PDA

View Full Version : Are any of you private recluses? Hermits, maybe?


askcb
04-24-2009, 07:49 AM
So, I don't consider myself shy, but my husband fondly calls me anntisocial when no one is listening. I just wonder if this is maybe a writer trait, or if I am alone here.

I have always preferred the company of a good book to a good many people, and quiet over noise. I could easily imagine myself in a sprawling farmhouse with neighbors far enough away that I could pretend they were nonexistent, with only family and maybe some barnyard animals to call friends. I do hang out with others but sometimes, okay, a lot of times, getting lost inside my own head is more satisfying.

Anyone??

thethinker42
04-24-2009, 07:57 AM
I'm quite reclusive, particularly since I moved to Japan.

I have a very hard time approaching people. Most of my friends are from school, work, or the internet. Since I am neither going to school nor working, it makes it hard for me to meet people. I've never had much luck getting on with the other military spouses, and the ones in this housing area seem to think I'm a snob. They don't realize that I *can* hear them talking behind their hands when I'm out walking...they think I'm being antisocial because I'm often in my own little world when I go walking. The reason for this is that I take walks to sort out plot problems, so I'm just very focused, not trying to be a bitch...but hearing them talk about me that way doesn't make it easy to approach them to try to make friends, know what I mean?

That said, I don't mind the solitude. I rarely leave the house, spend most of my time writing, and just socialize with my husband. When we both need some human contact, we go out with some of the guys he works with. Otherwise, we're both pretty content with each other, the kitties, and using the internet to communicate with other people. (ETA: We do leave the house quite a bit to go exploring on the island, we just don't socialize much)

I guess people might think it's sad that I spend more time with people I've never met than anyone (besides my husband), but it suits me. Besides my husband, I probably spend more time with scarletpeaches than anyone else, and we've never been on the same continent. *shrug* As I said, it suits me.

Maybe it's a writer thing. I'm just happier when I spend more time alone with my characters.

bettielee
04-24-2009, 08:05 AM
askb - I barely leave the studio (apartment). I went to the MOVIES last night. Where there are lots of people. And there was no fire and the apt wasn't being fumigated. I do ok with one or two people - but more than that, even with a large group consisting of my family, I sort of tune out and just listen to what's going on, and hang out where I can be inconspicuous. I prefer animals to people.

P.H.Delarran
04-24-2009, 08:07 AM
I'm kinda a funny mix where I like to be around a lot of people but don't really need (or want even) to interact-like to stay on the edges and watch, absorb the noise, form opinions and offer sarcastic comments that I mumble aloud, whether or not anyone is within hearing distance.

Clair Dickson
04-24-2009, 08:25 AM
My preference is to be antisocial. Funny thing is, I'm an alternative high school teacher (though, I would argue, that's not social, that's work.) I hate everyone first, then sort out the ones I hate less. =) So far my Hubby is the person I hate least and least often.

I love forums because I can interact when and how I feel like it. I can participate in a conversation without having to fight to be hear (well, most of the time) and I can ignore conversations (or people) I don't care for. This is harder in real life-- you can only smile and nod for so long. Inevitably someone feels the need to talk to the wallflower. (I wouldn't be sitting over here not talking unless I wanted to...)

Not all writers are antisocial (or otherwise reclusive). Some certainly are. Perhaps it's because we can control the world we write in (either by when or even the whole world). Perhaps it's because the writing is not us, and thereofre the conversations are not personal. Perhaps it is because we are detached, separated from the things we explore-- thus safe. Perhaps it is none of these, but a random thing. Perhaps there are just as many anti-social people in other hobbies or professions. Sometimes, we look for patterns to comfort ourselves-- even though our sample size is inadequate.

Either way, I know that I prefer the company of fiction to people, with the exception of the one person who has managed to slip past the porcupine quills.

Gehanna
04-24-2009, 08:57 AM
I've been trying to change my reclusiveness. Unfortunately, I am also beginning to rediscover why I became a recluse in the first place.

Sincerely,
Gehanna

backslashbaby
04-24-2009, 09:00 AM
I do both, and I come up even on Extrovert vs Introvert :) I crave both, and it can be hard for folks to understand that I want to stay in for 3 days and write after we had so much fun painting the town red.

