social worker killed, baby kidnapped.

[mdin]

The day before I start my new job out on my own, after many weeks of training, this (http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/10/17/amber.alert.ap/index.html) happens.

HENDERSON, Kentucky (AP) -- A social worker who had taken a 10-month-old boy to his mother's house for a visit was found beaten and stabbed to death, and the baby was apparently abducted, authorities said.
Police found the body of Boni Frederick, 67, at the house on Monday after she failed to return to work. Her car was missing.
Police searched on Tuesday for the missing boy, who was believed to be with his mother, Renee Terrell, 33, and her boyfriend Christopher Wayne Luttrell, 23.


This is exactly what I do now. Take children out to their parents for supervised visitation. My wife is having a complete cow.

[dclary]

Why anyone who actually liked children would ever work for Social Services for more than a year, I have no idea. Cherish your idealism while you still have it. It'll fade fast. When you come to your senses, get the hell out.

[P.H.Delarran]

Sad story.
But surely this is not a common occurance? I would guess that merely driving to the job is equally or more dangerous.
Good luck with your new job.

[icerose]

Why anyone who actually liked children would ever work for Social Services for more than a year, I have no idea. Cherish your idealism while you still have it. It'll fade fast. When you come to your senses, get the hell out.

I don't understand this position dclary. The children who are taken out of homes in these parts desperately need help and their parents are doing something seriously wrong to them to have them taken away. It is unfortunate they wait so long for some of these children because by the time they do the children are so damaged that have a slim chance at ever having any kind of a life.

[dclary]

Spend some time in the system, Ice.

Social Services, as a bureaucracy, exists by expanding its budget, not by shrinking it. As a result, it is in their best interests to increase the number of children it is responsible for, regardless of child/family needs.

That, however, is just a sad corollary.

The heart of the matter is this: for every family you find that Child Protective Services actually HELPED, you will find two or three where families were shattered and children destroyed. There are no long-term social workers who are not cold, calloused, bitter people who hate the families they have to work with. Anyone who truly loves children and wants to see them helped end up leaving the governmental agency to find places where their love and work can actually make a difference to the positive.

Don't ask me, though. Go to a family services office some time. Spend some time in the system. You'll quickly learn that this is no place for a child, regardless of his home situation.

[Becky Writes]

I agree that the system needs a massive overhaul, but I don't agree that kids are better off in abusive homes rather than in a stable foster home.

In fact, I think the problem is not taking the kids away from their biological family, but rather returning them there too soon. We haer over and over that the system makes decisions based on the best interest of the child, but I don't think that's true. I think the best interest of bilogical parents comes first many, many times.

As for the story, as a foster parent, I have a fear the crazy bio parents will spaz out on us. So far, we've been really lucky and have had good relationships with the bilogoical parents of our foster children -- except for the two we have now. Their bilogical parents scare me.

[icerose]

Spend some time in the system, Ice.

Social Services, as a bureaucracy, exists by expanding its budget, not by shrinking it. As a result, it is in their best interests to increase the number of children it is responsible for, regardless of child/family needs.



See, I live in a small community and their resources are spread very thin. Because you have to have enough foster homes. So they wait until it is the absolute worse possible case before taking the kids.

Real Life Example.

There is a married woman around town who has three kids. When her youngest was a year old child services visited their home.

There was human fecal material spread across the walls and carpets, the children were caked in dirt, fecal material and old food. Old food was rotting in the middle of the room, there was an actual mushroom growing from a pile of food.

The mother did nothing but read day in and day out. She did not feed the kids, she did not bath the kids. Her husband would be gone for long bouts for work, so when he was home the house was clean and the kids kept up, when he was gone which was far too often, they were in the above situation. The children ate the cat poop for food and had to be dewormed. The furniture and carpet was so bad that it had to be burned on the front lawn. The middle child, a boy, had been molested by the mother, repeatedly.

Both parents had to be sent to a one year parental course in which they were under close supervision and had to be taught how to be parents. Both of them are still on probation. All of the kids have 0 social graces. They will walk into your house, get into your fridge and steal from you. The oldest is now 7 years old.

