The Bouncy Castle in Space

All right, any good resolutions, anybody?

My mom always resolves the same thing: Not to throw stones at hippos.

She's the only person I know who actually keeps her resolutions!

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Lose 20lbs and keep it off. I keep thinking that if I lose the weight bits at a time, then it will be easier than trying to kill myself and lose it all at once.

Finish MMD and try to find an agent. Clean up my YA manuscript to the point that I can either query it or if it doesn't query well, turn it into an e-book.

What about you Ms. Judy?

Edit: Playground King, I'm really having fun learning Mandarin. I would highly suggest it.

Great goals, everyone!

Mine:

1) Change job location. I spend far too much time in my car.
2) Lose weight gained in grad school (well, at least some of it. I don't need to be as thin as I was in college.)
3. WRITE. (I'm taking part in the AW Novel Challenge in the W1S1 room).
4. Start taking better care of my skin. I'm 30 now, and while everyone assures me that I'm still wrinkle-free, I swear I can see a faint line forming on my forehead.
5. Improve cooking skills (which will help with the weight loss goals).

Ferret, I think your hubby has the right idea

Playground King - do you teach yourself languages, or take classes? Wow, that's impressive.

I asked my kids what they're resolutions were, and my 12yo said he would resolve to fight less with his brother if he would resolve to be less annoying.

Like Smish, I want to improve my cooking. Maybe I'll resolve to try one new recipe each week. I can see the expressions on my kids' faces already.

I asked my kids what they're resolutions were, and my 12yo said he would resolve to fight less with his brother if he would resolve to be less annoying.

Like Smish, I want to improve my cooking. Maybe I'll resolve to try one new recipe each week. I can see the expressions on my kids' faces already.

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I giggle-snorted . Sometimes I really wish I had kids of my own, but then I start to think about finances and that I'm still fairly young. If you girls need help with cooking ideas or tips just let me know. It is my favorite hobby next to writing. I'm making jambalaya tonight and I'm stoked about it.

I'd like to finish two novels this year. Shouldn't be too hard, as I have a couple in various stages of completion--I even have the cover for one.

Oh, and to not purchase any more covers until the book is done =-)

I have writing goals for the year, but not personal-development-weight-loss-healthy-living kind of resolutions. (Although I was exchanging 2012 goals with a critique partner and at the end of her very sensible and challenging list of writing goals was #5) Eat more leafy greens. Which, let's be honest, couldn't we all? Though probably not while writing.)

For writing, I want to fully complete the current WIP (which should stand at 15,000 by the end of today, unless disaster strikes), thoroughly query it, and start whatever's next. Maybe a full first draft of whatever's next, but I don't want to be that hard and fast about it, because current WIP seems to be a bit of a slow-poke and I don't want to rush her.

SheilaJG said:

Playground King - do you teach yourself languages, or take classes? Wow, that's impressive.

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I took five classes in Spanish. From Spanish 1-4 plus conversation in college. My girlfriend's brothers have a club at school that teaches sign language and they started teaching us and we learned other through ASL (American Sign Language). Sign language wasn't hard to pick up (I'm not at my same level as Spanish, I can be dropped anywhere and be fine, plus I can read and write in Spanish so my overall level is better) but what helped was her brothers and my gf and I talk in it whenever we want to talk a lot now instead of English or even Spanish. I've been lucky that when I learned Spanish my gf and her family are fluent so I'm always around it and with Sign Language my gf and her brothers want to learn it so we always use it. Like we went to Carrabba's and only used Sign Language to talk to one another because we want to learn it.

So I'm just in a generous situation where I'm around others that love to learn too. Which I think is the biggest helper. Like I was saying, when I go back to college to learn French my gf will be taking it with me so whatever we learn we will use together right away. And of course romance languages are similar so that helps.

After learning these languages I find it kind of weak that America doesn't even attempt to teach young children languages at a younger age. I don't know, I think to know more languages not only allows you to converse with more people but also learn more culture of others.


EDIT: So I'm trying to find what's a good range of words for a chapter book and everywhere I go seems to be outdated in information. How long do chapter books run now-a-days?

playground_king said:

After learning these languages I find it kind of weak that America doesn't even attempt to teach young children languages at a younger age. I don't know, I think to know more languages not only allows you to converse with more people but also learn more culture of others.


EDIT: So I'm trying to find what's a good range of words for a chapter book and everywhere I go seems to be outdated in information. How long do chapter books run now-a-days?
3k-10K

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Oh, don't get me started on Americans' ideas about foreign language! I'm a bilingual (Spanish/English) teacher in California. The s**t we've seen over the past 20 years--all of it political, racially motivated, has nothing to do with what's best for kids.

