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threedogpeople
03-03-2007, 11:19 AM
(singing) Sarina, Sarina....Where you been so long?
Sarina, Sarina....where you been so long?
We've been waitin' for your entrance....
All the darned day long!

NEWS! i NEED NEW BABY NEWS!!! Damn, I got a feeling that it's gonna' be a long night.

(praying) Lord, we ask that you watch over the Glasser family and bring this baby safely into the world. Please take care of Jenna and Anthony and help them have strength, wisdom and faith as they begin this wonderful journey as a new family. And if you could, please hurry it up, because some of us are on pins and needles waiting, which is not very comfy indeed. In your name we pray....


For you that don't share the above beliefs, no disrespect for your beliefs intended. Please consider the above as warm wishes and good throughts.

Judy

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 11:26 AM
Reopen your prayer before you send it, and add "And hurry up, because some of us are on pins and needles waiting, which is not very comfy indeed."

Old Hack
03-03-2007, 12:01 PM
I've had a whole night's sleep since I last posted, and still no news. I hope Jenna's getting some sleep too. And Judy, I'm not religious but I thought your prayer was very welcoming indeed. Lovely warm thoughts.

OK: I can't think of a baby-question to post, so here's a story about my boys. This happened just last night.

Freddy, my six-year-old, is dyslexic. We were doing a little work together and I asked him to suggest a word beginning with D. I pointed to my husband, thinking that might help Fred, as said husband is called David and is Fred's Daddy. So Freddy stared at David, thought for about two seconds, and then shouted triumphantly,

"Dick!"

You've got to love children. Otherwise you'd end up killing them sometimes.

Still thinking of you, Jenna, and sending you backrub thoughts. I liked backrubs when I was labouring.

MacAllister
03-03-2007, 03:04 PM
I left a message for Anthony, guys, with my cell number. No word, yet--but I promise as soon as I hear anything, I'll let you all know.

I sorta figure they're a little preoccupied with the newest family member.

robeiae
03-03-2007, 03:41 PM
Sometimes labor can go on for fourteen or fifteen days...

Little Red Barn
03-03-2007, 04:12 PM
No news yet?

triceretops
03-03-2007, 04:43 PM
I'm dying of the suspense already. Somebody mop my brow and adjust my particle mask. I just tripped over my plastic shoes and snapped a rubber glove finger in my eye.

I'm aaalllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllright. I'm aaallllllllllllllllllllllllllllright. Dont' worry about me. Damnit, answer that phone! Somebody's knocking at the door now!

I'm all right. I tell ya.

Tri

rtilryarms
03-03-2007, 05:37 PM
Just like a writer:

*Slow story build-up
*Introduction of characters
*Get the reader involved with the story line
*Throw some love and sex in there
*Get us to anticipate the ending
*Keep us on edge as the ending draws near
*Suddenly throws the drama against us
*Leave a cryptic message
*Insert a high-speed car chase (hospital trek)
*Mystery and disappearance smothers the reader
*Drive us to pulling out our hair, our hearts in rapid paces and knuckles white with the agony of concern and terror.
*Pain, agony, yelling, screaming, no football on TV in the waiting room! All possible human suffering in one chapter.
*Then throw in the climax. Or maybe that was the spoiler at the beginning of this novel.

We need to rewrite our birthing procedures.

eldragon
03-03-2007, 06:25 PM
C'mon!

stormie
03-03-2007, 07:21 PM
Wow, just came back on after ten hours and...no word yet?? Poor Jenna! (My first labor lasted three days. The stupid about-to-retire doctor had to play golf one of those days. Seriously. The nurse told me that's where he was.)

Moral to the story: never get a stupid about-to-retire doctor.

Okay, Jenna, we're here for you! You're in our thoughts, as you can well see when you have the chance in a few years to read through all of these messages.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 08:03 PM
Gee...

...I can't wait for my turn to do this in four months or so...

I'll bring someone's phone number and text them incessantly. Unlike Jenna...

kristie911
03-03-2007, 08:21 PM
I can't stand the waiting!!!

P.H.Delarran
03-03-2007, 08:21 PM
Look at all these pacers!
Virtual Waiting Rooms, the future is here. Now if the baby would get here!

Bartholomew
03-03-2007, 08:23 PM
OK...

Breathing...

Not passing out...

My water broke... possibly today, but it's also likely I've been walking around with ruptured membranes for about a week... so I'm on a time clock now. By about 9 a.m. tomorrow, Sarina must be out of my body...

AAAAAAAAAAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!

OK, dudes, I'm outta here. I have to go to the hospital and figure out if I'm letting them induce me with evil stuff or go for a C-section. Please think positive things for us! This is so surreal.

Talk to you in a few days.

XOXOX,
me

Jenna! Jenna! Jenna! Jenna! Jenna! Jenna!

aruna
03-03-2007, 08:24 PM
Call us the Obsessive Jenna's Baby's Birth-Thread Checkers Club....

Jenna, you'll have to print out this thread and keep it to show Sarina in a couple of years!

Birol
03-03-2007, 08:25 PM
Um, Pete, you'll have a slightly different role in your little drama.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 08:56 PM
Um, Pete, you'll have a slightly different role in your little drama.

You're right. I'll just bring a notebook and my trusty fountain pen.

;)

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 08:57 PM
1)Call us the Obsessive Jenna's Baby's Birth-Thread Checkers Club....

2) Jenna, you'll have to print out this thread and keep it to show Sarina in a couple of years!


1) I don't know what we're going to talk about once the baby arrives. It's going to be strange.

2) I think I'd keep us a dark secret for as long as possible.... :)

As in "and now that we've discussed the facts of life, and told you about the adoption of your brother, it's time I showed you where mommy goes for three hours every night..."

Jean Marie
03-03-2007, 09:01 PM
1) I don't know what I'm going to talk about once the baby arrives. It's going to be strange.

2) I think I'd keep me a dark secret for as long as possible.... :)
Couldn't agree more...:ROFL:

Birol
03-03-2007, 09:05 PM
2) I think I'd keep us a dark secret for as long as possible.... :)

You mean Jenna's going to have to hide us in her underwear drawer and only take us out when Sarina's not around?

Perks
03-03-2007, 09:23 PM
I obviously don't know what's going on with Jenna, but I do have some midwifery training and I can tell you that the choices she thought she had - induction or c-section - are only the mandated guidelines of doctors. Jenna's working with a doula, so there is another option: do nothing. A ruptured amniotic sac is no cause to feel disaster looming. Not to be crude, but as long as everyone keeps their grubby paws out of her vagina, there's no cause for alarm at this late state. Sarina is baked enough to be born and as long as Jenna stays hydrated and fed, her body will keep making the cleansing fluid at an astonishing rate until the cocktail of labor hormones is brewed and ready. True, she'll be wandering around in a diaper, but unless she shows any sign of fever, there's nothing to worry about. The baby doesn't need to float in the fluid to be healthy. Midwives often don't raise an eyebrow about ruptured membranes (assuming she had a full and not just a tear) for 72 hours.

All that aside, my thoughts and hopes are with her, finding her comfortable (as much as can be hoped for) and cared for and saving her strength. :) Go Jenna!

Birol
03-03-2007, 09:42 PM
You people are truly slipping. I thought this would have been enough to have Robeiiaieiaeiaieiaeiaieiaie murdered. I thought for sure I would have seen his body on a stake somewhere in the Cooler. Nobody killed him for this statement? Wow. I'm truly shocked.

Staking him out would just give him what he wants. Better to torture him slowly by ignoring his attempts to start the deliberate debate he desires.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 09:45 PM
Perks, I think that was the most alarming paragraph I've ever read, and I'm going to go huddle in the corner until I feel better.

robeiae
03-03-2007, 09:46 PM
Is there gonna be a steak-out? Cool...

I'll bring the horseradish!




ETA: And anyway, I still have a secret.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 09:53 PM
They already know you're a fourteen year old boy, Rob. Sorry.

Perks
03-03-2007, 09:54 PM
Perks, I think that was the most alarming paragraph I've ever read, and I'm going to go huddle in the corner until I feel better.Lol! Why?

Jean Marie
03-03-2007, 09:55 PM
They already know you're a fourteen year old boy, Rob. Sorry.
And that you're really a girl, Paris.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 10:01 PM
I obviously don't know what's going on with Jenna, but I do have some midwifery training and I can tell you that the choices she thought she had - induction or c-section - are only the mandated guidelines of doctors. Jenna's working with a doula, so there is another option: do nothing. A ruptured amniotic sac is no cause to feel disaster looming. Not to be crude, but as long as everyone keeps their grubby paws out of her vagina, there's no cause for alarm at this late state. Sarina is baked enough to be born and as long as Jenna stays hydrated and fed, her body will keep making the cleansing fluid at an astonishing rate until the cocktail of labor hormones is brewed and ready. True, she'll be wandering around in a diaper, but unless she shows any sign of fever, there's nothing to worry about. The baby doesn't need to float in the fluid to be healthy. Midwives often don't raise an eyebrow about ruptured membranes (assuming she had a full and not just a tear) for 72 hours.


Gee, Perks, I can't imagine... ;)

Jean Marie
03-03-2007, 10:03 PM
Gee, Perks, I can't imagine... ;)
Yeah, and all you did, was...

