggy is no longer with us but she went on after that to live a long and healthy life, getting into double figures which for an Alsatian with arthritis was pretty good going.

Shakesbear · Nov 4, 2011

Do you have road signs that warn drivers that turtles are crossing the road? Not far from me a village put up 'beware of the ducks' and 'ducks crossing' signs and most drivers slow down. I was stuck in traffic (almost unheard of where I live) when a lorry driver stopped to let a mama duck and her ducklings cross the road.

HistorySleuth · Nov 4, 2011

We used to have traffic stop when cows crossed a major road to get to the other pasture. The farmer got clever and worked with the town, and put in a tunnel that goes under the road.

Deer hits are our major thing.

mccardey · Nov 4, 2011

we have kamikazi kangaroos.

Zelenka · Nov 5, 2011

Wild boar here. Apparently. Never actually seen one. But then I don't drive.

Shakesbear · Nov 5, 2011

I have eaten wild boar. Very nice.

Now here is a mystery ... I weighed myself this morning and found that I had put some weight on. Then I worked out roughly how much chocolate I ate last week and guess what? That is the mystery - does the amount of weight I have put on match the weight of the chocolate or is it less?

heyjude · Nov 5, 2011

Shakesbear said:
Do you have road signs that warn drivers that turtles are crossing the road?

No, they are too worried about the sandhill cranes. Lots of those signs. Those birds are slower than the turtles and far dumber. Hilarious birds, though. Listen to a recording of them. They sound like something prehistoric.

HistorySleuth said:
We used to have traffic stop when cows crossed a major road to get to the other pasture. The farmer got clever and worked with the town, and put in a tunnel that goes under the road.

How funny! What a great solution.

mccardey said:
we have kamikazi kangaroos.

I want to see a kamikaze kangaroo!

Zelenka said:
Wild boar here. Apparently. Never actually seen one. But then I don't drive.

We have those, too. Not long ago I had to stop for baby pigs. Aw.... Also we have to be careful of the armadillos. They will trundle up to your car, wondering what it is. They're soooo cute. But stupid. Like some people I know.

Shakesbear said:
I have eaten wild boar. Very nice.

Now here is a mystery ... I weighed myself this morning and found that I had put some weight on. Then I worked out roughly how much chocolate I ate last week and guess what? That is the mystery - does the amount of weight I have put on match the weight of the chocolate or is it less?

Zelenka · Nov 5, 2011

I need to buy some scales, because I'm still convinced I've lost weight, or at least that I look thinner around my face and neck (though not the big fat belly, alas). I need to get back to weighing the kitteh as well to see how his diet is doing. Funny the stuff you forget you don't have when you come to a new house.

I take my first group of people (if anyone turns up) around Prague Castle tonight at 6pm. How pathetic is it that I'm already getting ready?

heyjude · Nov 5, 2011

That's exciting, Zelenka! You'll be fabulous!

Zelenka · Nov 5, 2011

heyjude said:
That's exciting, Zelenka! You'll be fabulous!

I'm not so scared of the whole speaking in front of people thing, did it for years in London, but it has been ten years since I did a guided tour anywhere, and my boss has a load of rules that we haven't really gone over in terms of paperwork and such. Ugh. I'm going to cheat and go over the one bit of the route I'm not sure of (Golden Lane, because during the day it's ticket-entry only, and though I've been there before I don't know it as well as the rest of the way, so I'm heading down there at 4pm to just walk that part and make sure I don't get lost).

Looking forward to my top hat's first outing though. Really hope someone can take a photo for me.

Uzo · Nov 5, 2011

Zelenka said:
Looking forward to my top hat's first outing though. Really hope someone can take a photo for me.

Don't worry. In my place, they say walls do keep the memories

But on a serious note, I would love to be a part of it.

GailD · Nov 5, 2011

mccardey said:
we have kamikazi kangaroos.

Okay. Just kidding.

You have to go into one of the game reserves to see this. But then you're in their territory.

Zelenka · Nov 5, 2011

Well, turned up, got dressed up and stood at the astronomical clock, but no one turned up to do the tour. So I got to go home early! Which means I get some writing done tonight after all!

Shakesbear · Nov 5, 2011

Zelenka said:
I'm not so scared of the whole speaking in front of people thing, did it for years in London, but it has been ten years since I did a guided tour anywhere, and my boss has a load of rules that we haven't really gone over in terms of paperwork and such. Ugh. I'm going to cheat and go over the one bit of the route I'm not sure of (Golden Lane, because during the day it's ticket-entry only, and though I've been there before I don't know it as well as the rest of the way, so I'm heading down there at 4pm to just walk that part and make sure I don't get lost).

Looking forward to my top hat's first outing though. Really hope someone can take a photo for me.

You'll be fine. The whole speaking in front of people will come back. Can we see a pic of you in the top hat? Please?