Prior to that none of the kids have ever seen a doctor, had any immunizations, or had any kind of real care.

And guess what, the parents still have custody of them.

I can understand your point, I would not wish for it, but not all communities are in it for the money and breaking up family. In fact this community is far too lenient due to under funding.

[astonwest]

I think this is a story my wife should see, considering she thinks foster care is what we ought to be doing...yikes.

[mdin]

I think this is a story my wife should see, considering she thinks foster care is what we ought to be doing...yikes.

Be careful. First she'll want to be a foster mom. Then she'll want to start adopting everyone. Next thing you know you'll be bald from stress and broke.

[Becky Writes]

Yes, yes...it's an addiction.

I can never wait to get the next one. I currently have 4 kids (3 are waiting to be adopted from foster care) and I am begging DSS for another one.

I love being a foster parent.

[SC Harrison]

The heart of the matter is this: for every family you find that Child Protective Services actually HELPED, you will find two or three where families were shattered and children destroyed. There are no long-term social workers who are not cold, calloused, bitter people who hate the families they have to work with.

Deek, could you expand on what brought you to these conclusions? Maybe a link to a study or something? 'Cause without something more, you're tempting me to violate the "respect your fellow writer" thingie, and I really don't want to do that.

Every single day in this country, children are saved by these folks. If you've seen some cases where the parents had their children removed prematurely, and should have been given "one more chance" to prove their not unworthy, make sure you're looking at it from the child's perspective and not the parent's.

Are there some (many?) social workers who are jaded and ineffective? Of course. Are parents these days dependable enough to make Child Protective Services obsolete? Oh, Hell no.

[mdin]

Here's (http://www.kentucky.com/mld/kentucky/news/state/15793883.htm) the latest. It turns out the mom had just found out a day or two before that the child was going to be severed (put up for adoption) which meant she was never going to see the baby again. I don't know how it works there, but here, despite what people seem to think, the courts bend over backwards to keep that from happening. You have to be pretty messed up to lose your kid forever.

[dclary]

Deek, could you expand on what brought you to these conclusions? Maybe a link to a study or something? 'Cause without something more, you're tempting me to violate the "respect your fellow writer" thingie, and I really don't want to do that.

Every single day in this country, children are saved by these folks. If you've seen some cases where the parents had their children removed prematurely, and should have been given "one more chance" to prove their not unworthy, make sure you're looking at it from the child's perspective and not the parent's.

Are there some (many?) social workers who are jaded and ineffective? Of course. Are parents these days dependable enough to make Child Protective Services obsolete? Oh, Hell no.

I can only speak from personal experience, and the experiences of *every* family I've ever known who've gone through social services Harrison. And unfortunately I'm not of a mind to go into the details this morning. Ask me another day, and I'll gladly oblige.

[SC Harrison]

I can only speak from personal experience, and the experiences of *every* family I've ever known who've gone through social services Harrison. And unfortunately I'm not of a mind to go into the details this morning. Ask me another day, and I'll gladly oblige.

That's good enough for me (for now :)).

The thing is...many of the cases where children were removed from their parents before neglect or abuse could permanently damage the child are real hard to categorize as a "success". In this arena, it's much easier to spot the failures...

[astonwest]

Be careful. First she'll want to be a foster mom. Then she'll want to start adopting everyone. Next thing you know you'll be bald from stress and broke.Trust me, I've already seen it in my nightmares...

I fear the day she has to give one back to the birth parents...that's going to get ugly.

And of course, the first child in our custody that goes up for adoption, I already figure she's going to immediately think that a possibility...

[Kate Thornton]

We fostered 6 children over the years - they have all turned out beautifully and were all eventually reunited with their biological parents. I'm glad that part of my life has passed, but it was a fun ride!

Yes money was tight - like in all families with kids! - but the good that was done to *everyone* involved is immeasurable. (Just saw one of our sweeties last night - at her place of business. She & her husband & child are planning a short vacation this weekend)