Shwebb
03-03-2007, 10:04 PM
Perks, I think that was the most alarming paragraph I've ever read, and I'm going to go huddle in the corner until I feel better.You mean the placenta conversation didn't bother you, at all?

I actually have a picture of the placenta from when I had Emmory. The doc wanted us to take a picture of it for the ultrasound tech, because she located a cyst on it during our last u/s. (The cyst was benign, btw. It was composed of Wharton's jelly, the stuff that the umbilical cord is made of.)

I'd post the picture, but it is wayyyyy too yucky, even for me. Besides, The People's Republic of China wouldn't like it. Not at all.

Heh. When I was in labor with my first, my mom stopped in to my room and visited awhile. Oh, yay. She likes to make nervous conversation, so in the middle of a really painful contraction, she starts asking, "Hey, what do y'all think about Elvis? Didn't he make the best music? Boy, I really like his music."

So, y'all like Elvis?
Don't you dare tell me I take after my mom. You hear me?

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 10:06 PM
I'm going to totally do that to my wife. :D

PETE:"Honey?"

WIFE: "NNNNNGGGG what??"

PETE: "I was thinking of sending out that short story I wrote last night to Weird Magazine later today, do you think we can afford the postage?"

WIFE: "VICIOUS SWEARING AND SCREAMING"

PETE: "Geeze! Okay! It can go to Realms of Fantasy too, if you're going to get grumpypants about it...! GAWD!"

WIFE: "CURSING LINEAGE AND CAMELS"

PETE: "If you didn't like the story, just say so."

Perks
03-03-2007, 10:07 PM
Gee, Perks, I can't imagine... ;)
Lol! You think that's bad? It's all true, every word. The things I could tell you... you're so easy.

One of the medical myths surrounding childbirth, albeit one that has relaxed somewhat with just a smidge of common sense, it that the environment needs to be sterile. "Boil water! The baby's coming!" Lol!

Ahem, excuse me. Babies are born an inch and change away from your *******. Ain't enough al-kee-hawl or boiled linens in the world to make this a sterile procedure. Clean'll have to do. Lol!

Poor PeeDee.

robeiae
03-03-2007, 10:08 PM
During the birth of my first, my wife was going through a contraction when I harmlessly asked "How do you feel?" Sheesz...

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 10:09 PM
:scared: :e2thud:

Shwebb
03-03-2007, 10:13 PM
When my mom was pregnant with me and my brother (38 and 40 years ago, respectively) they would check to see how dilated the mother's cervix was by doing a rectal exam.

No, I'm not making this up. I'll admit that when I heard my mom say this the first time, I chalked it up to her being a total nut. But, yeah, it's true!

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 10:15 PM
I'm so glad I'm a guy...

tjwriter
03-03-2007, 10:18 PM
I'm so glad I'm a guy...

And this is why women give birth.

ETA: And why won't my daughter stay out of the bag of onions?

robeiae
03-03-2007, 10:21 PM
And this is why women give birth.Yep. If guys had to do it, the species would have gone extinct after the first generation.

tjwriter
03-03-2007, 10:22 PM
LOL.

I can't wait to do it again. This time it's going to be right, I swear.

robeiae
03-03-2007, 10:23 PM
I can't wait to do it again. This time it's going to be right, I swear.
I said that to my prom date.

Perks
03-03-2007, 10:24 PM
I'll tell you, it sounds bad and it's very, very intense, but a woman's body is built to do these things. One of the most annoying comments I hear all the time, directed at men, is "oh guys could never handle childbirth." Of course they could, if they were so designed.

It's one of the things that interests me about midwifery. I'm no granola crunching basher of armpit-shaving who thinks we should all go squat in the woods to birth our children (although, that said, I've met some very cool people who advocate that very sort of thing and some people love it.) We can have air-conditioning and nice fluffy towels and music if we'd like, but we are, for the most part and left to our own devices, built to do this. Sometimes it's harder and scarier than others and no one is guaranteed any particular outcome. And god bless the doctors and interventions where they're truly needed. But it's a very normal process.

PeeDee, seriously, with less fiddling and constraints, it's most often not that bad.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 10:25 PM
I believe you, but I'm just going to believe you from way over here.

Mostly, I just keep remembering that episode of Sliders when all the guys were pregnant...

tjwriter
03-03-2007, 10:29 PM
I'll tell you, it sounds bad and it's very, very intense, but a woman's body is built to do these things. One of the most annoying comments I hear all the time, directed at men, is "oh guys could never handle childbirth." Of course they could, if they were so designed.

I know and I completely agree with you, but over time I've noticed that guys get squeamish about pain and the not-so-pretties tons faster than women do. In fact, you could go into the utmost detail and I'd be fascinated and never grossed out.

It's one of the things that interests me about midwifery. I'm no granola crunching basher of armpit-shaving who thinks we should all go squat in the woods to birth our children (although, that said, I've met some very cool people who advocate that very sort of thing and some people love it.) We can have air-conditioning and nice fluffy towels and music if we'd like, but we are, for the most part and left to our own devices, built to do this. Sometimes it's harder and scarier than others and no one is guaranteed any particular outcome. And god bless the doctors and interventions where they're truly needed. But it's a very normal process.

PeeDee, seriously, with less fiddling and constraints, it's most often not that bad.

And, again, I agree with you. Women have been doing this for how many years now? There is a time and a place for medical intervention, but most of the time it's unnecessary. The rules and restrictions they place on childbirth are a pain. Do you know how bad I wanted food and drink while I labored for 26 1/2 hours? And that's not even based on solid science, but one guy's idea. Like I've mentioned before, I'd love to have a midwife and a birthing center in this area.

Rolling Thunder
03-03-2007, 10:30 PM
Tell your wife you're hoping for triplets, Pete. I dare you.

Perks
03-03-2007, 10:34 PM
Do you know how bad I wanted food and drink while I labored for 26 1/2 hours? And do you know that you can have it? They cannot prevent you. I took in with me a thermos of chicken broth, a box of crackers and several bottles of Rescue Remedy infused water. Just put it in your bag and nibble and sip when you can. And DO NOT let them hook you up to a damned IV. Flooding your system with glucose water promotes all kinds of swelling (not good for the cervix) and blood sugar fluctuations in mom and baby. I compromised with a heparin lock - they put a shunt in your hand with a drop of heparin to keep it clear and, that way, should you need an IV, you're good to go.

Find yourself a midwife with hospital privileges or do a home birth, unless you're ill. PM me any time. I love to rant about this stuff.

Haggis
03-03-2007, 10:37 PM
(The cyst was benign, btw. It was composed of Wharton's jelly, the stuff that the umbilical cord is made of.)


Wharton's jelly? Is that anything like quince or gooseberry?

tjwriter
03-03-2007, 10:40 PM
Oh, really?

They hooked me up to an IV in Observation before they admitted me, saying I was dehydrated. Well of course I hadn't had much in the way of fluids because I had only been awake a couple of hours.

I've looked, and I don't think we have any midwives around here. The women's hospital works with them I believe, if they are available. They have an option on the "Search by Specialty" screen, but it brings up no results.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 10:46 PM
I'd midwife for you, but....*ahem*....I don't know nothin' bout birthin' no babies!

I've been waiting all this time to use that quote.

Perks
03-03-2007, 10:49 PM
Oh, really?

They hooked me up to an IV in Observation before they admitted me, saying I was dehydrated. Well of course I hadn't had much in the way of fluids because I had only been awake a couple of hours.

I've looked, and I don't think we have any midwives around here. The women's hospital works with them I believe, if they are available. They have an option on the "Search by Specialty" screen, but it brings up no results.
And they'll tell you you're dehydrated whether you are or not. They, just like any other assembly line business, do things because "that's the way they're done." Grrr.

You should call the woman's hospital. If you're healthy, the midwifery experience is so much better and I've done both. (And I loved my doctor as a gyn, but for babies? Midwifery is the way to go.)

Birol
03-03-2007, 10:52 PM
TJ, I did a quick Google and found a couple (http://www.cfmidwifery.org/states/states.asp?ST=19) of links (http://indianamidwives.net/) (that you may have, admittedly, already checked out.)

If there's no one listed in your area, you might want to contact the directory people anyway and see if they know of any practicing midwives in your area who choose not to be listed.

tjwriter
03-03-2007, 11:01 PM
Thanks for looking. I just live in a bass ackwards part of the state. I'm going to interview doctors, ask nurses and all the business as I start looking for a new doc. I'll have to find one that's closest to a midwife.

Our AW member midwife also said she didn't know of any midwives in this part of the state. It looks like the closest is 2-3 hours away.

writerterri
03-03-2007, 11:08 PM
During the birth of my first, my wife was going through a contraction when I harmlessly asked "How do you feel?" Sheesz...

During one of my contractions I yelled at my husband, "I'm never having sex with you again!"

He just stood there blinking at me wondering if I really meant it or not. I actually saw him go limp.

Three weeks later he talked me into it again. I'm a sucker.

Southern_girl29
03-03-2007, 11:11 PM
During one of my contractions I yelled at my husband, "I'm never having sex with you again!"

He just stood there blinking at me wondering if I really meant it or not. I actually saw him go limp.