The internet has been wonderful for allowing me to keep up with more people than I could in 'real' life. It takes a lot of time to see everyone and my characters all those hours in a week!

dgrintalis
04-24-2009, 09:24 AM
I can be fairly antisocial. That being said, my day job is as a pro belly dancer so I have to be social sometimes, but I am most happy being at home. My car has been dead for several weeks (waiting for the tax refund checks so we get the engine rebuilt) and honestly, I am pretty ok with it. It just means I have to wait until my husband gets home before I can run any needed errands, but...

Yes, I am a hardcore introvert and prefer being a little reclusive.

Manix
04-24-2009, 09:32 AM
I rank equally intro/extrovert on tests that measure such quirks, but I would have to say that I prefer being alone in a library with a good book to being at a party with people. To be honest, I don't like going out of my way to make friends, but once I do, I'm extremely loyal. I love my time alone and if I didn't force myself to get out of my own little world, I'd definitely end up being a recluse.

Cranky
04-24-2009, 09:34 AM
I don't like crowds and noise and lots of activity. It aggravates my nerves and gives me headaches. I get grouchy. I have a hard time sharing space sometimes even with my family, whom I love dearly. But with four boys and a grown man bouncing around, doing their wrestling/ballthrowing/dinosaur/action figure wars, there's a lot of noise a lot of the time, so I don't get much respite from it in any event.

I actually like people, at least one-on-one. I like talking to them, getting to know them, swapping jokes, etc. I just have a hard time being face-to-face. I've never had more than a handful of friends in real life anyway. :)

Hmm. So I'm not really "anti-social" per se...I'm more anti-noise and anti-chaos. :D

mario_c
04-24-2009, 09:37 AM
Total introvert and recluse - given the choice, I would be in bed writing and reading all day, or out in the wilderness somewhere. Not healthy, and not good for one in need of a better career, and...just bad. I was never like this when I was younger - does exposure to other people cause one to be more antisocial over time?

<-Leading to said syndrome :ROFL:

triceretops
04-24-2009, 09:47 AM
I'm all over the reclusive thing in spades.

tri

Sweetleaf
04-24-2009, 09:58 AM
I would give anything to live as far away from other people as possible. I could happily never go out again. I sure as hell don't miss working.

GO THE CREATIVE RECLUSE CLUB! :e2woo:

fringle
04-24-2009, 09:58 AM
I'm an introvert as well. For years, I've stayed home Mon-Fri, venturing out only on the weekends. But my darling husband started to get worried about me, so I've started writing in Starbucks, which is working out well.

The strange thing about me is that I travel a lot. I take an international trip about every 60 days or so. I can fly off to just about anywhere and be out and about and running around and having a great time. But when I'm home, I'm a hermit. I'm weird.

virtue_summer
04-24-2009, 09:58 AM
I'd say I can be somewhat of a recluse. I like spending time by myself, getting lost in my thoughts, which isn't to say that I'm completely antisocial. The fact is that I like people but I'm not big on small talk and I don't like crowds, both of which tend to present obstacles to meeting new people. I like to sit down with people in small groups and one on one, though. I like to get into deep conversations and to really learn more about the people I know, their history and what they think about different things and why. I relish these conversations. Unfortunately they don't come around that often. I also have a tendency to just get wrapped up in my latest story or in some other topic that's preying on my mind to the point where I don't mean to be antisocial but it happens because I'm just so interested in what I'm already doing or thinking about.

JustDee
04-24-2009, 10:14 AM
It's funny, when I was a kid everyone seemed to want me to be an extrovert. My grandmother, for example, liked to trot me out at all the family gatherings to sing or otherwise "perform". I hated it. I became an extrovert out of necessity - and sadly have become an introvert of circumstance. I'm not sure which I really am. If I had to guess, I'd say I'm a bit on the extrovert side, but I think its more Pavlovian than anything else.

One of my few remaining dreams is to live in an actual tree house some day - is that an introvert, or just geeky and weird? ;) And like a few others posting, I do seem to prefer animals (and trees) to people when given a choice.

BenPanced
04-24-2009, 10:20 AM
I'm incredibly reclusive, having expounded too much energy for so little in return, and have had it. I've been told I'm "too pushy" so I pull back a little. Then I get told I need to put myself out there, smile, and be myself. I have. I get told I'm being "too pushy". Repeat until dead.

