*settles into rocking chair, picks up knitting*
You know the trouble with newbies today? No initiative, that's what.
Now, when I was a newbie, I leapt into that chair to be electrocuted. I got right in line for qW to molest me. I practically begged Haggis and Reg to shmoo me. I humbly studied the back posts to learn the inside jokes. And when I still couldn't figure them out, dammit, I asked! I still don't understand half of them, but do you hear me complaining?
But where's that kind of initiative nowadays? Kids today expect everything to be handed to them. They think the rest of us should go out of our way to duct tape them and force them into the chair. To shmoo them for no reason at all. To talk to them politely about whatever cockamamie subject they want to introduce. To bring them evil donuts for nothing.
I mean, what's this forum coming to? Amirite?