What is best for kids? To learn at least one other language. Study after study after study shows that fluency in 2 or more languages results in higher grades, higher test scores, more empathy for other people, and a whole slew of other benefits, not least of them being employment advantages. (I got hired to teach without having a credential because they needed Spanish-speaking teachers that badly.) And study after study shows that the earlier kids start learning, the more fluent they can be, with no trace of accent.

What do we do? In California, we make teaching a second language illegal! Parents have to apply for a special waiver to have their kids in a bilingual program.

But then, federal law requires the opposite. You have to prove that you are providing access to the core curriculum while a kid is learning English. Which usually means somebody explains concepts to the kid in a language he/she might understand.

So...yeah. Pretty darn hard to stay in compliance with both state and federal law.

I didn't know it was illegal in Ca. My kids have taken Spanish in school since 1st grade, but it's really pathetic. They learn the colors, days of the week, months of the year, and then forget it the following week. I like your method, Playground King - surrounding yourself with others who are learning, so you can immerse yourself in it.

Everyone knows kids have an easier time learning a second language than adults, so I agree with Judy, it's just criminal that we don't teach them. I remember when I was in high school and I went to Sweden and Finland, and everyone seemed to speak English. Someone told me it was mandatory in school.

Yea, my girlfriend lived in China for six months (her father is a business man so she's been to a bunch of places) and it was mandatory for the students there to know three languages, and by know, I mean be fluent. It was just considered normal. You weren't considered "smart" unless you knew at least five languages. She was telling me when she was there everyone was studying hours on end for a test they have that determines if you go to an actual university of a community college, and they have been studying for it since they've been like eight-years-old.

I'm with both of you, it is a crime to not know at least another language (and especially with how much Spanish is used, it's criminal to not be at least conversational). And after you learn one language, others are easier to learn because you know what works for you and more importantly what you really need to know.

I know when I have kids they will at least know four languages (the one's I'll know, and counting English as one of course) because of how important it is. With government jobs, if you are fluent in another language that's a $5,000 bonus to your salary. $5,000! For something that kids can learn when they learn English.

Okay, I'm slightly exaggerating by calling it "illegal." Only bilingual classes are prohibited unless at least 20 parents at at grade level have signed the waiver requesting the program. But since "bilingual" programs can take many forms, and truly bilingual classrooms where kids regularly use both languages are the best way to learn, school districts are really restricted in what they can offer.

Of course, rich kids in neighborhoods with ample community resources can still often get "enrichment" classes in foreign languages. The law ends up mostly affecting poorer communities with lots of immigrant children, since for those kids the "second" language in the bilingual program would actually be the right to use their home language in the classroom.

Those are the kids who by state law aren't supposed to be using Spanish/Chinese/whatever, unless at least 20 of their parents signed the waiver--even though Federal civil rights law says they must be taught in a language they will understand--which may not be English until they've been in school for a few years.

Add in the restrictions imposed by No Child Left Behind and Race to The Top, plus the extreme budget cuts imposed by the collapse of CA's economy... and you can see why things might be a little less than ideal.

And then there's the bureaucracy... I'm supposed to be paying my bills right now, not venting about stuff I can't change. Yet for some reason, there's no money in my checking account. The direct deposit didn't happen on time...

*taking deep breaths, trying not to panic***

Um, yes to everything Judy just said.

I used to teach this amazing classroom residency in San Diego public schools where we'd go into the same ESL classrooms twice a week for 14 weeks and teach them theatre, teaching in Spanish or English, depending on the teacher's preferences. (I specifically remember one high school teacher with 56 students in ONE PERIOD. 56!!! I mean, there were a couple aides, but 56!!!)

What those kids got out of the program (ultimately writing and performing in their own 10 minute plays by the end) was astounding, whether they did it in English or Spanish. The laws around bilingual education changed right around when I stopped teaching in the program, and I don't know what happened to it. Those immigrant kids and bilingual teachers are absolutely the most amazing people I've worked with in a lot of years of arts residencies.

Anyway, side note - playgroundking, there's a great book called FOR HEARING PEOPLE ONLY about deaf culture - you might find it interesting.

So this might sound like a stupid question, but I want to do this right. So I've sent 14 queries out and seven have responded. Six were rejections while one asked for a full. Now with that, would that be a good sign to just send to a bunch of other agents too?

Did you get any personalized feedback or were most of the rejections just form rejections? The full is pretty good news. I wouldn't send a ton more, maybe like six or seven and see how they go. You may never hear back from the other seven that are still floating around. I know a lot of agents that are are turning to just flat out silence. Try a few more and see what your responses are. If they are rejections maybe tweak your query.

