Buying kidlit=Pedophile?

benbradley said:

Let's see, if I were going to be evil and lure a child away from some public or semipublic area, what would I use to entice them:

A book meant for children?

A hand-held electronic game/toy?

Candy?

If anyone deserves funny looks you'd think it would be adults who buy products in the last two categories.

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For God's sake, people, I own a TOY store. Adults buy these things for children every damn day. Candy, too. Geeeezus. Let's get real. Start a thread about something serious. Lindsay Lohan or something.

caw

I'm sorry so many of you have had this problem.

I don't talk to other people's kids, or usually smile at them, but little kids are cute. I'm just not comfortable about it, because I know how I'd feel if I was a parent. (Probably a little paranoid. I think a lot of it comes from how much the news media focuses on getting people terrified, frankly. I know, I know--different discussion.)

I go to the YA and even MG sections of the library and book store frequently. I don't get funny looks (to my knowledge), and I avoid interacting with the young people there.

But I probably really don't get looks in these sections because I look young. Yeah. Maybe I'm lucky that way after all.

(Side note: I remember the first time someone mistook me for a college student instead of a teenager. I was almost grinning from ear to ear and I wanted to thank her so much!!!)

I think it's difficult to be friendly to kids you don't know these days. (It's been a couple of years, but I used to volunteer to help with the younger kids for VBS down at our local church, and there was never any awkwardness about being nice to kids there. I remember some of them just wanted to be hugged constantly, but it was O.K., it was a safe place for that.)

I hope if I'm ever a parent I won't make my kids super-scared of strangers. It's good for kids to be cautious, but not afraid to be friendly in a normal, little-kid way. Really small children wave and smile at everyone. You almost can't help but smile and wave back. It would be nice if children could keep some of that innocent friendliness. We need more friendliness in this world, not less.

mware01 said:

Does anyone else get strange looks when they buy kid lit?
Ok, so I'm 35 and starting to loose some of my hair. Does that mean I can't enjoy Ronald Dahl or Meg Cabot?

No one's ever said anything, but I have had parents give me strange looks (even cold stares) when I browse the kids section by myself.

I take my daughter to Barns & Noble, but she's 2 and likes to take every book off the shelf. Which means she can't yet accompany me to used and independent book stores.

I can't really blame parents, what with everything that they show on the nightly news. It just always feel like I'm in the restricted section.

Maybe when I finally get a book published I'll get a t-shirt that says, 'Children's book Author, don't be frightened.'

Anyone else get this? Could it be my imagination?

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I treat every child I encounter the way I would treat a bear cub. Give it a wide berth, and don't let the mother see you too close.

(1 - They're germ riddled.
(2 - Their parents are nearby and in a bad mood. Always.
(3 - It may start crying, and if this happens while you're close, your only hope is to flee, or to have a keenly honed ability to teleport.

I suspect that the real reason adults would be banned from the YA section in the library is because there are usually way fewer titles than in the adults' section and they want YA readers to be able to access them.

mware01 said:

I wasn't complaining (OK, maybe I was a little). I just wanted to see if I was the only one that saw this. Apparently I'm not.

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I'm middle aged but female and I think people assume I'm buying for my own kids. I did experience something similar though in the library when I was browsing picture books. The Mums reading to their children were curious rather than hostile but they definitely thought I was a little odd and kept their children close.

I can go into the kid's section at the bookstore without any problems. Spent quite a while there picking out a book for one of my cousins. The local library--that's okay, too. The YA section is right next to the sci-fi section.

But the main library ... I have to go to the librarian at the desk and be escorted in. It makes it hard to browse for possible research books when someone is hovering behind you. I finally started just looking online and requesting the books be held. Much easier and less hassle.

Then, of course, this particular library also had a problem with the homeless coming in to stay all day.

The media's delight in covering sensational stories gives the public the impression that murderers, pedophiles, etc., are lurking everywhere. And now every innocent passing balloon is going to be suspected of abducting a six-year-old kid.

Having worked for years in a mental health facility, I know only too well that the vast majority of abuse comes from people the victim knows well. So if people were being reasonable, it would be their family and friends they'd eye suspiciously. But, you see, people aren't reasonable. They want to believe it can only be the Big Bad Stranger who could do them and theirs harm.

That's a really good point, Phael. And much of the well-meaning (slash exploitative) writing on the subject tends to create this drooling, creepy character lurking around the bushes.
When actually the danger is from the kindly pastor, hearty coach, revered priest, or just daddy and big brother.