Three weeks later he talked me into it again. I'm a sucker.

Three weeks? No way? I couldn't have done it at three weeks if my life depended on it.

If we hadn't been in a hospital, I probably would have died. My blood pressure went to stroke level and without the magnesium, I probably would have had a stroke. However, I had an evil doctor, and I plan to do a lot of research to find a good one. I'm scared to go with a midwife in case my blood pressure does the same thing again.

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 11:11 PM
During one of my contractions I yelled at my husband, "I'm never having sex with you again!"

He just stood there blinking at me wondering if I really meant it or not. I actually saw him go limp.

Three weeks later he talked me into it again. I'm a sucker.

Geeze. Your husband's a machine!

(there were other phrases-you-shouldn't-have-used in there, but I have far too much taste to highlight them.)

Serena Casey
03-03-2007, 11:14 PM
Hmmm. Sarina's going to be one well-educated baby if this thread is saved for her. ;)

PeeDee
03-03-2007, 11:17 PM
We can teach her about the world!

It wont' do any good, and it'll all be hearsay, but we can teach her about the world! There will be no danger of scam publishers!

paprikapink
03-03-2007, 11:30 PM
I'm going to totally do that to my wife. :D

PETE:"Honey?"

WIFE: "NNNNNGGGG what??"

PETE: "I was thinking of sending out that short story I wrote last night to Weird Magazine later today, do you think we can afford the postage?"

WIFE: "VICIOUS SWEARING AND SCREAMING"

PETE: "Geeze! Okay! It can go to Realms of Fantasy too, if you're going to get grumpypants about it...! GAWD!"

WIFE: "CURSING LINEAGE AND CAMELS"

PETE: "If you didn't like the story, just say so."

This ^ is an amusing thought, but I predict that when the time comes, your short story will be as far from your mind as it will be from Mrs. PeeDee's. Maybe not true of all hubbies, but I'm guessing you, Pete, will be all the way swept up in the moment too.

roach
03-03-2007, 11:32 PM
During one of my contractions I yelled at my husband, "I'm never having sex with you again!"

He just stood there blinking at me wondering if I really meant it or not. I actually saw him go limp.

Three weeks later he talked me into it again. I'm a sucker.

Heh... When I was at the last part, the nurse had me push in sets of three. So I'd push and my husband would say, "Okay, one more." And I'd push and my husband would say, "Okay, one more." Every frickin' set. Finally, when I caught my breath, I turned to him and said, "I can count you know!" :D

Go Jenna Go!

tjwriter
03-03-2007, 11:38 PM
LOL.

When it came time for me to push, I had the nurse from hell, who seemed to think that I didn't need oxygen. She would give me a hard time for sucking in a quick breath for me between pushes. But if I didn't do that, I didn't have anything to back the push up with.

My sweet, dear husband fanned me with his hat the whole time I pushed. Which felt lovely.

stormie
03-03-2007, 11:42 PM
Finally, when I caught my breath, I turned to him and said, "I can count you know!" :D
LOL!

Chumplet
03-04-2007, 12:09 AM
During one of my contractions I yelled at my husband, "I'm never having sex with you again!"

During the stitching of my episiotomy, my husband yelled, "I'm never having sex with that again!"

Obviously, he changed his mind five weeks later. Well, maybe ten weeks later.

I see PeeDee's eyes crossing now.

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 12:11 AM
hold me

Perks
03-04-2007, 12:11 AM
Do not even get me started on episiotomies. Might as well let Edward ******* Scissorhands deliver babies. Grrrr.

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 12:11 AM
Do not even get me started on episiotomies. Might as well let Edward ******* Scissorhands deliver babies. Grrrr.

kill me

Ol' Fashioned Girl
03-04-2007, 12:14 AM
Someday, when all this is behind us, I'll confess the real reason(s) I decided to never have children...

wyntermoon
03-04-2007, 12:15 AM
I shot babies out so fast I never had time for an epi, number four almost bounced off the table. Number three didn't have time for the gooey stuff, she flew out like a cannonball. Number five came out while I was laying sideways screaming that the nurse had a questionable lineage because she told me I didn't know what I was doing and it was too soon. ??????????

Jenna -- push 'er out, shove 'er out, waaaaaaaaaaaay out!

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 12:16 AM
I shot babies out so fast I never had time for an epi, number four almost bounced off the table. Number three didn't have time for the gooey stuff, she flew out like a cannonball. Number five came out while I was laying sideways screaming that the nurse had a questionable lineage because she told me I didn't know what I was doing and it was too soon. ??????????
Jenna -- push 'er out, shove 'er out, waaaaaaaaaaaay out!

*faints*

Greenwolf103
03-04-2007, 12:16 AM
Do not even get me started on episiotomies. Might as well let Edward ******* Scissorhands deliver babies. Grrrr.

Ah, yes. Episiotomies. *shudders*

While in the delivery room, in between screaming and pushing, I suddenly turned my head and bit the hand of my then-fiance. (He still married me, anyway. LOL)

Shwebb
03-04-2007, 12:36 AM
With my first, I had the nurses all counting and yelling at me to push.

With my second, I was pretty damned adamant that I'd push and I would breathe, too, when I felt like it! Oh, they get you the first time 'round, when you don't know quite what's going on.

Pete, talk to your wife's OB and see if he/she will let you catch the baby! My husband did that with our first--and with the second one, the OB actually let him deliver it. With our third, it was only the nurse and my husband in the room. I didn't give the doc enough time to get there. When the nurse realized I was delivering, she said, "Try not to push."

"I'm not making any promises," I told her.

"Yeah, okay. I understand."

Pete, it isn't the pregnancy and the labor/delivery part you need to worry about so much. It's the after!

(My husband and I, on the way home with our firstborn, both had the same thoughts. "Damn--you mean they're sending us home to take care of this baby?! Well, stupid people have kids and raise 'em all the time, so we should be able to do this.)

Perks
03-04-2007, 12:38 AM
A simple illustration of the evils of episiotomy as any sort of routine birthing aid:

Take a piece of cloth. Now pull it as taught as you can. Go ahead, stretch that sucker as far as it'll go. Now have someone take a scissor to it anywhere along that edge... ah... now you see. Under that tension, that fabric's gonna rip from the shiny edge of the scissor blade to, well, ahem, yeah. Way back there.

Episiotomies should be reserved for emergencies and deflections of natural tears that are threatening the urethra and, well, other super sensitive parts. They are a bad, bad, bad idea in most cases and became routine because women numbed by epidurals cannot usually adjust their positions to optimize gravity and their natural elasticity to accommodate a big ole' baby head.

Your body knows how big it is. It's actually pretty rare that it'll grow a baby it can't squeeze out. Now, numb to the armpits and flat on your back, well, yeah, it could be a problem, but believe me, you pay one way or the other - either there on the bed or later in a sitz bath stitched up from here to yonder.

And here's for anyone that says, "Oh I only needed a teeny episiotomy." Unlikely. If you didn't rip after being cut, then you probably weren't going to rip anyway. For some reason, doctors in the United States just cut. My doctor actually said that to me when I asked, "Please don't cut me." He looked me in the eye and said, "I cut everyone." No lie.

Sheryl Nantus
03-04-2007, 12:39 AM
*looks in*

*goes pale*

*remembers why she loves being an aunt, but will never have kids*

*runs away*

later!

Shwebb
03-04-2007, 12:39 AM
Perks, you know you could sue that doc for doing that?

Seriously.

eldragon
03-04-2007, 12:42 AM
They just cut to keep it from tearing because it's easier to sew a cut than it is to sew a tear.

If it does tear, it is harder to sew up correctly, so they cut it to be on the safe side.

Unfortunately, alot of medical care now days is just preventative : meaing the doctors are trying to prevent a lawsuit.

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 12:43 AM
This is why I avoid doctors at all costs. Honestly. For being a people-geared industry, you think they'd be nicer...

eldragon
03-04-2007, 12:46 AM
OB/Gyn's are sued more than any other doctors. They have their guidelines to adhere to avoid lawsuits. Their yearly premiums for malpractice insurance are God awful. (I heard a figure so high I don't dare repeat it.)


They do things because they have to, or they'll be sued.

Perks
03-04-2007, 12:47 AM
Yeah, I couldn't believe it. And it was a doctor I liked. I just thought, after all I'd learned, I'd be able to stand up for myself, but come time, I was as meek as could be.

And when I talked to them later about it, they said, "You had a pain free delivery and a healthy baby!" like I had any right to complain about having to crawl up the stairs on my hands and knees for three weeks afterwards.

When my midwife examined me, she told me (PeeDee cover your eyes) that I was a "ripper" and should never be cut unless it was an emergency. Some women are more prone to tears and that situation can be managed. Which we did. I ripped all over the place the second time, but along natural collagen lines that healed in a few days with much, much less pain than a surgical tear.

And just so that doesn't sound too scary happening with no anesthetic, not to worry. You know how if you sit on your foot for an hour it'll be dead numb? More or less the same thing here. I mostly did not feel that when it was happening.

I cannot believe I'm telling you all this. Lol!

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 12:48 AM
....haha......hah......ha.....

herm.....heh....?


