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View Full Version : Existing super powers


Nangleator
07-22-2006, 02:30 AM
Sure, it's fun to come up with imaginary, new super powers, but what super powers do you have already?

I have a couple.

First, I make traffic lights turn yellow merely by approaching them in a car. It doesn't work 100% of the time, but I've logged tremendous statistical anomalies.

Tremendous statistical anomalies!!

Also, I think of a line of dialog from a television show, and within a day or two, my channel surfing will reveal that exact moment, right before my eyes!

Must... Erg!... use these powers... only for... uh!... good!

dclary
07-22-2006, 02:41 AM
Uncanny Wheel of Fortune premontions, instant recall of movie and tv quotes to fit any occasion. Mutant Ability to ingest almost any substance.

MidnightMuse
07-22-2006, 02:42 AM
I can hold a couch in place for hours.

If it's in front of a TV and there's food within reach, many many hours.

robeiae
07-22-2006, 02:45 AM
I'm not a 'super power' kind of guy. I rely on super gadgets, like my eight-track tape player, beta-max recorder, and NEC 286SX laptop. Oh, and my sliderule.

dahmnait
07-22-2006, 02:53 AM
First, I make traffic lights turn yellow merely by approaching them in a car. It doesn't work 100% of the time, but I've logged tremendous statistical anomalies.You must be the nemesis for my mom. She makes them all turn green. What would happen if the two of you approached a stop light at the same time?

Nangleator
07-22-2006, 02:56 AM
Batman/Inspector Gadget-style "super powers" are acceptable. My own personal Nanglemobile, the green 2000 VW New Beetle, displays an uncanny knack for attracting avian feces, however I haven't quite worked out how to use this facility to foil evil-doers.

aadams73
07-22-2006, 02:58 AM
I can make a box of those Little Debbie cakes disappear in an instant!

I can make surrounding traffic disobey all roadrules!

Umm..other than that I pretty much suck.

Gehanna
07-22-2006, 03:23 AM
I can spot arachnids within so many feet of my body before anyone else can.

I can cause paralysis but only on myself and only during sleep.

I can make my husband reach out and grab my arse simply by bending over. -- This superpower drives me insane.

I can tell people something and make them go, "huh?"

alleycat
07-22-2006, 03:28 AM
I can play songs over and over in my head without an MP3 player . . . especially songs I didn't like to begin with.

Annabella
07-22-2006, 03:39 AM
I can tell people something and make them go, "huh?"

Oh Oh I have that power, too!

I can learn a new word and then see it in everything I read!

I can make someone break up with me because I'm "too quiet".

whistlelock
07-22-2006, 04:24 AM
my most useful superpower is my ability to create an empty parking spaces near the front of a store.

My least useful power is my ability to misspell any word at any given moment, despite having previously spelled correctly a few sentences prior.

SC Harrison
07-22-2006, 04:26 AM
I have an uncanny ability to sense when women are not attracted to me. Unfortunately, this is offset by my inability to detect when they are.

tiny
07-22-2006, 04:37 AM
I have the ability to say something out loud that I shouldn't the minute the place falls quiet.

jbal
07-22-2006, 04:37 AM
I can tape all of your buns together

tiny
07-22-2006, 04:38 AM
Yes, but can you put on lip gloss with your boobs... wait, no boobs. Guess not then.

jbal
07-22-2006, 04:40 AM
Well, I wouldn't tape your buns together anyway because you could probably beat me up. So I will make an elephant lamp

alleycat
07-22-2006, 04:42 AM
I can predict what women will say in a bar.

I go, "How's it going, beautiful?"

And they reply, "Get lost, jerk". And I KNEW they were going to say that! Uncanny, huh?

TsukiRyoko
07-22-2006, 04:47 AM
I have the power to make everything I order off the television mysteriously break down in UNDER a weeks time. Maybe I should start ordering weapons of mass destruction?

kristie911
07-22-2006, 04:49 AM
I have the ability to make anyone shut up with a single look.

TsukiRyoko
07-22-2006, 04:59 AM
a good power indeed! i wish i could do that...