It seems to me that the biggest thing people can do is to simply talk to their kids, listen to their kids and make their kids beleive that they can share things with them safely.

thethinker42 said:

Does it occur to no one that you could be buying them as gifts?

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That would require that they actually stop being paranoid for a moment and think.

GraysonMoran said:

I dunno, I kind of get the hots over Charlotte. Web porn before web porn was cool.

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Chances are that somebody else has thought the same thing. Rule 34 is a harsh mistress.

scarletpeaches said:

I have a friend (female) who really loves children. I told her once that if I saw a kid crying in public, I'd walk right on by. She was horrified. I explained, I wouldn't want to be accused of trying to abduct a kid, so it's up to the parents to make sure they don't lose their child.

My friend said no matter what the circumstance she'd make sure the child got somewhere safe and I said, "Fine, if you want to be accused of all sorts, that's up to you. You'd put the child first. I'd put me first."

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I agree with you, and that's exactly how I act around strangers' kids. If I see a kid crying, I turn my back, turn up the volume on my iPod, and walk away. And sometimes I'll change the song to "Dead Babies" by Alice Cooper.

I'm a long-haired metalhead, and I know I don't exactly look wholesome or entirely trustworthy. I've gotten stares when buying a cute plush toy for my wife, and even had a Barnes & Noble clerk question my motives when I came to the counter with a copy of Charles de Lint's A Circle of Cats that I wanted to buy for my wife.

My husband once came to the aid of a little girl, 5yrs old, when another kid, 11yrs old, was hitting her. The boy was a total jerk, cursed at my husband and continued to hit the little girl. My husband gently and I do mean gently tapped the kid on the head to get his attention. Remember, the kid's hitting the little girl. Well the punk runs home tells his strung out mother who phones the police then comes over and attacks my husband. Hubby pushes her off just as the police arrive and charge him with assault. He had to take anger management classes! If it had been me there would have been bloodshed and prison time involved.
The world we live in has gone insane. We have created an environment that rewards looking the other way when a person is in need. We teach each other that to help someone is to pay a price and that is an incredible wrong. My husband did the right thing and he says he would do it again. The little girl needed help and that was more important than his inconvenience. It may be that people are persecuted for innocuous or even well meaning efforts of assistance but that doesn't mean its right. It doesn't and shouldn't mean that we curl up with fear and let bad things happen because we're afraid of dirty look or even something worse.
The atmosphere of fear we are seeing is an evil seed of apathy and we should not suffer it to grow.
Oh, I loves me some soapbox.

Bluegate said:

Oh, I loves me some soapbox.

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In other words, no good deed goes unpunished?

Chances are that somebody else has thought the same thing. Rule 34 is a harsh mistress.

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LOL
I'm looking for the smut site for Animal Farm.

Bluegate said:

My husband once came to the aid of a little girl, 5yrs old, when another kid, 11yrs old, was hitting her. The boy was a total jerk, cursed at my husband and continued to hit the little girl. My husband gently and I do mean gently tapped the kid on the head to get his attention. Remember, the kid's hitting the little girl. Well the punk runs home tells his strung out mother who phones the police then comes over and attacks my husband. Hubby pushes her off just as the police arrive and charge him with assault. He had to take anger management classes! If it had been me there would have been bloodshed and prison time involved.
The world we live in has gone insane. We have created an environment that rewards looking the other way when a person is in need. We teach each other that to help someone is to pay a price and that is an incredible wrong. My husband did the right thing and he says he would do it again. The little girl needed help and that was more important than his inconvenience. It may be that people are persecuted for innocuous or even well meaning efforts of assistance but that doesn't mean its right. It doesn't and shouldn't mean that we curl up with fear and let bad things happen because we're afraid of dirty look or even something worse.
The atmosphere of fear we are seeing is an evil seed of apathy and we should not suffer it to grow.
Oh, I loves me some soapbox.

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That sucks. I tell you what I would do, honestly, knowing that anyone who could raise that little piece of shit vag-turd probably is a god awful parent....

Ask the kid where his mother is. If he won't answer or doesn't know, begin yelling loudly if anyone there knows whose child it was.

If no one answers, immediately call the sheriffs office and tell them that there is a child who has been abandoned and is abusing one of the other children.

They show up, take the child / parent into custody, parent loses custody of child, your hubby comes home with the satisfaction he's ruined someone's day.

Everyone wins.

Sounds like we've run the gamut of discussion. Locking now.