I....heh.....I look forward to reading to my baby....haha!

we could...you know....talk about....that................

Haggis
03-04-2007, 12:49 AM
I broke a finger once.

Perks
03-04-2007, 12:50 AM
They do things because they have to, or they'll be sued.This is not strictly true. Much of the nonsense in the US medical model of childbirth is there, because at a time, these things like routine episotomies, mandatory IVs and much of the silliness were thought to be good ideas. Studies have not borne out these ideas as helpful, but challenging "because that's the way it's done" is an uphill battle.

Birol
03-04-2007, 12:52 AM
(My husband and I, on the way home with our firstborn, both had the same thoughts. "Damn--you mean they're sending us home to take care of this baby?! Well, stupid people have kids and raise 'em all the time, so we should be able to do this.)

An acquaintance of mine actually took her firstborn into a pet store and asked, "Can I exchange him for a puppy?"

They said no.

He's a pretty normal teenager these days.

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 12:57 AM
An acquaintance of mine actually took her firstborn into a pet store and asked, "Can I exchange him for a puppy?"

They said no.

He's a pretty normal teenager these days.

My wife is pretty good at The Sims 2. I'm hoping those skills are applicable...

limitedtimeauthor
03-04-2007, 12:59 AM
So, hey. Just cheking in...

Are we all still chit-chatting in the waiting room? No cute baby pics yet?

ltd.

eldragon
03-04-2007, 01:01 AM
This is not strictly true. Much of the nonsense in the US medical model of childbirth is there, because at a time, these things like routine episotomies, mandatory IVs and much of the silliness were thought to be good ideas. Studies have not borne out these ideas as helpful, but challenging "because that's the way it's done" is an uphill battle.
Regardless, most ob/gyns are sued an average of twice during their careers. They pay close to $100,000 per year in malpractice insurance. (I looked it up.)


I had a shit ob/gyn the first time around. He was terrible and in fact, was banned from the hospital I delivered at and I had to hire another doctor to deliver my baby when I was in labor. My doctor lost his license to practice a few months after I delivered the baby. I had severe toxemia and he never noticed. He never prescribed prenatal vitamins or told me to take any.

When I complained of severe nausea that went on all day and night for weeks, he said, "I don't want to abort this baby!"

I started going to him at 6 weeks, and almost 9 months later he told me I had an additional 6 weeks to go, that there was no way I was due as originally thought, because I was too little. Even though it was all documented in my charts - from April to December I had been diligently visiting - he pushed my due date to the end of January. (My original due date was December 11th.)

He didn't bother sending me for an ultrasound because we had crappy insurance. I didn't/couldn't afford another doctor because we had hardly any money and had been making payments to him for the duration of the pregnancy.

When I delivered, on December 23rd - 12 days past my original due date - I had an emergency c-section because of my high toxemia and the cord was wrapped around my daughter's neck. She weighed 4.3 lbs but wasn't premature - instead suffered from "inter-uterine growth retardation."

The doctor who performed the c-section just happened to be his son, and he charged me double the fee because he said I hadn't had adequate prenatal care, yet I had been to his father every single visit since I missed my first period.


My daughter was in neonatal for a week because of her size, but had no problems for about a month, when she was diagnosed with a heart defect. Within 6 months she was in the hospital with meningitis, in a coma for a week and in intensive care for a month.


To say I had a crappy doctor would be an understatement, but when you are poor and paying cash (because I've never been on any assistance in my life,) you take what you can get, not necessarily what you deserve.

That was 18 years ago and my daughter is about to graduate HS in May.

Perks
03-04-2007, 01:07 AM
Eldragon, the stats for malpractice are true and doctors will say that these routine interventions are a direct result of these stats, but the causal relationship is flawed and they don't bother to examine that. If the interventions are useless (and in some cases, actually harmful) they are not preventing any complications that would inspire a lawsuit.

And your experience sounds terrible. I'm so sorry that happened to you.

Shwebb
03-04-2007, 01:11 AM
That was, ironically, one reason why I went induction for all three kids. I wanted control of the labor/delivery, and my doc was one of the few around here who doesn't believe in routine episiotomies. He's surprisingly laid-back, for an ob/gyn. I wanted to know that he was going to be there, not some backward idiot control-freak who thinks he knows my body better than I do.

It amazes me how childbirth is one of those things that took huge steps backward as soon as men got involved with the process, from the medical standpoint.

Oh, and Pete? My husband began reading Winnie-the-Pooh stories to my kids every night while they were still growing inside my tummy. It was very wonderful.

Christine N.
03-04-2007, 01:11 AM
Still no baby?
Maybe Jenna needs some PHENTERMINE!

STAT!

stormie
03-04-2007, 01:18 AM
Still no baby?
Maybe Jenna needs some PHENTERMINE!

STAT!
Or maybe a shot or two of peppermint schnapps. That'd be my choice!

threedogpeople
03-04-2007, 01:24 AM
Forget the schnaps for Jenna - all of waiting should have a drink or two or???? Don't know if it will help us with the impatience but it can't hurt.

J

Perks
03-04-2007, 01:36 AM
It amazes me how childbirth is one of those things that took huge steps backward as soon as men got involved with the process, from the medical standpoint.


Midwifery fell out of favor for a very interesting and ironic reason. Before the late-ish 1700s, everyone just had their babies at home (or wherever they happened to be), but once cities started springing up all over the place, hospitals became much more accessible. Most anyone would admit that there are risks associated with childbirth, especially postpartum hemorrhage, and close hospitals saved many a life. So, it became fashionable, if one could afford it, to simply go to the hospital to have a baby "just in case."

This all coincided, unfortunately, with the infancy of mass media. Suddenly, among the upper class, women started dropping dead of 'puerperal fever' after childbirth and the massive dangers of childbirth became one of the first banners of sensationalistic journalism. 'If it bleeds, it leads' and all that. Everyone became terrified of childbirth and shunned midwives as not qualified to handle this most grave of all maladies.

And puerperal fever kept eating new mothers. It was a horrible infection and a gruesome way to die. You were thought mad to risk spitting out a baby unless there were a team of doctors standing by to shield you and coddle you through the treacherous recovery period.

Except it was the doctors who were killing them. This was before the advent of the germ theory and before Joseph Lister pioneered the simple hygienic practices of hand-washing and equipment sterilization to prevent infection. It was not unusual, at the time, to have a doctor who'd been up to the elbows in sick, dying (or indeed dead) patients, swab their arms free of blood, pus, feces and whatnot with the same rag they'd used all day and then send that same hand up a birth canal to check for dilation or to guide a stubborn baby out. Et voila - puerperal fever.

But the scare had so ingrained the fearful nature of childbirth in the psyches of developing industrial nations, that here we are, two hundred years later, still trying to ease the white-knuckled hold we want to place on this instinctual and inevitable process.

SherryTex
03-04-2007, 01:44 AM
Hope everything is okay.

SC Harrison
03-04-2007, 01:46 AM
Pete, it isn't the pregnancy and the labor/delivery part you need to worry about so much. It's the after!



You got that right, Shelly.

Pete, you need to get all the normal sleep you can before the baby comes. After that, you'll be sleeping in the shower; nodding off while leaning against the wall; waking up to find you've cut a snaking line across the front yard with your lawn mower; snapping awake and freaking out that you could go to sleep with a three week-old baby in your arms, etc.

You will be soooo tired, when you turn on the tv to catch up on the news or weather, it will seem like they're speaking in a foreign language. Even simple sentences will sound like Charlie Brown's teacher— "Waw waw, waw waw waw".

It's a beautiful experience. :0

Birol
03-04-2007, 01:52 AM
Pete, you need to get all the normal sleep you can....

I'm fascinated. What's this "normal" sleep of which you speak?

dclary
03-04-2007, 01:57 AM
This baby better be freakin' worth it. I hope it understands there are 50,000 AW members waiting for it to get here and be FANTASTIC!

aruna
03-04-2007, 02:00 AM
It amazes me how childbirth is one of those things that took huge steps backward as soon as men got involved with the process, from the medical standpoint.

.

That's why my second birth was a home birth with midwife. The episiostomy thing with the first birth (hospital, doctors, nurses telling me I had no milk) really opened my eyes.


But the scare had so ingrained the fearful nature of childbirth in the psyches of developing industrial nations, that here we are, two hundred years later, still trying to ease the white-knuckled hold we want to place on this instinctual, and inevitable process.

And the irony of it is that fear actually does make childbirth harder.

Anyway, I'm off to bed. As soon as the news comes through please wake me - any time!

Cath
03-04-2007, 02:09 AM
Right now I'm scared to say anything except "still pacing".

Freckles
03-04-2007, 02:10 AM
This is what happens when I don't check Office Party for a few days...GO, JENNA!!! I'm thinking of you, Anthony & Sarina! :)

Ol' Fashioned Girl
03-04-2007, 02:15 AM
You... can... go... DAYS without checking in? :)

KimJo
03-04-2007, 02:44 AM
No baby yet?!? I hope everything's going all right. Too bad Jenna can't read this thread; some of the posts would have her laughing so hard Sarina would come right out...

stormie
03-04-2007, 03:33 AM
Too bad Jenna can't read this thread; some of the posts would have her laughing so hard Sarina would come right out...
Hey, now there's a good idea! Someone: send a laptop to Jenna's room pronto. Let Anthony read these posts to her (except, of course, the ones about the stupid, ready-to-retire doctor I had) and she'll be laughing and Sarina will come out right away, all smiles and coos. Good birthing idea, KimJo!