HJ the wild boar was in Italy. I was taken to a place way out in the sticks. It was a huge barn size restaurant that did not have a written menu. The waiters went out hunting, shooting and fishing and scoured the local markets. The chef just cooked what ever they returned with. We were asked if we wanted meat,fish or both. We said both and in minutes huge amounts of food started to appear on the table. I had no idea that I was eating wild boar - neither did the people I was with. It was good though, but not as good as the chocolate cake we had for dessert.

heyjude · Nov 5, 2011

Zelenka said:
Well, turned up, got dressed up and stood at the astronomical clock, but no one turned up to do the tour. So I got to go home early! Which means I get some writing done tonight after all!

Sorry no one showed up--I totally would have! And yeah, I want to see pics, too!

Shakesbear said:
HJ the wild boar was in Italy. I was taken to a place way out in the sticks. It was a huge barn size restaurant that did not have a written menu. The waiters went out hunting, shooting and fishing and scoured the local markets. The chef just cooked what ever they returned with. We were asked if we wanted meat,fish or both. We said both and in minutes huge amounts of food started to appear on the table. I had no idea that I was eating wild boar - neither did the people I was with. It was good though, but not as good as the chocolate cake we had for dessert.

That is amazing! And... yanno, yucky to me, but still amazing. :tongue

Zelenka · Nov 5, 2011

I must get a photo when I'm next in to do a shift (we have to leave the coats and hats in the office or risk getting fined 1000CZK if we lose them). Would've asked the blokes who were doing the 7pm tour but I got the impression they were a bit, well, none too friendly and slightly enamoured of themselves. I did think I looked quite cute though and daft though the costume sounded, wandering around the backstreets of the old town with a long coat swishing about you does give you a real sense of power. I felt like a villain out of Harry Potter or something!

Zelenka · Nov 6, 2011

So today has been my domestic day. Made banana and poppyseed cupcakes and experimented making some chocolate covered marzipan shapes, as I want to make some and bring them back to Scotland as pressies this Christmas. Not the neatest of things - I need to figure how to get the chocolate on them in a neater way, but they do taste good!

http://instagr.am/p/TCpSk/

heyjude · Nov 6, 2011

Oh, that's so cute, Zelenka!

Zelenka · Nov 6, 2011

In future I'll just make the star shaped ones, not the shooting stars or snowflakes, as the chocolate covers too much of the detail (the cutter was actually for gingerbread cookies). Now though I have to dispose of the experimental batch...

GailD · Nov 6, 2011

I was paging through an old recipe book, looking for some ideas for Christmas (I know it's a bit early but some Christmas cakes need to be made well ahead of time) and I found two things which might interest you.

1. A vegan Dundee cake. Happy to share the recipe if anyone would like it.

2. A great idea for left-over Christmas pudding. Take a piece of the pudding (about the size of a ping-pong ball or slightly smaller) roll it into a ball. Slip it on a toothpick and coat in melted chocolate. The picture which accompanied this suggestion shows a plate of these chocolate-covered pudding balls with a light dusting of cocoa powder. I love this idea - might even buy ready-made Christmas pud just to make them.

MysteryRiter · Nov 6, 2011

Gail, love the avie!

It's golden!
So just to let you all know, I did an interview with an editor/publisher on my blog today. It really brings you into the mind of editors and what they look for in a submission, how they read it, etc. and it's also pretty funny. Just thought I'd let you know. If you make it a common practice to sub your work to magazines, this is a must-read
http://incessantdroningofaboredwrit...-rebecca-huggins-of-black-lantern-publishing/

Shakesbear · Nov 6, 2011

GailD said:
I was paging through an old recipe book, looking for some ideas for Christmas (I know it's a bit early but some Christmas cakes need to be made well ahead of time) and I found two things which might interest you.

1. A vegan Dundee cake. Happy to share the recipe if anyone would like it.

2. A great idea for left-over Christmas pudding. Take a piece of the pudding (about the size of a ping-pong ball or slightly smaller) roll it into a ball. Slip it on a toothpick and coat in melted chocolate. The picture which accompanied this suggestion shows a plate of these chocolate-covered pudding balls with a light dusting of cocoa powder. I love this idea - might even buy ready-made Christmas pud just to make them.

Oh my! You are evil, you do know that don't you?

I have always made my own Christmas cakes - just love the bit of the recipe that says "baste with Brandy or Scotch once or twice a week". Get high on the fumes!

Shakesbear · Nov 6, 2011

heyjude said:
That is amazing! And... yanno, yucky to me, but still amazing.

muahahahaaha. I do know what you mean. Though the best bit was the confusion I had with my brother.
Me: What was the meat?
Him: Boar!
Me: Who was?
Him: Who was what?
Me: A bore?
Him: The meat.
Me: The meat wasn't boring.
Him: Wild boar.
Me: Oh. A wild piggy thing?
Him: Yes.
Me: Is there any more wine?

I loved Italy!

A Life of Crime and Chocolate

Going home!

Making my own sunshine

Going home!

knows a hawk from a handsaw

Researching History's Mysteries

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knows a hawk from a handsaw

Making my own sunshine

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Making my own sunshine

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Grey Mountain

Still chasing plot bunnies.

Going home!

knows a hawk from a handsaw

Making my own sunshine

Going home!

Going home!

Making my own sunshine

Going home!

Still chasing plot bunnies.

Murder isn't so bad...

knows a hawk from a handsaw

knows a hawk from a handsaw