I'm also getting to the point where I hate, hate, HATE being in crowds so I hardly ever do anything anymore. If I do, it's a kamikaze mission, hit-'n'-run to get what I need and get the hell out. If there's a movie I want to see (well, it's a PITA to get to a theatre from my place), I just wait for the DVD.

It also doesn't help that salespeople are becoming too helpful, in my book, practically tackling me by the knees when I walk into the store and immediately asking me if there was something I was looking for. I have told a couple, "I'm not sure, seeing as I've just walked into the store and haven't had a chance to look around yet." Whenever somebody does that, I can't relax because it feels like they're circling me like sharks and I can never really look for what I want, leaving a lot sooner than I'd planned.

About the only times I do enjoy going out are when I can get to my favorite coffee places so I can -- what else? -- write, provided I can get a decent table.

Dichroic
04-24-2009, 10:35 AM
I'm quite reclusive, particularly since I moved to Japan.


I'm in a similar situation as an expat in Taiwan. I do meet people at work, but the thing is that most of the Taiwanese at my job live in the town where our office is, while most expats live in Taipei, 40 minutes or so away. Our company is Dutch, so that's where most of the other expats are from. We do socialize some with them, but since I only speak a little Dutch and my husband even less (we lived there one year - it's a very easy language compared to Mandarin!) we end up being a little out of it in groups. Of course they all speak English fluently, but you can't always be asking a whole group to switch for you.

We've had little success in meeting people here outside work. In the Netherlands it was easier, because we're rowers. For years at home the rowing club was our main social outlet, and that fits well with the way people there socialize. In Taiwan, people seem mostly to socialize with coworkers or family.

Red_Dahlia
04-24-2009, 11:14 AM
I'm an complete introvert. It's not that I don't like people. In fact, I quite enjoy spending time with them when I'm in the mood for it. I've just come to the conclusion that I need ALOT more alone time than the average person. Unfortunately, whenever I tell my friends I need space, they always decide I must be upset about something. :Shrug:

Cassiopeia
04-24-2009, 11:39 AM
I am far more of a recluse here in the states than I was while living overseas in South Africa. Which is rather odd when you think about it, being that I am an American but I feel more at home there and much more accepted among the South Africans that I do here.

There's way to much pressure in my opinion to fit a certain mold in the states and if you change out of that mold or never fit it in the first place life can become rather uncomfortable in social settings.

I go out in spurts. Sometimes I enjoy it more than other times. I prefer the cooler months to be out and about.

Pilot
04-24-2009, 02:26 PM
Been a quiet man all my adult life, but since retiring, have abandoned the public almost totally. My profession, that of a pilot, gave me the opportunity to avoid interacting with people most of the time and I loved it. Even as a kid, I loved getting on my horse and riding by myself for hours on end. Now I don't have to put up with anyone but my wife and the occasional family visitor. Suits me just fine.

Adam
04-24-2009, 03:23 PM
I'm a big ole hermit and hardly ever leave the house nowadays.

People think I'm weird. They're right. :)

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 03:37 PM
I hate people.

thethinker42
04-24-2009, 03:38 PM
I hate people.

Me too. Rat bastards, all of them.

Except the ones on my computer. <3

Adam
04-24-2009, 03:42 PM
Snerk, SHINGers unite! :D


Seriously, most people suck.

Spring
04-24-2009, 03:43 PM
Well, I'll break this mold: I'm incredibly gregarious. I need human contact every single day. I always make plans to visit friends and crave interaction with others. I'm in a weekly French club and a monthly book group. I make friends at all my daughters' weekly activities. I love having small dinner parties and attending my street's weekly happy hour on Friday afternoons.

And online, I am an active moderator on a board with over 1000 women. I also have a few small, private forums I check in with every day.

Go figure.
:)
But with all that said, I like being alone too. I don't get lonely when I'm in my writing zone. It's just that after a few hours of solitude, I need to get out there into the web of humanity.

Pilot
04-24-2009, 04:06 PM
I hate people.

I'm curious: Do you really hate 'em, or did you simply grow weary of being continually disappointed?

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 04:10 PM
Dammit, I hate it when people play the philosophy card when I'm trying to be a misanthrope.

Pilot
04-24-2009, 04:13 PM
Uh huh. That's what I thought. I'll even push my luck by saying I bet you're a pretty good kid. :D

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 04:15 PM
*sigh*

Most people bore or disappoint me, so I prefer to stay away from all but those who have a similar sense of humour and world view, as trying to get on with people for whom I have no respect is a waste of energy better spent on writing, and associating with people I actually like.

