Barbara Bauer Literary Agency / Literary Management Professionals

My guess is, if any of this nonsense is true, that Frank Pallone's assistants are going to do a Google search, come here, ask around, find out that Babs really is insane in her claims, and let it fade into the night.

As soon as someone from that office asks her for her sales records, it'll all be over.

'Cause telling the truth ain't libel.

emeraldlatina said:

Preditors and Editors: This site disparages hundreds of companies, run by a man called Dave Kuzminski, with no known address or phone number, said to have a Russian accent.

Absolute Water Cooler: This site disparages hundreds of companies and sells Google affiiliated advertising, an Absolute Write University, conferences, editorial books and other services.

Congressman Frank Pallone, Jr., (D-NJ) has received a videotape of a serious incident which took place in May, 2006, involving invasions of privacy, libel, and copyright infringement, and in which he as assured us of his ongoing interest in our behalf.

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Hmm...with a last name of Kuzminski, I thought Dave was Polish (like me; my maiden name ends in "ski" too ).

AW...ooo, ooo, disparages hundreds of companies...and people like Barbara Bauer.

Congressman Pallone...dang it, I'm not in his district. But I think Christine's right, in that if his assistants do a Google search, they'll eventually end up here and drop the whole thing.

~Nancy

emeraldlatina said:

Preditors and Editors: This site disparages hundreds of companies, run by a man called Dave Kuzminski, with no known address or phone number, said to have a Russian accent.

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Not only does Sinister Dave Kuzminski have a Russian accent and no known address, but he runs hundreds of companies!

No wonder Preditors and Editors disparages the guy. Anybody here got a phone number for the John Birch Society?

James D. Macdonald said:

Sure, she's sort-of using it like a noun (though her grammar is sloppy), but the sense of "coerce" may be closer to what she was trying to get across.

I'm pretty sure that she doesn't know what the word means, as either a noun or a verb.

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One could never accuse of her precise speech. Another historical note, the dragoon units of the English Civil War often handled the 'recruiting' (can we say 'press-gangs') for both Royalist and Parliamentarian forces. They also gathered supplies and food from the countryside in the same manner. Being mounted they could move faster than the news of their presence, and being armed and trained as light infantry they were good at knowing where the 'peasants' were likely to hide the milk cows and chickens. There was certainly a spirit of coercion in both endeavors.

Perhaps Babs has a chicken thief and pillager in the woodshed somewhere? German name, hmmm? Maybe she had family working both sides of the Thirty Years War? Now there were a bunch of good foragers!

Regards,
Scott

I mean, yeah, I live in NJ, but I've never heard of this guy. He must be up north.

Congressman Frank Pallone, Jr. represents the 6th district

Ah, I think I'm in the third or fourth. I forget, I just go where they tell me to when I vote.

Well, there's a contact button for him, so if this thing really does go anywhere, we can all drop him a line.

As I said, I really don't think it will go anywhere; they'll figure out how, um, less than in charge of her faculties she is soon enough.

Comrade Kuzminski, game is over! Must now return to Motherland for conference with handlers at Committee for State Security!

A few comments on which I have absolute, personal knowledge:

* Comrade Kuzminski does not speak with Russian accent. Nor with Polish accent, or any Eastern European accent. I have address and phone number for Comrade Kuzminski:
Rezident
2650 Wisconsin Ave NW
Washington, DC 20007
202.298.5700
For you, Comrade Bauer, Siberian Express is not cold front from east. (And if you want good laugh, do reverse directory lookup on phone number.)

* As outside counsel to Writer Beware, I can state with authority that Writer Beware is not run "in collaboration with" or "in tandem with" any other website. And it's not just the website; Writer Beware is a fully independent operation.

* Miss Snark is one person. "Dragoon" refers to "a dragoon of snarklings," which is something like "a school of sharks," "a murder of crows," or "a wallet of lawyers." It does not, however, refer to the purported top-secret conspiracy of publishing insiders dedicated to keeping all benefits of the publishing industry, including such fun things as auditing royalty statements, for themselves. (That's the American Booksellers' Association. ;-) )

Oh, I give up. I have other things to do today, like topple a third-world government or three.

Jaws said:

(And if you want good laugh, do reverse directory lookup on phone number.)

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Good thing I'd just finished my soft drink.

Keep up the good work, comrades!

By the way, it should be noted that Rep. Pallone sits on the House Energy and Commerce Committee, in particular the Telecommunications and Internet subcommittee. That's according to his official biography. There is, however, no record of him saying that the Internet is just tubes. (That distinction belongs to a congresscritter from Alaska, I believe.)

Wow. The only thing missing from that newsletter is the rumour that Dave's trying to do a deal with Casto to put googlebombs on Cuba. Those dirty commie, pinko, liberal devils!

I have to wonder what, exactly, would be the problem if Miss Snark were more than one person? If she were, say, two or three people, who cares? If she were a dozen people (unlikely; too many cooks in the kitchen and all that), what would that mean exactly?

I love the implication that Dave's purported Russian accent is somehow a bad thing.

Jaws, man, you got issues. Let's see if she really dials that number.

202.298.5700

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A link to a working reverse directory would help. The ones I found didn't work or they wanted money.

But then I had a tooth out and look more like my icon than I prefer. The pain meds ain't helpful to higher brain functions, either.

Heh--shall we send Ms. Bauer's addy to the IRS? She wants a Fed fight, we might as well play hardball. I seriously doubt she'd want to explain to them the details of her income.

On the other hand the woman is clearly mental. What sane person does the dumb-a## stuff she pulls?

Gillhoughly said:

A link to a working reverse directory would help. The ones I found didn't work or they wanted money.

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I found a free one, but all it gave me was the address Jaws already listed, no name. So, is there deep significance to the address? Like ... maybe it's an embassy or something?

The number resisted my efforts to get a free reverse listing, as well, so I'm guessing its for the Dept. of Justice.

Gillhoughly said:

A link to a working reverse directory would help. The ones I found didn't work or they wanted money.

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Here ya go: www.whitepages.com.

But I went one better and linked to the search right here:

http://www.whitepages.com/9901/search/ReversePhone?phone=202-298-5700

Ooh, I didn't think of the Dept of Justice, Dawno. That would be good.

ETA: Ah, I see by aadams73's link that my embassy thought was right after all.

I had no problem looking the number up.

1. Go to switchboard.com
2. Click on Search by Phone
3. Copy and paste the number in Jaws' post into the field
4. Click Search
5. Jaws diabolical sense of humor will reveal itself.

Thank you Birol.

I think I used the white pages one too, it was the only one I found that was free.

I just did a Google search on the phone number and found it.

Same here. Just pasted it into Google.

Ooooh! Babs got into Pooper's Scoops! It's at URL http://poopersscoops.typepad.com/ in the 7 April listing. George states that no one has received service yet, but I'm not certain that's entirely accurate. I know I haven't, but I'm only one of many listed in that filing.

I was looking at the listing on the court site today, and there's no date of service listed. I wonder if there's any deadline for that sort of thing?

Just curious, mainly.

I should also point out that the article on Ms. Bauer has been removed from Wikipedia. This action is apparently separate from the suit. It was determined that Bauer was not notable, I think.

I'm not touchin' that one.