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 03:39 AM
Yes, let's not read the "Ripping, tearing" posts to her....

When does the betting pool start?

Carole
03-04-2007, 03:43 AM
During the stitching of my episiotomy, my husband yelled, "I'm never having sex with that again!"

Obviously, he changed his mind five weeks later. Well, maybe ten weeks later.

I see PeeDee's eyes crossing now.
My ex was the opposite. His brother was in medical school at the time our first son was born. He asked him, "How soon after this can we have sex again?" His brother told him that we would just know and that it would be fine as soon as it felt good. Ex jerk grinned from ear to ear until I said, "He MEANT when it felt good for ME."

Chumplet
03-04-2007, 03:52 AM
Sorry, PeeDee, I'm gonna torture you some more. The episiotomy from my daughter's birth was apparently a favourite practice of gyno number one. I was sore for MONTHS! The stitches had to be done in two layers. No wonder my hubby didn't want anything to do with me.

Two years later, baby number two was picture perfect. No epidural, no episiotomy, no stirrups, even! Perfectly natural, by the book, in the labour room and in good time. In fact, it was almost fun! I remember going through my thoughts, "This is the part when this happens, and wow, it's really happening!" My darling son followed every rule from What To Expect When You're Expecting. I almost wanted to have another baby right away. That temporary insanity passed.

My second OB/GYN (a woman) said, "Who the hell did this stitching job?"
I said, "Dr. Newton".

She rolled her eyes as if she'd expected that answer and responded, "Well, we'll just tidy this up a little." She did a few teeny stitches and I was right as rain within a few days.

robeiae
03-04-2007, 03:54 AM
Right. I'm putting the lot of you on ignore.

stormie
03-04-2007, 04:05 AM
Wanna hear about my stupid, ready-to-retire doctor's idea of an episiotomy?

Mandy-Jane
03-04-2007, 04:15 AM
Well since everyone is doing it, I'll share my horror story as well. BE WARNED - THIS IS GRAPHIC! When my first baby was born, she kinda' just burst out all at once; none of this head first and then shoulders and then body. All at once. Consequently, tearing was extremely severe and I had to go into surgery to be stitched up. The worst part is, for two weeks afterwards, I couldn't even walk properly. Worse still, when I needed to poo, I couldn't wipe because the stitches went that far back. So I had to get into the shower, rinse with the hand-held part, and then dry with a hair dryer. It was just awful. My husband helped me sometimes too, which was sweet. Not surprisingly, he was in no hurry to get back on the saddle again (thank God, I say).

scarletpeaches
03-04-2007, 04:15 AM
I'm never getting married, and I'm gluing my legs together at the knees.

TsukiRyoko
03-04-2007, 04:20 AM
If you get pics, don't post any of the placenta.
I have an awesome picture of one of my friend's placentas. Funnest thing I've seen since someone was mauled by a goat.

TsukiRyoko
03-04-2007, 04:21 AM
Where's the baby where's the baby where's the baby where's the baby?!?!?!?!?

K1P1
03-04-2007, 04:39 AM
I'm never getting married, and I'm gluing my legs together at the knees.

What does that have to do with pregnancy, pray tell?

Southern_girl29
03-04-2007, 04:40 AM
Again, since everyone is sharing, I'll tell my horror story of tearing. I also had a child who came out all at once. I tore from stem to stern. She was stitching me up, and I could feel it. I told her and she said, "I'm stitching you in an extremely sensitive spot. You tore up to your urethra."

It wasn't nearly as bad as Mandy Jane's, but I had trouble for several weeks afterward.

Carrie in PA
03-04-2007, 04:50 AM
I delivered a 10 pound linebacker with no meds, no tearing, no episotomy. I had an excellent midwife (who worked with my excellent OB-GYN) who used some relaxation techniques that made the process relatively easy.

Since... yanno... we were all sharing... :D

JDCrayne
03-04-2007, 04:50 AM
I have an awesome picture of one of my friend's placentas. Funnest thing I've seen since someone was mauled by a goat.

Somewhere around here I have a picture of an elephant placenta. Talk about awesome!! Man, stir fry that with onions and you could feed Cincinatti.

scarletpeaches
03-04-2007, 04:51 AM
What does that have to do with pregnancy, pray tell?

For me, a lot. Doesn't apply to everyone I know, but it's entirely relevant in my case. ;)

Rolling Thunder
03-04-2007, 04:52 AM
I delivered a 10 pound linebacker with no meds, no tearing, no episotomy. I had an excellent midwife (who worked with my excellent OB-GYN) who used some relaxation techniques that made the process relatively easy.

Since... yanno... we were all sharing... :D

I delivered Pizzas, once or twice. It was tiring.

K1P1
03-04-2007, 04:53 AM
For me, a lot. Doesn't apply to everyone I know, but it's entirely relevant in my case. ;)

I meant the knees together part. :D

stormie
03-04-2007, 04:56 AM
Okay, it's now two days later, my fingernails are ripped (oops, shouldn't talk about ripping now), and NO WORD!! I mean, my first labor was three days, but stupid ready-to-retire doctor was playing golf.

Jenna, we're here for you! (Anthony, you too, of course.) Come on, Sarina!

scarletpeaches
03-04-2007, 04:57 AM
I meant the knees together part. :D

It prevents invasion by dinkle. :D

thethinker42
03-04-2007, 05:01 AM
It prevents invasion by dinkle. :D

That all depends on how you're positioned. Hehehehe. Knees together does NOT necessarily prevent Dinkle Invasion.

Jean Marie
03-04-2007, 05:04 AM
That all depends on how you're positioned. Hehehehe. Knees together does NOT necessarily prevent Dinkle Invasion.
How's Jenna gonna explain dinkle invasion to poor Sarina? If she keeps this thread, that is :D

samgail
03-04-2007, 05:04 AM
I had to have c-sections with mine yet i still almost faint and literally cringe and shiver with fear when someone says epesiotomy.

I think it might be time for some shots, the boys are all looking a little green and i think we might have worn a path from all the pacing. Let's get some sandwiches and a big pot of coffee too.

thethinker42
03-04-2007, 05:05 AM
How's Jenna gonna explain dinkle invasion to poor Sarina? If she keeps this thread, that is :D

I'm sure they make some sort of After School Special that explains it. Or some sort of "Baby Einstein Explores Sexual Positions" DVD.

Jean Marie
03-04-2007, 05:08 AM
I'm sure they make some sort of After School Special that explains it. Or some sort of "Baby Einstein Explores Sexual Positions" DVD.
Right, I've seen the new Leap Frog edition. It's great :D

scarletpeaches
03-04-2007, 05:09 AM
That all depends on how you're positioned. Hehehehe. Knees together does NOT necessarily prevent Dinkle Invasion.

Knees together prevents dinkle invasion in the front bottom. I've got a rectal chastity belt ready to stop them going round the back way.

thethinker42
03-04-2007, 05:10 AM
Right, I've seen the new Leap Frog edition. It's great :D

I thought that one was a little heavy on the technical info, but it'll do. I hear "Kama Sutra Junior" is out next year.

thethinker42
03-04-2007, 05:11 AM
Knees together prevents dinkle invasion in the front bottom. I've got a rectal chastity belt ready to stop them going round the back way.

I didn't mean rectally....yikes. Hellz no.

LOL

But go ahead and glue 'em. Then Joaquin will have all the more reason to come to ME.

scarletpeaches
03-04-2007, 05:12 AM
Bah!

Chumplet
03-04-2007, 05:13 AM
Why do Canadians do it doggie style?
So they can both watch the hockey game.

thethinker42
03-04-2007, 05:15 AM
Bah!

Ya know, living in Scotland and all, I'd be careful making THAT sound no matter how well your knees are glued.

thethinker42
03-04-2007, 05:16 AM
Why do Canadians do it doggie style?
So they can both watch the hockey game.

"...and we can do it doggy style so we can both watch X-Files..."

Name THAT tune...

threedogpeople
03-04-2007, 05:22 AM
I've always thought that Jenna was a super achiever and that this little miss was going to be one of t...h..o..s..e stories - you know - the ones that start: 'Our baby was almost 9 pounds but I was only in labor for 45 minutes and I thought it was indigestion...'

I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE....I'M GOING TO GO COOK DINNER AND TRY TO KEEP FROM CHECKING THIS THREAD UNTIL TOMORROW MORNING...

(still praying though) "Lord, please watch over this family and make sure that all are healthy. We know that we should be patient and know that Sarina will come 'in your time' and not in ours but, Lord, we are getting impatient and would appreciate it if she could make her entrance very soon. Please help Jenna and Anthony keep their sense of humor, awe and wonder and to feel the presence of your love and ours at the magical moment when Sarina joins their family. Thank you for caring about all of us."

PS - No disrespect intended for anyone out there that don't share my beliefs. Please consider the above as a request for good wishes and sending positive energy to the family.

threedogpeople
03-04-2007, 05:23 AM
"...and we can do it doggy style so we can both watch X-Files..."