I also have a question

This is going to sound very dumb. My first novel was Grimace, the YA Urban Fantasy in my sig. I learned a lot about craft while I was writing it, but the story came out very, very telly. I also need to re-route an essential character. I'm on my 4th draft, and every time I open the file I cringe. Re-writing it to be more showy feels like a huge endeavor :[ . I've read a lot of threads here on show vs. tell and Janice Hardy's amazing blog post about the topic, but I still need help. Anyone have any good links? This will have to be a total revamp...

Congratulations on your full request - it is a good sign. But I wouldn't send to your whole list yet, either. You never know if the one who requested is the one who skips the query and goes straight to the pages. Have you worked your query here in QLH or elsewhere?

I got two requests the first day I was querying, and thought that meant my query rocked, so I went ahead and sent it along to the rest of my top choices. I was then treated to a steady flow of rejections. I tweaked my query some and have since gotten three more requests (one of which came this morning!).

JoyMC said:

Congratulations on your full request - it is a good sign. But I wouldn't send to your whole list yet, either. You never know if the one who requested is the one who skips the query and goes straight to the pages. Have you worked your query here in QLH or elsewhere?

I got two requests the first day I was querying, and thought that meant my query rocked, so I went ahead and sent it along to the rest of my top choices. I was then treated to a steady flow of rejections. I tweaked my query some and have since gotten three more requests (one of which came this morning!).

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Congrats! I sent out like four yesterday so I'll probably sit a bit. And yes I've used QLH and they have been very beneficial. As for response for my rejections I've gotten a few that said they liked the story and characters and premise but it just wasn't for them while others have said they will be passing because it isn't for them.

I'm assuming when you send your full you send it as an attachment?

playground_king said:

I'm assuming when you send your full you send it as an attachment?

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Thanks. Yes, they usually specify (like today she said "preferably in a Word document"). But if not, it's usually understood that requested material can be attached.

I'm assuming when you send your full you send it as an attachment?

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Depends on the agent. While I've never heard of someone wanting it pasted into the body (that would be crazy), I have heard of certain agencies that ask you to upload it to a place on their website. Just check the guidelines.

Went to website, didn't find any requirements for it so I just sent it as an attachment.

Joy--congrats on all the full requests! Here's crossing fingers for you.

king--I've never had a full request that didn't specify how they wanted it. Most say Word or .doc attachments. One agent takes equeries but wants the full mailed to her. If the agent doesn't say, assume they want an attachment.

Kidd--My advice? If the thought of revising makes you cringe, don't. That's kind of my philosophy. Unless you have an agent or editor who thinks it's a great premise and wants revisions, you have no guarantee anyone is going to want the book when you're done with it. So why not move on to a project you're excited about? You can always come back to this one when you're feeling like it. Life is too short and getting published is too uncertain to waste time working on projects if you're not enjoying them.

But on to the other half of your question, which is how to Show vs. Tell...

Gail Carson Levine has some good stuff about that in her book, Writing Magic.

I think it's actually pretty easy to show things, if you focus on a few ideas:

#1: Sensory detail. The more you get into your character's perceptions in the moment, the more a scene feels real. If your character is in a creepy place, show me the creepy things she sees/hears/touches/smells, and I will figure out the creepiness for myself. A few perfect sensory details can really set the mood. Just be very careful that your sensory details don't become cliche ones--we can only have so many pounding hearts before we lose the mood.

#2: Be very faithful to the order of events as they actually happen. Cause and effect. Action and reaction. Or, even better, action, emotional reaction, next action. So if one character says something that makes another character angry, don't waste words telling me how mad it made you, and don't talk about something else before showing me your character's response. Instead, show me one of two things: 1) Your character's sharp response, in words, or 2) Your character's struggle to control the sharp response and not let it come out, followed by whatever they come up with as an alternative. Either of those lets me feel the emotion for myself.

I try to remind myself that characters reveal themselves in everything they say and everything they do. I don't think JKR ever once tells us, in her narration, that Harry Potter is a good/honest/honorable/intelligent person. His actions speak for themselves. I think that's a key part of showing--creating a character whose words and actions are clear and distinct enough to speak for themselves, so the narrator doesn't have to.

Hi gang.

I am back to work today (barely). I'm still kind of dazed and tired, and the pollen levels are really high today blah. Also all the children forgot how to do schoolwork and use manners. Oh well.

