The Line of the Day--NO CRITTING

Carleree

Queen of Catastrophes
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Jul 9, 2010
Messages
2,786
Reaction score
341
Location
Canada--not the part covered in ice.
Way to stand out in the crowd, HJ. I like your style. I like everyone's style. A bottle of wine will do that for ya
icon10.gif
 

Zelenka

Going home!
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 1, 2007
Messages
2,921
Reaction score
488
Age
44
Location
Prague now, Glasgow in November
:D

Definitely calls for a smile of some sort. I think I have the hots for a sociopath after two sentences. Now if that's not good writing, I dunno what is...
 

rsiquet

practical experience, FTW
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Apr 9, 2012
Messages
178
Reaction score
31
Here's my favorite bit from a story I've been working on:

Holy s**t - Mike was choking.
No, not just choking, but choking to death.
On one of those radium orange marshmallow candies.
He was choking to death on a goddamned Circus Peanut.
At least, it started out as a single line...
 

DocBrown

Hopes to one day write for food.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Aug 26, 2007
Messages
1,433
Reaction score
254
Location
In the foothills of nowhere...
recurry: I love that line! :ROFL:

Here's one from this morning:

The palm strap was clever enough as innovations went, but Tombs turned the bracer from physical aid into serious weapon by adding two of the Voivodkin claws where my knuckles would hit if I punched something. I made a fist and struck at the air.

“Screw Wolverine and his adamantium. I got dragon claws.”
 

Ken Hoss

Storm Rising A Kelli Storm Novel
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 7, 2009
Messages
3,793
Reaction score
408
Location
The Plaza, NYC (I wish!)
Website
kenhoss.blogspot.com
Love the X-Men reference, Doc. :D

Here's mine from today.

Kelli is in Medellin with the new DEA Agent, Larsen. They are there to try and get Garcia's girlfriend to turn on him, and hopefully get his location. Unfortunately they are too late.

In all her years on the job, Kelli had seen some gruesome crime scenes, but this had to be the worst. Now she felt like a rookie, leaning against the front of the house, bent over and puking.
 

kaitie

With great power comes
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 10, 2009
Messages
11,062
Reaction score
2,668
Awesome lines, guys! :D
 

Nightingale

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Mar 28, 2012
Messages
212
Reaction score
10
Location
Under a rock
Now here I am, lying broken and bleeding on the cold concrete of the parking garage adjacent to the Crafton Memorial Hospital, the smell of fresh oil and old exhaust burning my nose, the humidity so thick I’d be gasping for air even I weren’t dying.
 
Last edited:

Chumplet

This hat is getting too hot
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Dec 18, 2006
Messages
3,348
Reaction score
854
Age
64
Location
Ontario, Canader
Website
www.chumpletwrites.blogspot.com
This is just after our heroine meets the star polo player in my WIP murder mystery called Mallet. He'd taken a spill during the match:

With a slight limp, he wove through the spectators until he reached me. "Did you notice anything odd in Placida's walk when you brought her back to the barn? I must have missed something."

I shook my head. "I didn't have time to notice much." I smiled. "Not even to peek underneath to see if she was a mare or a stallion." When he didn't smile in return, I continued, "She seemed agitated. But I don't know her as well as you do, so she could always act that way." I pointed hesitantly at his chin. "You're bleeding."

He dabbed at his jaw with the back of his hand. "It's nothing." He watched the volunteer veterinary staff load the bay mare onto the equine ambulance. He called after them, "I want a copy of your report."

He turned to me again and regarded me with a softer expression. He said in a low voice, "I forgot to thank you properly for taking care of Placida. She’s been with me a long time." As the public address announcer informed everyone half time would be a few minutes early, he added, "Maybe you’d like to have some champagne and stomp some divots with me."

I grinned. "But we just met." He now smelled like Burberry mixed with soap and grass.

Glancing at his watch, he added, "Actually, can you take a rain check? I need to get back to the guys and rustle up a substitute pony. Can you handle the divots on your own?"

I grinned. "I'll do my best. After all, we don't want you landing on your face again."

He laughed. "Just don’t step on the steaming ones."

I glanced at Lilian, who stood nearby looking at me with naked hate. As I returned her stare, she quickly assumed a grimace that I suppose passed for a smile, and hid behind her sunglasses again.
 

kaitie

With great power comes
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Sep 10, 2009
Messages
11,062
Reaction score
2,668
Hey, it's Chumplet! *Waves*
 

heyjude

Making my own sunshine
Super Member
Registered
Joined
May 15, 2007
Messages
19,740
Reaction score
6,192
Location
Gulf coast of FL
Excellent, Nightingale and Chumplet!

Nightingale, I was gasping along with your character. Nice imagery.

Chumplet, I love the brewing romance and conflict. :)
 

rynthewin

Plotting Princess
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Apr 8, 2012
Messages
160
Reaction score
16
Age
34
Location
Brooklyn, NY
Pythius from Lead Poisoning is still in the planning stages, but so far he's said this:

"I am an artist--how could you not expect me to see the beauty in the pieces of their shattered souls?"
 

Nightingale

Super Member
Registered
Joined
Mar 28, 2012
Messages
212
Reaction score
10
Location
Under a rock
Warning: sexual content

"I told him I could speak just fine but Darcy's mouth had been a little too full of Michael's dick to carry on a conversation lately."
 

Namatu

Lost in mental space.
Super Member
Registered
Joined
Oct 12, 2006
Messages
4,489
Reaction score
967
Location
Someplace else.
My MC is thrown for a loop by a giant conspiracy dropped in her lap by an old colleague. At least some of it is true, but she doesn't know how much, or how far to trust Pagan.

Every challenge I posed to Pagan, he met with more complications and higher stakes. As isolated as he'd been, undercover for so long, he'd lost his touchstone. He saw the world through distrustful eyes, and it colored everything. Pagan lived now in an alternative reality, where the facts were twisted to serve his paranoia and the conspiracy that grew to accommodate those facts.

How much of what he'd told me was true and how much fabrication? Had he set himself on a path to martyrdom at the hands of his imagined evil? Or was the heart honest and only the edges bent to his vision?

[FONT=&quot][/FONT]