Name THAT tune...


BTW - that is NOT true it's because it is too cold to take off more cloths to do it another way!!! :tongue

thethinker42
03-04-2007, 05:25 AM
BTW - that is NOT true it's because it is too cold to take off more cloths to do it another way!!! :tongue

HA! Guess that depends on where you live. LOL Or you could try turning the heat on...

Chumplet
03-04-2007, 06:02 AM
I meant on the television, not at the hockey rink. Then all the fans would be watching the stands instead of the players.

eldragon
03-04-2007, 06:19 AM
Jenna most certainly had the baby but her husband just doesn't have time to logon or something.

She posted the first and this is the third. Something has happened by now.

kristie911
03-04-2007, 06:19 AM
Okay, I was away for, like, maybe 4 hours and you all spit out 4 pages! And still no baby! But I did enjoy all the baby stories, so now I'll throw in mine:

I walked around dilated to 5 for almost 2 weeks, no contractions. Finally, while I was getting a routine check (2 weeks before my due date) my OB told me I was having strong contractions...oops, I had no idea. So off to the hospital I went, contractions every 5 minutes and I went up to a 6 and then 7 pretty quickly. Then I stalled. Dr broke my water and all of a sudden, holy shit, contractions hurt! Got my epidural (I nearly kissed my OB on the lips when that sucker kicked in...loved my epidural) and some pitocin because I was still stalled. Within an hour I was dilated to 10cm...oh boy, ready to push. I pushed for 2 freakin' hours...pushing with every contraction. Finally I was so exhausted I was falling asleep after each contraction (or was I passing out?). Dr gave me an episiotomy and my boy came out on the next push.

I nearly kissed my OB on the lips again for that...I don't know how much long I could have kept it up. I was exhausted. It healed quick and I didn't have any problems. So not all interventions are evil...

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 06:20 AM
Jenna most certainly had the baby but her husband just doesn't have time to logon or something.

She posted the first and this is the third. Something has happened by now.

I sincerely hope so, and I hope it's nothing bad.

writerterri
03-04-2007, 06:37 AM
Three weeks? No way? I couldn't have done it at three weeks if my life depended on it.

If we hadn't been in a hospital, I probably would have died. My blood pressure went to stroke level and without the magnesium, I probably would have had a stroke. However, I had an evil doctor, and I plan to do a lot of research to find a good one. I'm scared to go with a midwife in case my blood pressure does the same thing again.


I had a c-section and I was worried about an infection but didn't get one. Plus he had to do a lot of persuading. He's an animal, what can I say. The dork.


Midwives are prepared for that type of thing especially if you give them your history. If your pressure goes up they will send you to the hospital. And I think you can have your midwife come to the hospital with you.

writerterri
03-04-2007, 06:39 AM
Geeze. Your husband's a machine!

(there were other phrases-you-shouldn't-have-used in there, but I have far too much taste to highlight them.)



His body! His body went limp. Okay, my bad. Dork.

roach
03-04-2007, 07:45 AM
Since we're sharing birthing stories ...

I had my first contractions about 3 in the morning. But since I had read all these articles about how first time mothers can be mistaken and think they're having contractions when they're not, I kept mum. When my husband wakes up I casually mention that I think I'm having contractions, he gets a little panicky, decides not to go into work and we wait till eight o'clock to call the doctor. The doctor says, wait until the contractions are more severe. "When you can't talk through one give me a call back." Obviously he missed the part on the patient history where I pointed out I come from a family that can talk through anything.

Soooo....nine o'clock comes and goes, ten o'clock...I'm getting antsy. I keep thinking, "If my water broke they'd have to admit me to the hospital." So I start doing some heavy duty cleaning thinking that'd do the trick. I go out into the backyard, fill up a five gallon bucket with water to put in the dog dooley. I waddle across the yard with this bucket, dump half of it in the dooley and feel a gush down my legs. "Hot damn!" I think, "I did it!"

So I waddle back into the house ready to call the doctor and all of the sudden I think, "How do I know my water broke? What if I just peed myself?" Well amniotic fluid is supposed to smell sweet and pee smells like pee, right? I go into my bedroom, remove my sweats and start sniffing them. At that point my husband walks in and asks, "WTF?" I explain myself, call my doctor again and this time he tells me to go to the hospital. (I'm guessing he's decided that pants sniffing is a sign of mental instability brought on by pregnancy and telling me to go to the hospital will give me something to do.)

All the way to the hospital I'm ranting to my husband about how if it turns out I peed myself I'm going to be Very Annoyed. We get to the hospital, they check me out and say, "Ayup, you're having your baby."

"So does that mean my water broke?" I ask hopefully. Uh-uh they inform me, the sac is still intact, confirming that all I did was pee myself.

And that is why childbirth is icky and gross and not at all the glowing, life-is-beautiful event all the movies and books make it out to be. :P

MacAllister
03-04-2007, 07:48 AM
Jenna called, she's fine, she had a fine, healthy perfect baby girl at approximately 3:30 pm eastern time, March 2nd. The baby was 8 pounds, 5 ounces, and 22 inches long. She's godzilla. But with hair.

Jenna and Baby are happy, healthy and will be going home tomorrow!

(In all the excitement, they forgot the phone list on the counter, so Jenna sent Anthony home today to fetch it. :D )

MajorDrums
03-04-2007, 07:49 AM
WOOHOO!! Welcome to the world, Sarina!!

jvc
03-04-2007, 07:50 AM
That's great news, Mac.

Congratulations Jenna, all the best to you, Little Baby Serina, and of course to the happy father, Anthony.

eldragon
03-04-2007, 07:53 AM
Excellent! Welcome Sarina and congratulations Jenna and Anthony!

Dawno
03-04-2007, 07:59 AM
Yippee!!!

Glenda
03-04-2007, 08:00 AM
Whew, the baby is here. Now the hard part begins. Sleepless nights, dirty diapers, constant eating. Gone are the quite peaceful days and nights. And all that is before she begins to walk and talk. :ROFL:

Cath
03-04-2007, 08:02 AM
Woo Hoo!

Fantastic news.

Welcome to the world, Sarina. :)

Shwebb
03-04-2007, 08:02 AM
Wow! That's a nice-sized baby!

Can't wait to see some pictures!

And to hear Jenna's own story of how the delivery went.

Southern_girl29
03-04-2007, 08:02 AM
Welcome to the world, Sarina, and congratulations to Jenna and Anthony. That is a big baby.

louisgodwin
03-04-2007, 08:03 AM
Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony! Happy birthday Sarina!

KimJo
03-04-2007, 08:05 AM
Hooray!!!! Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony!

Mandy-Jane
03-04-2007, 08:09 AM
Oh wow, that is so exciting!

Now we all have to get back to actually writing again....

Jo
03-04-2007, 08:21 AM
Yay! Congrats to the new family, Jenna, Anthony and Sarina. :Hug2:

benbradley
03-04-2007, 08:21 AM
Whew, the baby is here. Now the hard part begins. Sleepless nights, dirty diapers, constant eating. Gone are the quite peaceful days and nights. And all that is before she begins to walk and talk. :ROFL:
The hard part for me was reading through all these gross-and-explicit medical posts. I think I'd rather do a free diaper change than to have read through them all. And now it's all over - yet another reason to be happy Jenna finally had her baby.

ChunkyC
03-04-2007, 08:27 AM
Whoohoo! :hooray: Welcome to the world, Sarina! Congrats Jenna and Anthony!

The wait was worth it just to watch PeeDee squirm over all the stories, lol!

Carole
03-04-2007, 08:28 AM
The hard part for me was reading through all these gross-and-explicit medical posts.
That's all part of bringing a baby into the world. Even with the medical procedure stuff it's normal, natural and just how it happens.

Chumplet
03-04-2007, 08:41 AM
:hooray: Whoo Hoo! Happy Baby Day!

SC Harrison
03-04-2007, 08:47 AM
Jenna called, she's fine, she had a fine, healthy perfect baby girl at approximately 3:30 pm eastern time, March 2nd. The baby was 8 pounds, 5 ounces, and 22 inches long. She's godzilla. But with hair.

Jenna and Baby are happy, healthy and will be going home tomorrow!

(In all the excitement, they forgot the phone list on the counter, so Jenna sent Anthony home today to fetch it. :D )

Yaaaaaay!

Welcome to the world, Sarina. You've already made it a better place, and I can't imagine all the things you will do in the coming years. :)

billythrilly7th
03-04-2007, 08:51 AM
Thank god, Thrillina Glatzer has finally arrived.

Congrats, Jenna and everyone else who had a part in this pregnancy and birth.

tlblack
03-04-2007, 08:56 AM
Congratulations Jenna and Anthony. Happy birthday Sarina!!!

samgail
03-04-2007, 08:58 AM
I had to sneak into the office from a dinner party to check and I am so glad i did!
Congratulations to you and your family Jenna-You did it!!!!
Sam

robeiae
03-04-2007, 09:06 AM
:welcome: Sarina.

:partyguy: Happy birthday!

rhymegirl
03-04-2007, 09:15 AM
Jenna and Baby are happy, healthy and will be going home tomorrow!