TrainofThought
07-22-2006, 05:20 AM
I have the power to make people step back with a look.

The powers to talk freely with guy friends, then in an instant, become shy and meek when a guy of interest arrives.

I also can predict when the Chicago Cubs will lose. HA, HA, HA…..

DamaNegra
07-22-2006, 05:31 AM
I have the power to mess up everything I cook, including Tang (those little envelopes with powder you add to water to flavor it). Yes, I have messed up Tang.

Oh, and I have the power to make any electrical appliance of my possesion fail (but not as bad as my cousin, who could make a computer lose its internet connection by simply touching it)


On a more serious note, I have the power to know what other people are thinking without even looking at them.

Jean Marie
07-22-2006, 05:37 AM
Dama............................................?

Akuma
07-22-2006, 05:44 AM
I have the power to push someone away without touching them. Seriously, I'll even teach you.

1. Lick your palm (make sure they see you do it)
2. Extend palm towards person
3. Profit

allion
07-22-2006, 06:00 AM
My ability is that when I park in an empty parking lot, someone will park beside, in front of, or behind me in spite of all the empty spots available. And they will be driving a huge pickup/SUV/minivan that I cannot see around or through. I drive a Corolla.

I also can break watches simply by wearing them.

I burn toast, soup, popcorn, and french fries when attempting to cook.

I speak cat.

Karen

kristie911
07-22-2006, 06:57 AM
I also can predict when the Chicago Cubs will lose. HA, HA, HA…..

I can make the Chicago Cubs lose just by watching the game on WGN. I can also make them lose simply by not watching them.

Oh, that's right...they always lose. <sigh> And I still love 'em.

oneovu
07-22-2006, 07:54 AM
I can put out streetlamps with my mind. I don't quite have control of this power, though, so I never know when it's going to happen. My friend, Paula, she's seen me do it many times. She'd tell you, herself, but she doesn't like boards. Oh and she just moved to Canada. And, her computer's broken. For a long time.

deacon
07-22-2006, 08:07 AM
i have the ability to translate what a person says into what he means. when bush said he was looking for Weapons of Mass Destruction, i knew he really meant Wells of Mass Production

louisgodwin
07-22-2006, 10:51 AM
I have an uncanny ability to sense when women are not attracted to me. Unfortunately, this is offset by my inability to detect when they are.

You must be my long lost twin brother.

alleycat
07-22-2006, 03:54 PM
I have the power to mess up everything I cook, including Tang (those little envelopes with powder you add to water to flavor it). Yes, I have messed up Tang.
:e2thud:

PattiTheWicked
07-22-2006, 06:28 PM
I have the ability to spend two hours preparing a meal, only to have the other four residents of my home annouce, "We're not really hungry."

I can stop other people's children from misbehaving with a simple, "No way, pal."

I am apparently capable of invisibility, because no one seems to notice me talking to them.

In an interesting paradox, I evidently have a locator device implanted somewhere in my body, because no matter where I hide, people always come find me to tell me we're out of chocolate milk.

DamaNegra
07-22-2006, 07:59 PM
Oh, oh, I am also capable of invisibility!! No one notices me until I speak directly to them, thus scaring them out of their wits because they thought they're alone :D

And yes, the Tang thing is real. Sadly :( Which is why I'm not allowed near the kitchen anymore.

SpookyWriter
07-22-2006, 08:01 PM
Oh, oh, I am also capable of invisibility!! No one notices me until I speak directly to them, thus scaring them out of their wits because they thought they're alone :D

And yes, the Tang thing is real. Sadly :( Which is why I'm not allowed near the kitchen anymore.:roll:

Haggis
07-22-2006, 08:28 PM
I am able to ingest vast quantities of beer, yet not urinate in my pants.

SpookyWriter
07-22-2006, 08:29 PM
I am able to ingest vast quantities of beer, yet not urinate in my pants.That all depends, right?

Haggis
07-22-2006, 08:39 PM
That all depends, right?

Two words: "Texas catheter."