I'm SUCH a COW! :D

So, I am taking this one night a week class for the next ten weeks to get an HR certification. K? And I come in a bit late but they are just so doggone happy to see me that the instructors just grin and laugh because they knew something I didn't. I had a 20 minute drive to get there that took me 40 minutes because of rush hour traffic going from Salt Lake County to Utah County. I didn't know it would be THAT bad. And then I drove all around this campus that I had no idea was that huge and had to stop this poor startled looking young lady to ask for directions.

So anyway, they are smiling and patting me on the back and just so nice and I take the closest seat to the door available and this....


sorry, I'm having to pause long enough to stop laughing....

this ...stick of a chick, lets out this huge sigh as I take the seat next to her. Okay, so normally I'd do everything in my power to get her to like me but do I do my usual schtick? NOPE.

So like this chick looks like she just walked out of a fortune five hundred office, perfect attire, perfect hair, perfect handbag all tied up with the meanest, snottiest attitude. I looked around the classroom and a couple other women were grinning at me like, I dunno...ha ha! sucks to be you, you are stuck with her!

So this is a four hour class all about the LAWS of HR and what not and we have this great instructor who is funny as hell and every time we all laughed at his jokes she wrinkled up her nose and sighed.

I mean, this chick was so toxic, I wanted to lean over and say, honey, I think you must have sat on a carrot cos your face shouldn't be contorting that way. Let's just say, sometimes people take themselves entirely too serious.

So I started to notice that every time I contributed to the discussion she had to try and one up me. (AHAHAHAHAHAA, if you knew me, you'd know I'm so not competitive but sometimes...certain personalities, I rise to the occasion just to annoy them.) And at one point, I was talking about the need for caution when setting HR precedences because they can come back on you. Well she wanted to argue that I was wrong about the procedure for reduced capacity work for injured employees, (tsk she should have known better, I'm the ex construction owner) and the teacher actually comes and sits on the desk in front of us and the whole class stares as her and I debate it with the instructor mediating. OH MY GOSH. Her face was actually red when I won the final point.

After that she'd comment after me with, "well in a big company" so I finally said (stops to laugh) "so tell me, what do you mean by a "big company". To which the ENTIRE back row of the classroom busted out laughing before they could stop themselves. It was hilarious...she got all flustered when I asked that simple question. I spent the rest of the time purposely saying little bits here and there just so I could hear her little sigh and then....

I started sighing too. Every time she did. I'm such a cow. She left with her head down and didn't speak to anyone when she left.

Sorry I just had to share. I don't remember having that much fun in a long time.

Okay so this is where ya'll are meant to tell your "I'm a cow story" so I don't feel like a really bad one.

Yay! overtired. I'm not the only one. I don't know what this chick said tonight before I got there as I was almost a half hour late but she must have annoyed a lot of people. They wouldn't even listen to her. LOL

And the sad thing is, had she not been such a pain in the butt, her input wasn't all that bad but she came off as a know it all because she works for a large HR company in downtown that gets their clients to turn all their HR departments to them. I've seen their ad online and I really don't like what they do. They go in and replace good valued staff that know the actual business with their clerks. It just isn't the same as having your own HR people who are integrated into the whole team.

but that's just me. I just had to crow a bit about it because I usually back away from those kind of situations and want everyone to like me.

I think this is progress.

dpaterso said:

'Twould be interesting to see how she reacted if you approached her before next class and said you enjoyed hearing her viewpoints, which made for a richer discussion the whole class could appreciate.

If she bursts into tears and cries, "No one's ever been kind to me before!" you know you've gained battlefield superiority.

-Derek

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LOL. Awesome idea! It was hard for me not to snicker every time she sighed. I just feel bad for her now. Cos imagine what it must be like to be her. YIKES

aadams, I usually take the "higher road" approach to people that's why I laughed so hard at myself and her. It was absolutely out of character for me to just ride her ass. I don't regret it and I don't feel sorry for her.
good times I tell you.

aadams73 said:

You usually do take the high road, which is why this surprises me. Her only initial crime was her affluent appearance and an offstandish attitude, the latter of which is often adopted to cover overwhelming shyness. Maybe she was a snotty person with a superiority complex, but maybe she had some other social or personal problem.

Not only did you deride her, but you also engaged the rest of the class as your accomplices. And you're taking delight in making another woman slink away with her head down. Would you still take the same pleasure had the rest of the class not been so amused by your efforts?

I have to wonder, did she remind you of someone from your past who wronged you, but that you felt powerless to confront at the time? It's not uncommon for people to adopt a surrogate so they can act out a mild revenge fantasy of sorts, punishing the new person for the crimes of the old.

This fascinates me because--as you said--this IS out of character for you.

(Oooooh, 6,666 posts!)

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The only derision I've shown is here.

And yes, I did enjoy seeing her reap the consequences of her actions. Most people tolerate that sort of behaviour when really it serves no purpose but to make the offender feel good about themselves. She didn't just respond to me this way but every single person who had something to say.

I didn't not engage anyone in it...it was their reaction to my contribution. They also laughed about things in the class that weren't all about her. I reckon what they couldn't contain one more moment was laughing when I finally spoke up and asked her a pointed question about her passive aggressive attempt at silencing me because she wanted to be the only person in the class to know anything.