That is super news! Thank you for telling us, Mac. :)

roach
03-04-2007, 09:26 AM
Yay! Welcome to the world, Sarina! And congratulations to Jenna and Anthony!

aruna
03-04-2007, 09:31 AM
Ah! The relief! Getting up early today was worth it!

Welcome, Sarina! See, you are a much wanted baby, not only by your immediate family but a huge, crazy extended family spread out all over the world!:e2arms:
When I read Mac's words tears sprang into my eyes - a birth is always such a miracle, such a huge, amazing thing; a new little human in the world!

Good Word
03-04-2007, 09:33 AM
Absolutelywonderfullyfabulouslyterrificallyamazing ly grand!

aruna
03-04-2007, 09:35 AM
That's all part of bringing a baby into the world. Even with the medical procedure stuff it's normal, natural and just how it happens.

One of the by-products of birth control is that people (not just men!) forget that birth is the natural and in fact intended result of sex... the other side of the coin, as it were! So it's good to take one's head out of the sand now and then.:e2coffee:

It was easy to ignore the baby talk thread, right, guys? We didn't let you off so easy with this one!

JenNipps
03-04-2007, 09:37 AM
Jenna called, she's fine, she had a fine, healthy perfect baby girl at approximately 3:30 pm eastern time, March 2nd. The baby was 8 pounds, 5 ounces, and 22 inches long. She's godzilla. But with hair

I told myself I had to finish whatever I was going to accomplish tonight (6 pages!!! woohoo!) before I could come check in.

So, since I'm done..........

:hooray:

I think Sarina is a beautiful name. (According to a baby-name site I've been researching name origins and meanings at, "Sarina" means "princess.")

Shweta
03-04-2007, 09:47 AM
Yay baby!
Congratulations Jenna and welcome Sarina and yay to Anthony too :)

K1P1
03-04-2007, 10:24 AM
Wahoo! Now, go cuddle up and get some sleep.

LizzieGirl
03-04-2007, 10:52 AM
Jenna called, she's fine, she had a fine, healthy perfect baby girl at approximately 3:30 pm eastern time, March 2nd. The baby was 8 pounds, 5 ounces, and 22 inches long. She's godzilla. But with hair.

Jenna and Baby are happy, healthy and will be going home tomorrow!

(In all the excitement, they forgot the phone list on the counter, so Jenna sent Anthony home today to fetch it. :D )

Ok so I am younger then I bet all of you with a birth story so I will use my own. 8lbs 5oz that is big compared to what I was when I was born anyway. I was 3lbs 8 oz. Ok so I descided to join the world in October when I was supose to wait until December. I was a 32 weeker.

Glad Sarina is healthy and home by now I bet. Hope you take as many pictures as my mom does and hope we get to see some of them. Come back when you can Jenna.

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 10:53 AM
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *DEEP BREATH* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!


Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony! And, er, I'd congratulate Sarina, but she didn't really do very much yet... :D



The wait was worth it just to watch PeeDee squirm over all the stories, lol!

My wife had no sympathy when I complained to her either. She said I should read them carefully. I whimpered and went back to writing.

aruna
03-04-2007, 11:07 AM
My wife had no sympathy when I complained to her either. She said I should read them carefully. I whimpered and went back to writing.

Looks like you're going to need some serious hand-holding and back-rubbing when your time comes!!!


(naw; by then we'll have prepared you thoroughly)

PeeDee
03-04-2007, 11:09 AM
sorry, didn't quite catch that! I have to go......knit something.....for Jenna!

Old Hack
03-04-2007, 12:10 PM
Ah, wonderful news. Welcome, Sarina. And Jenna and Anthony--grab all the sleep you can!

alleycat
03-04-2007, 01:32 PM
Gee, couldn't she have waited a few more hours and then Sarina and I would have shared the same birthday. I mean, it would have only been seven more hours of labor; how hard could that have been?

:-) (just teasing)

Congratulations, Jenna. I'll look forward to seeing a picture of her in the Peas outfit in a few weeks.

wyntermoon
03-04-2007, 04:09 PM
:partyguy: :partyguy: :partyguy:

Hurrah!!!! Happy Birthday, Sarina!!!

moth
03-04-2007, 04:15 PM
Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay! :snoopy: :hooray:

Welcome Sarina, and congratulations Jenna and Anthony! Every single one of you is blessed and lucky to have the others. You're just at the beginning of the adventure. :e2grouphu

Serenity
03-04-2007, 04:17 PM
:welcome: Welcome to this crazy writer's world, Sarina!

Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony!

Ol' Fashioned Girl
03-04-2007, 04:25 PM
At last! Thank goodness! Welcome to the world, Sarina! Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony!

astonwest
03-04-2007, 04:29 PM
So it's good to take one's head out of the sand now and then.I don't think having one's head in the *sand* was what made all this happen...

I think it would probably be much more fun to jump in at around 3-4 months old...at least they sleep through most of the night.

Welcome, Sarina...our new little one says hi, and wants to know what you're going to be doing in, say, about 16 years...

Unique
03-04-2007, 04:31 PM
:e2flowers Welcome baby Sarina.

Jenna & Anthony -:Clap:


next week -:e2drunk:

kristie911
03-04-2007, 04:42 PM
Welcome baby Sarina! Congrats Jenna and Anthony! I'm so happy for both of you!

And I hate to say it...but now the hard (and fun) part starts! :)

Christine N.
03-04-2007, 04:45 PM
Yay!
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday to you
Happy Birthday, dear Sarina
Happy Birthday to.......YOU!!!!!!

aadams73
03-04-2007, 05:35 PM
Yay! Congratulations to Mom and Dad!! And welcome, Sarina. May you have a long, healthy, and very happy life!

SherryTex
03-04-2007, 05:48 PM
Congratulations! Welcome welcome welcome Sarina

TsukiRyoko
03-04-2007, 05:54 PM
Baby's here baby's here baby's here baby's here! I want to see a picture of the new torture victi- er, bundle of joy. Lemme seee!!!! I wanna hold it! Wait, I can't. For one thing, it's the friggin internet (forget that sometimes), and two, I'm accident prone. Okay, I'm fine with simply e-poking at Sarina, then. Babbyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :hooray:

tjwriter
03-04-2007, 05:58 PM
Woohoo!

Congratulations Jenna and Anthony! Welcome Baby Sarina!

This is where the hard part is. I set up a baby station in the living room and that's where I stayed most nights after Piper was born. Of course, the husband worked thirds then, so he didn't care where we slept.

Perks
03-04-2007, 06:17 PM
Congratulations and yay! I have to say that bringing home the first child was the most surreal experience I've ever had. Weirder than pregnancy, more alien than delivery, just... out there.

Have fun and take care!

Haggis
03-04-2007, 06:26 PM
WooHooo! I'm an uncle. Er...sort of.

Big time congrats, Jenna.:hooray:

TsukiRyoko
03-04-2007, 06:29 PM
WooHooo! I'm an uncle. Er...sort of.


Check again, Haggis. Mac said something about the baby being born with a syringe clenched between her gums.

Perks
03-04-2007, 06:53 PM
My daughter wanted to remind Jenna that Sarina was born on Dr. Seuss' birthday.

And we will like her on a train
And we will like her in the rain
And in the dark, and up a tree
She is so cute and sweet, you see

Haggis
03-04-2007, 06:55 PM
Check again, Haggis. Mac said something about the baby being born with a syringe clenched between her gums.

She's kidding, Anthony. Really. I mean it. Honest...

Bet it doesn't even look like my syringe.

Soccer Mom
03-04-2007, 06:57 PM
Yeeeeeeeee Haaaaaaaaaaaw! Welcome, baby Sarina!

Almost 8 1/2? Sounds like a great size for a midfielder. Get that tot some cleats. And start her out with a No. 3 ball.

TsukiRyoko
03-04-2007, 07:02 PM
She's kidding, Anthony. Really. I mean it. Honest...

Bet it doesn't even look like my syringe.
While it doesn't resemble your syringe that much, she does have surprisingly bright red eyes and a little bit of foam coming from the side of her mouth. She bit one of the nurses (er, gummed them, I guess) and now the nurse is rabid, or at least, that's what the police scanner said. I dunno Haggis....

JoeEkaitis
03-04-2007, 07:24 PM
Huzzahs, congratulations and all that. :)

brianm
03-04-2007, 07:25 PM
Congrats, Jenna! Wonderful news.

May your wee daughter be blessed with health, beauty, love, happiness and joy always.

Jean Marie
03-04-2007, 07:25 PM
Welcome to the world, Sarina :snoopy: God bless you, little one :)

Congrats to you, Jenna and Anthony :Hug2:

alleycat
03-04-2007, 07:27 PM
Gee, how many Godfathers and Godmothers will this kid have?

aruna
03-04-2007, 07:28 PM
Check again, Haggis. Mac said something about the baby being born with a syringe clenched between her gums.

It wasn't a syringe, it was a pen! She immediately began writing her memoirs.

stormie
03-04-2007, 07:36 PM
YESSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!! Congrats Jenna and Anthony on the birth of your baby girl Sarina!

Welcome to the world, baby girl Sarina!

Maryn
03-04-2007, 07:37 PM
Wonderful. Welcome to the world, little one. Give your parents a break when you can, okay?

