Christmas songs, the alternate title

Deck the Guy

Silver Balls

Have Yourself An Erotic Little Christmas

Jolly Old Rolling Thunder

Here Comes TrainofThought

"I Heard The Sirens On Christmas Day" (I'm watching World's Wildest Police Videos, okay?)

"O Little Town of Bethlehem, PA"

"The Twelve Days of Christmas Shopping."

"Rudolph The Red-Haired Reindeer"

"All I Want For Christmas is Jimmy Page" (No, wait, Jamie West-Oram - wait. Do I have to choose? Can't I have both? I've been really really good......)

And, from a deeply missed late friend:
"Oh, You better unpout, you better uncry
You better unshout, I'm telling you why
Big Brother is coming to town!"

ETA - The whole song was in Newspeak. I wish I had a copy of his lyrics. George Orwell was probably spinning in his grave, but I was rolling on the floor laughing....

"Chuck's nuts roasting on an open fire. . ."

(I actually had this whole song rewritten as a comedic S&M bit years ago. It's far too crude to repeat here.)

"Carol Really Smells"

"Grandma Just Fell Over in Her Rain Gear"

"Sandy Claws Are Tearing My Gown"

"The Little Thrummer Toy"

"Violent Night"

"O Come All Ye Jizzful"

"Tinker Bell Smock"

"O Little Mound of Meth in Hand"

"Stanislaus Has Crummy Old Towns"


Theongome

My favorite came from my daughter when she was very little...

"Heck, the Herald Angels Sing"

"I Saw Daddy Kissing Santa Claus"
"Oh Shopping Spree"

I recently wrote "Its Beginning to Look a Lot Like Clinton"

"Bring a Condom, Jeanette, Isabella."

"Away in Larry Craig's Manger."

"Come buy my nice fresh Hash."

"Good King What's-His-Name."

"Ding Dong Mary is High."

"Go Tell it On the Mountain (....and Then Jump)"

"I Prey on Christmas Children."

"I Saw Three Ships (Come Crashing into each other)"

"It Came Upon the Monkey's Rear."

"I Wonder as I Wander into a Light Pole."

"The Seven Flings of Mary."