Writing dramaz: the little 4th grader I got to do NaNoWriMo spent her winter break tearing the house apart looking for her lost NaNo notebook in despair. Her dad looked very frazzled this morning when he came in to the classroom. There was a happy ending this morning when it was discovered in her desk at school. She wrote 2500 words, well more than the 2000 I challenged her to...so now I owe her a NaNo tshirt

my NY resolutions are: lose more weight, finish my own NaNo novel, send lots of queries, and get back into school!

Sorry. Giant post.

Kidd--My advice? If the thought of revising makes you cringe, don't. That's kind of my philosophy. Unless you have an agent or editor who thinks it's a great premise and wants revisions, you have no guarantee anyone is going to want the book when you're done with it. So why not move on to a project you're excited about? You can always come back to this one when you're feeling like it. Life is too short and getting published is too uncertain to waste time working on projects if you're not enjoying them.

But on to the other half of your question, which is how to Show vs. Tell...

Gail Carson Levine has some good stuff about that in her book, Writing Magic.

I think it's actually pretty easy to show things, if you focus on a few ideas:

#1: Sensory detail. The more you get into your character's perceptions in the moment, the more a scene feels real. If your character is in a creepy place, show me the creepy things she sees/hears/touches/smells, and I will figure out the creepiness for myself. A few perfect sensory details can really set the mood. Just be very careful that your sensory details don't become cliche ones--we can only have so many pounding hearts before we lose the mood.

#2: Be very faithful to the order of events as they actually happen. Cause and effect. Action and reaction. Or, even better, action, emotional reaction, next action. So if one character says something that makes another character angry, don't waste words telling me how mad it made you, and don't talk about something else before showing me your character's response. Instead, show me one of two things: 1) Your character's sharp response, in words, or 2) Your character's struggle to control the sharp response and not let it come out, followed by whatever they come up with as an alternative. Either of those lets me feel the emotion for myself.

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Thank you Judy for taking the time to help me. I've been so worried that this MG novel would end up like my last one that I'm losing sleep over it. When someone says 'show more' I think that show is this big, wide topic that I can't grasp because I'm too air-headed/ADD/stupid to get the concept.

When you break it down into two ideas to focus on, it is MUCH easier. I have a lot of work ahead of me, even just correcting what I've written so far, but I'm starting to think I can really do it now. Don't mean to get all wishy-washy, but I'm so happy right now.

Writing dramaz: the little 4th grader I got to do NaNoWriMo spent her winter break tearing the house apart looking for her lost NaNo notebook in despair. Her dad looked very frazzled this morning when he came in to the classroom. There was a happy ending this morning when it was discovered in her desk at school. She wrote 2500 words, well more than the 2000 I challenged her to...so now I owe her a NaNo tshirt

my NY resolutions are: lose more weight, finish my own NaNo novel, send lots of queries, and get back into school!

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Awww dude, that is a lot for a kid to write. Yikes! Frazzly
parents! It makes me really happy to hear kids still love to write. All the children in my mothers class could care less about reading or writing. It is pretty sad.

I sent a query for a picture book off to a publisher who strictly accepts queries, nothing more.

The following day I received a request for the manuscript.

I know it's a small press, but their illustrators are amazing. The fact that they put out rhyming books is a plus, too.

I'm excited, but the suspense is killing me. I don't know what to expect as far as turn-around for a response, or if they even bother to respond if it isn't to their liking. My only experience with publishers is a snail mail I sent that took six months for a response.

Anyway, lots of bouncing at my house right now.

The Kidd said:

My first novel was Grimace, the YA Urban Fantasy in my sig. I learned a lot about craft while I was writing it, but the story came out very, very telly. I also need to re-route an essential character. I'm on my 4th draft, and every time I open the file I cringe. Re-writing it to be more showy feels like a huge endeavor :[ . ... Anyone have any good links? This will have to be a total revamp...

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Some manuscripts end up helping us learn and then they go in the drawer. So I agree that moving on could be the way to go. But also: revision IS a huge endeavor. To me, it's nowhere near as much fun as the wanton excitement of a first draft, and often it takes longer. So if you're still feeling invested in the story (and it sounds like maybe you are?) keep plugging away! (I wish I had good advice or links for you, but I've learned by reading and writing, reading and writing, reading and writing. I'm terrible at articulating lovely explanations like Ms. Judy just gave.)

MsJudy said:

Joy--congrats on all the full requests! Here's crossing fingers for you.

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Thanks, Judy! I've also had loooooads of rejections and am happily focused on my WIP. When an agent email comes in (like the R I got this morning), I've reached the point where I kind of go, "Oh, yeah! I have queries out!"

I had coffee yesterday with someone I found on AW, who happens to be a MG author, as well as a mom of kids the same age as mine, and lives blocks away from me! So fun to find an in-person writer friend!