Maryn, remembering it all

TsukiRyoko
03-04-2007, 07:58 PM
Baby's here :hooray: :D Baby baby baby baby

PattiTheWicked
03-04-2007, 08:00 PM
Welcome to the world, little Sarina. May you achieve all of your hopes and dreams.

ChaosTitan
03-04-2007, 08:11 PM
:snoopy: :snoopy: :snoopy:

Happy Belated Birthday, Sarina!!!!!!

And hugs for Mom and Dad!

Carrie in PA
03-04-2007, 08:13 PM
CONGRAULATIONS JENNA!!!!!!!!!!!! (And Anthony) I'm so glad everyone is healthy and happy. HOORAY!!!!!!!!!

dclary
03-04-2007, 08:16 PM
Isn't this freakin' baby here yet? Sheesh.

P.H.Delarran
03-04-2007, 08:18 PM
Wonderful news-and a good sized baby.
Can't wait for pictures.
Congratulations to Jenna and Anthony!

Serena Casey
03-04-2007, 08:32 PM
Yay! Congratulations to the new mom and dad and welcome, Sarina!
http://www.addis-welt.de/smilie/smilie/diverse/440.gif

badducky
03-04-2007, 08:38 PM
19 pages of congratulations and happiness. Let's go for 19 more.

CONGRATULATIONS!

Susan Gable
03-04-2007, 08:53 PM
Mega congrats, Jenna & Anthony! Welcome, little Serina! As you can see, we've thrown a big party in honor of your arrival.

:partyguy: :PartySmil

Susan G.

swvaughn
03-04-2007, 08:57 PM
Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony, brand new mommy and daddy! And welcome to the world, Sarina!

Greenwolf103
03-04-2007, 09:25 PM
Yay!!! Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony! Welcome to the world, Sarina! :welcome: I am soo happy for all three of you!! :snoopy:

Foinah
03-04-2007, 09:38 PM
EXCELLENT!!!!
JENNA, BRIGHT BLESSINGS ON YOUR FAMILY!!! :welcome: :hooray: :snoopy: :partyguy:

A new baby is such a joyous occasion...happy squirmy red faces and yummy baby smells. Take lots of pictures to remember these days - sleep deprivation makes everything pass by in a blur ;)

Mae
03-04-2007, 09:45 PM
Jenna called, she's fine, she had a fine, healthy perfect baby girl at approximately 3:30 pm eastern time, March 2nd. The baby was 8 pounds, 5 ounces, and 22 inches long. She's godzilla. But with hair.

Jenna and Baby are happy, healthy and will be going home tomorrow!

Congrats the the new parents - a new world is in store for them!

Sean D. Schaffer
03-04-2007, 09:46 PM
The first thing I noticed when I came in this morning was a big banner across the top of the AW Main Forum Page. It kind of startled me.

Then I read the news.

Congratulations, Jenna. Welcome to the world, Baby Serina. I wish you and your family the very best.

:hooray:

And much happiness to you.

:)

Mom'sWrite
03-04-2007, 10:06 PM
Congratulations Jenna and Anthony. Your world is about to get rocked in ways you can't even imagine. Strap in for one crazy ride. You're gonna love it.

Babies are so cool.

Happy days and blissful nights to you all.

Carol

Ken Schneider
03-04-2007, 10:37 PM
Jenna called, she's fine, she had a fine, healthy perfect baby girl at approximately 3:30 pm eastern time, March 2nd.

Great job Jenna. Congrats to you and Anthony.

No bigger thrill.

Somebody go find out how many kids were born 03-02-07.

clintl
03-04-2007, 10:49 PM
Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony! And best wishes for a wonderful life to Sarina!

Little Red Barn
03-04-2007, 10:57 PM
Blessings to Jenna and family! Happy Birthday Sarina. :)

limitedtimeauthor
03-04-2007, 11:03 PM
Congratulations Jenna! :)

ltd.

Just Me
03-04-2007, 11:29 PM
Aww!!! :LilLove: Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony! And welcome to the world from me, too, Sarina!

Scribhneoir
03-04-2007, 11:43 PM
Welcome, little Sarina!:Sun: Congratulations to the proud mama and papa, Jenna and Anthony! :e2cloud9:

AmyDoodle
03-05-2007, 02:04 AM
WELCOME SARINA! CONGRATULATIONS JENNA & ANTHONY!!! A baby. Oh I dearly love babies!
:hooray:

writerterri
03-05-2007, 02:34 AM
Welcome Serina! http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/11/11_6_202.gif (http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001_ZSYYYYYYYYUS)



Kiss those little feet for me! http://smileys.smileycentral.com/cat/15/15_5_16.gif (http://www.smileycentral.com/?partner=ZSzeb001_ZSYYYYYYYYUS)


Congratulations Jenna and Anthony!





http://www.smileycentral.com/sig.jsp?pc=ZSzeb113&pp=ZSYYYYYYYYUS (http://smiley.smileycentral.com/download/index.jhtml?partner=ZSzeb113_ZSYYYYYYYYUS&utm_id=7921)

sassandgroove
03-05-2007, 03:34 AM
I am glad Jenna and Baby, and Anthony, are good. :)

Pagey's_Girl
03-05-2007, 04:19 AM
Congratulations!

MidnightMuse
03-05-2007, 05:10 AM
Awwww, it's a BABY!!! Welcome to the world, little one :)

oarsman
03-05-2007, 05:42 AM
Welcome, Baby Sarina! http://www.smileyarena.com/emoticons/Main/Baby/baby10.gif

Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony!

KODB
03-05-2007, 06:07 AM
Most excellent work, both of you! Oh, and you, too, Anthony...

Congratulations.

AnneMarble
03-05-2007, 06:38 AM
Wooooot!!! Congratulations all around!

:banana: :e2woo:

Arisa81
03-05-2007, 06:44 AM
Congrats Jenna and Anthony.
Welcome, Sarina.
Blessings to you all.
:Hug2:

Mom'sWrite
03-05-2007, 07:59 AM
I'm so greedy.

I want to see baby pictures.

My-Immortal
03-05-2007, 08:54 AM
Congrats....I'm being quiet because the baby might be sleeping...and if the baby is sleeping so too should mommy and daddy. Shhhhhhh......

:)

trumancoyote
03-05-2007, 09:54 AM
I shall expect to be officially made her Godfather, Jenna, as she was born on my birthday.

And Congratulations :)

madderblue
03-05-2007, 10:38 AM
Congratulations! Now the real fun begins! The next few months will be absolutely surreal, in a very good way.


(...and when did Truman get back? Missed you.)

Peggy
03-05-2007, 12:12 PM
Congrats Jenna and Anthony and welcome Sarina!
:snoopy:

startwearingpurple
03-05-2007, 01:57 PM
Congrats welcome to lil baby Sarina!! hope the mommys well *hugs* swp xxx

J. Weiland
03-05-2007, 03:03 PM
Congratulations, Jenna and Anthony. I'm happy for you.

Bmwhtly
03-05-2007, 03:14 PM
I finally found the post (http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/showpost.php?p=1168549&postcount=394) with the goods news.

Congrats to Jenna and Anthony. And well done Sarina for finding your way out.

c2ckim
03-05-2007, 03:15 PM
Congradulation Jenna, Anthony and welcome to the world baby Sarina:D
Sorry I just got on my computer after more than a month. I've been checking it off and on during the month but I've also been dealing with a double blow. My Dad passed away Jan 30 and my Mom passed away Feb 9th of this year so I've been traveling to Texas more in a month than I ever wanted to.
But I was so happy to hear that Jenna had her baby!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!and all the love you guys have shared with them during the whole delivery has been outstanding.
Can't wait for pictures of the darling girl and Mom and Dad of course.

jen.nifer
03-06-2007, 05:03 AM
Congratulations Jenna and Anthony! Wonderful news!

kikazaru
03-06-2007, 05:51 AM
Wonderful news, so glad to hear that she's made her way into this world and that everyone is doing fine. Congratulations!

Akuma
03-06-2007, 06:57 AM
Congratulations, Jenna.

You may not know it, but us lurkers appreciate you and your efforts.

Hope everything continues going great for you.

Adagio
03-06-2007, 07:32 AM
I shall expect to be officially made her Godfather, Jenna, as she was born on my birthday.

And Congratulations :)

Hey, trumancoyote, Happy Birthday to you!:D :partyguy:

Congratulations to you Jenna and your family. Welcome to you, sweet baby :welcome::Sun:

MacAllister
03-06-2007, 07:52 AM
http://i8.photobucket.com/albums/a11/MacAlStone/SarinaPookieface.jpg
Baby Sarina!

Southern_girl29
03-06-2007, 08:29 AM
What a chubby cute little baby. I just want to squeeze her.

Mandy-Jane
03-06-2007, 09:06 AM
She looks like she's sick and tired of having her photo taken so much.

"Just put that camera away and let me sleep in peace!"

limitedtimeauthor
03-06-2007, 09:14 AM
What a sweetie!

She looks like Jenna! :) Thanks for the picture.

ltd.

Birol
03-06-2007, 09:18 AM
Oh. BIG Baby.

aruna
03-06-2007, 10:01 AM
Yes! She's quite a bundle!