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triceretops
10-31-2005, 10:04 AM
I'm trying to be brave like Joe and throw an idea out here for perusal. I'm terrified to be in this thread (and genre), since I'm a hard-science fiction writer--but fantasy settings are right up my alley. I've posted below my thoughts on a story that's been banging around in my head. Has anything like this been done before, and what age group and length would something like this be? If the concept sucks, I can take the spanking. Just need some experienced writers/readers of children or young adult material to give it the critical eye. Thanks for any thoughts.






RAINBOW WARRIORS




Five kids go to a park where they intend to set off model rockets just after it’s rained, owed to the sky being so clear. A giant rainbow still hangs in the sky. They see an old, disheveled man stumbling down a grassy knoll (coming from the direction of the rainbow’s end), who has an idiot grin on his face. He walks past them saying, “I’m finally home, oh, praise be! It is Chesterfield!” He drops something in the grass. The kids pick up a pair of glasses that have color pinwheels in them, and when the wearer dons them they spin magically, which allows him/her to see the rainbows end. Only these rainbows are very real and solid structures, because the magic glasses show this.

They decide to climb this rainbow, and run into Cumulous Nimbus Columbus who yells at them for being up on the rainbow. (Columbus is the guardian of all the rainbows and serves as a mentor throughout the kid’s journey). With their first encounter with him they go to punch his nose and he disappears in a wisp—the kids lose their balance and go sliding down the rainbow into The Land Of Plenty (the first of five magical lands that they will visit). Suddenly the rainbow disappears, as they always do in the mist. So the kids are stuck in this land until it rains again, or they use their own initiative to get out. They also get a pot o’ gold (which is actually a gold-cast pot) at the end of each rainbow that they can barter off to get out of trouble from each land. (Or buy an important clue?)

Example: Land of Plenty=people counting cabbage, kids swimming in mullah, and adults rolling in doe. Penny Nichols is their guide to meet Bill Cash (the mayor), and explain to him why the children’s names do not reflect any value, thus these children are worthless—they befriend two ponies named silver and dollar who answer difficult questions, but it’s always money-related, and they find pieces of eight (the number is broken). The idea is to escape this fantasyland via climbing another rainbow, or solving some type of puzzle. When they finally get out then it’s on to the next land with similar problems and puzzles to follow, but they always learn one important theme lesson in each land. For example The Land Of Plenty teaches them about thrift and saving money. Slobstokia will teach them about hygiene and nutrition. I’ll need three more lands.
When they do finally visit all five lands, (by now they’re really homesick) they take the right rainbow (after having to wait for rain again) out of this magical land, and find out that they have arrived home in their beloved Chesterfield and everyone else is much younger or older (Haven’t decided yet) but there will definitely be a time warp or suspension.
This will be written in the vintage Roal Dahl tradition (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory). I don’t know what age group this would be for but I’m guessing from 9—13 or something like that. I envision the kids being around eight to twelve years old. Maybe a little older for model rockets, eh? Or have them kite flying because of the recent wind gusts? Whatever, LOL!

Triceratops

Jenny
10-31-2005, 10:59 AM
I've no useful advice, but I like the idea. Question: Is five too many protagonists for one book? Would three kids work better? I know the famous five existed once, but I'm still asking.

triceretops
10-31-2005, 11:12 AM
Thanks, Jenny. You might have a point there--five might be too much to draw out each individual character. I was only thinking of five kids, and five lands because each theme is covered in each land, and that theme/lesson might apply to each individual. Perhaps one of the kids is a spendthrift and learns his/her lesson in the first land--Land of Plenty. But three sounds good too--less complicated. I can imagine that it would depend on the age group it's written for. Personally, I'd like to get away with using young teens, as was done in the movie Goonies, or some such.

Tri

writerterri
11-01-2005, 06:45 AM
Hi Tri, Kids are a sticky audience. Ha Ha. I would cut it down to three lands because you would have to out do yourself in every land in order to keep them turning pages. If it's a chapter book you will have to bring the ages up to about ten or eleven through fifteen. You would have to make the toppics of interest to that age group. Not very many kids are into thrift, saving money, nutrition or hygiene so your presentation would have to be outstanding or they would get bored. I like the consept though. Also,rainbows are girly and worriors are boyish, you might want to throw girls into the mix and make it interesting. Perhaps they could get stuck in a history lesson of the funny sorts or stuck in a nutritional video game and make it funny. Hope this helped.


writerterri

September skies
11-01-2005, 08:07 AM
Interesting. And very colorful. I like it. But when you do write it, please don't make the writing get smaller and smaller...I had a hard time reading towards the end. :)