No, it wasn't tied to any past incidence. I wasn't willing to sit there and put up with it.

LOL, aadams, does it do something for you to play psychoanylist here? Does this remind you of something from your past? Did someone put you in your place for acting out this way? Does it really fascinate you are or are you taken aback with my acting out of character? Do you have preconceived ideas of who I am and how I should act?

Please, let's not make more out of this than it was. A moment in which I actually took a stand.

lucidzfl said:

I realize I'm probably on ignore here, but I'll reply anyway.

Is there any chance that little ms "i'm prettier than you, i'm younger than you, i-have-a-good job, I was able to look perfect AND show up on time" was sighing at you because you showed up half an hour late to a class/meeting and proceeded to act like a know-it-all and contradict everything she said?

If someone comes into a meeting/class and started acting like a jack ass I'd be annoyed too. Especially if the class was something in which showing up late is an offense that you yourself, as an HR person might have to demerit them for?

If, as an HR person, a boss told you he wanted to officially write an employee up for being tardy, would you reply, "Hey lets ask if they got stuck in traffic, or if they got lost?"

Doubtful.

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Huh. Okay this is fun.

She wasn't prettier than me, I don't know if she's younger, it was the first night of class and they had just finished passing out materials and one of the instructors greeted me at the door and no one was upset at my arrival evidently several were late. They hadn't even gotten to the introduction of students and instructors yet. She doesn't have a better job than I do. By the end of class she told us the name of her company.

You see, there are different types of HR jobs. She is an HR assistant in a very big firm that goes out and convinces business owners to outsource their HR tasks to them. Which means any HR professional who has a job in those companies, now gets laid off in this current economic climate. I think that's morally bankrupt. The rest of the class was made up of department assistants or directors for specific companies who don't use her company's type of services.

As for being late, I live in a separate county, 20 miles away, I left early, 40 minutes early in fact and ran into heavy road construction and equipment. I had no idea it was going on. I go that direction maybe once a year.

And you should know that nothing is EVER black and white. But thanks for playing. Why on earth would you think I actually put you on ignore? Don't you have a sense of humour?

lucidzfl said:

Is there any chance that little ms "i'm prettier than you, i'm younger than you, i-have-a-good job, I was able to look perfect AND show up on time" was sighing at you because you showed up half an hour late to a class/meeting and proceeded to act like a know-it-all and contradict everything she said?

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OH wow, I totally forgot to mention, I didn't say a single thing about her looks, her age. Though I did mention she had that fortune 500 look about her. But that's cultural from where I live. And, I didn't start the contradicting her comments but was countering her contradicting comments.

Wow, did you just make some assumption about me. LOL. What does this say about you? hmmm?

overtired said:

Okay, I think we're coming down on Cassi a bit hard here.

Some people are just dicks, and while most of us don't bait people on purpose most of the time, ALL of us have met people who have made us want to do that at some point.

Sometimes people do need to be knocked down a peg or two. Yes, she may feel bad, but hopefully it will improve her attitude in future. I've been knocked down when I've got too big for my boots, as well I should have, and I see no reason in letting other people get away with an attitude if it deserves correction.

I don't think Cassi would have said anything if she didn't feel it was truly deserved, so I'n with her.

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Thanks for giving me the benefit of the doubt. I think I was more crowing about the fact that I stood up to her. That and yes, I was totally venting about the attitude she gave everyone because I see it everyday.

And I can relate to what you said here because long ago I was actually shown my arse on more than one occasion for having a bad attitude. It happens to all of us. or it should perhaps.

lucidzfl said:

It says that as long as you're willing to keep an open mind and accept different viewpoints I can not be an ass and offer different insights than people who blindly say "you go girl". That's not always a bad thing btw. I call it like I see it and if you're cool with it, we can make good pal situations.

it also says you were full of shit when you said I was on ignore

ETA: I'm in a situation right now where it feels like EVERY other employee than me is a slack ass mofo. I am putting in my time while others show up at 11 am, or take 2 hour lunches, or leave at three, or some combination of the three!

I get that at my level of employment some of this is acceptable to a point, but there are a lot of abusers, so excuse me if I jump to conclusions.

I hate tardy people!

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The problem is you see, you made assumptions. You assumed she was prettier or younger or had a better job than me. That wasn't the case so any opinion or POV you have isn't going to be helpful, you see. It's all in the details, laddie...details.

What's a good pal situation?

I also hate tardiness which is why I almost hugged the instructors when they were just happy to see me. This is a continuing education class, I don't even get credit for my degree for it. You can show up, take the materials and study on your own and then pretest and they can't do anything about it. That does not excuse my tardiness, however.

I can't help but wonder, though, if she kept sighing out of frustration because she did tell the instructor when we were introducing ourselves that she didn't want to be there. We were asked where we'd rather be and what we'd be doing. I simply said, I'd rather be here.

And it's true. This is a certification that will give my customers more reassurance. And that's what matters to me.

Matera the Mad said:

I cow now and then.

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

I've been in places I'd rather not be, but I generally try not to aggravate the livestock. I think she deserved it.
lolz

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aggravate the livestock---love it!

Whether or not she deserved it, I did something I rarely do. I stood my ground.