The "I'm sorry" thread

Komnena

In Honor of Peter Tomich,USS Utah
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you'll be okay if you stay away from the lions.
I';m sorry the Martians think you're insane
 

Nymtoc

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...but the werewolves only come out when there's a full moon, and tonight--oops, I was looking at the wrong chart. There will be a full moon tonight. When you get to the bottom of the ravine, they will disable your car. Then they...you know the rest of the story...

I'm sorry you went swimming in that polluted river, but...
 
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Komnena

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it beats being kidnapped by wormfaces.
I'm sorry you've got a large black monolith on your lawn but
 

Nymtoc

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...it could mean that you have been given an immensely important assignment by the forces that control the galaxy. Or not.

I'm sorry I took your husband to the Bunny Ranch, but...
 

Nymtoc

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...you're no James Bond, and you wouldn't know the difference between vermouth and Worcestershire sauce.

I'm sorry my lawnmower went wild and cut down all your deliphiniums, but...
 

Robbert

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...you sure have a lawnmower liability insurance, don't you?

I'm sorry you crashed into an electricity post while driving me to hospital, but...
 

Komnena

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at least you got free shock treatment.
I'm sorry I ate all the cavorite
 

Komnena

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now you don't have to worry about what to serve the Eloi.
I'm sorry I got you assigned to throw the magic ring down the volcano
 

Komnena

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but don't worry your wizard friend will throw it off the bridge. Of course he'll have to throw himself as well so no more wizard friend.
I'm sorry your appliances have taken control of your house but
 

Komnena

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just don't go to Samarra.
I'm sorry your mother in law was a real witch but
 

Komnena

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it has to be done to save the world from Martian flu.

I'm sorry the Martians are invading Grover's Mills but
 

Komnena

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I'm sure you'll enjoy the new experience of being stalked.
I'm sorry I cut up your curtains to make myself a dress but
 

Nymtoc

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...green and purple Teddy bears will look better on me than they did in your window.

I'm sorry I left the skylight open during the thunder storm, but...
 

shakeysix

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at least the softball sized hail didn't beak the glass. shame about your head.

i'm sorry that i have eaten the plums that were in the icebox and that you were probably saving for breakfast but...
 

Nymtoc

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...plums are not good for you. They add to your already purplish complexion.

I'm sorry I didn't come to your cat's funeral, but...
 

ShannonR.

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...don't you think a gold-and-marble mausoleum is a bit excessive?

I'm sorry busted all the lights on your truck with a baseball bat, but...