That answer your question? :D

thethinker42
04-24-2009, 04:16 PM
*sigh*

Most people bore or disappoint me, so I prefer to stay away from all but those who have a similar sense of humour and world view, as trying to get on with people for whom I have no respect is a waste of energy better spent on writing, and associating with people I actually like.

That answer your question? :D

I wonder if I should take that as an insult or a compliment...

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 04:19 PM
*sigh*

Most people bore or disappoint me, so I prefer to stay away from all but those who have a similar sense of humour and world view, as trying to get on with people for whom I have no respect is a waste of energy better spent on writing, and associating with people I actually like.

That answer your question? :D

Yes, but now I have more questions.

Pilot
04-24-2009, 04:42 PM
*sigh*

Most people bore or disappoint me, so I prefer to stay away from all but those who have a similar sense of humour and world view, as trying to get on with people for whom I have no respect is a waste of energy better spent on writing, and associating with people I actually like.

That answer your question? :D

Sounds like something I'd say, except to add there are too few of those special people I've been able to find. Ever the optimist, I keep watching for them. http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/icons/icon12.gif

Adam
04-24-2009, 04:45 PM
*sigh*

Most people bore or disappoint me, so I prefer to stay away from all but those who have a similar sense of humour and world view, as trying to get on with people for whom I have no respect is a waste of energy better spent on writing, and associating with people I actually like.

That answer your question? :D

Hear hear! (had to look that up, thought it was "here here". :D )

;)

I spent 8 years working with the public, and developed a healthy contempt for the majority.

Spring
04-24-2009, 04:49 PM
May you all hug a dozen strangers today! :) :) :) and like it!

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 04:50 PM
May you all hug a dozen strangers today! :) :) :) and like it!

Can't.

Restraining order.

Adam
04-24-2009, 04:51 PM
May you all hug a dozen strangers today! :) :) :) and like it!

Never!

*Hides in his house with closed curtains, many varieties of booze, and a loaded shotgun.*

*Mumble mumble*

thethinker42
04-24-2009, 04:53 PM
May you all hug a dozen strangers today! :) :) :) and like it!

No. Not a chance.

And if they hug me, I can't be responsible for my actions.

*is not a touchy feely person, especially with strangers*

thethinker42
04-24-2009, 04:54 PM
Never!

*Hides in his house with closed curtains, many varieties of booze, and a loaded shotgun.*

*Mumble mumble*

SQUEEEE!!!!! Can I come over?? Please? Please? Can I???

Adam
04-24-2009, 04:55 PM
SQUEEEE!!!!! Can I come over?? Please? Please? Can I???

Ok, but use the back door. The front is rigged.

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 04:57 PM
I'll bring vodka and a really bad temper.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-24-2009, 04:58 PM
I can swing either way. If I'm at a family reunion or a work-related function or just out with friends, I can be a life of the party, but if pressed, I must confess I prefer my 'my time'. I love Ol' Boy to death and beyond, and I still look forward to his coming home from work (I usually beat him home by about an hour or two.); but I really, really, really like the house when it's quiet and the cats and dog are napping so I can withdraw into whatever world I've created to play in at the time. Being the 'public me' is a strain and wears me out pretty quickly... especially around family! :)

Adam
04-24-2009, 05:00 PM
I'll bring vodka and a really bad temper.

And marshmallows, I ran out. :(

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 05:01 PM
And marshmallows, I ran out. :(

That reminds me of The Marshmallow Game.

My record was 13 but my friend Jason got 17 in.

Adam
04-24-2009, 05:01 PM
I can swing either way. If I'm at a family reunion or a work-related function or just out with friends, I can be a life of the party, but if pressed, I must confess I prefer my 'my time'. I love Ol' Boy to death and beyond, and I still look forward to his coming home from work (I usually beat him home by about an hour or two.); but I really, really, really like the house when it's quiet and the cats and dog are napping so I can withdraw into whatever world I've created to play in at the time. Being the 'public me' is a strain and wears me out pretty quickly... especially around family! :)

If I'm around people I like, and I'm not trying to write, I can be as lovely as the next person.

The second they leave though... :rant:

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 05:04 PM
May you all hug a dozen strangers today! :) :) :) and like it!

The Adult Film Award are next month, I'll reserve my hugs for then.

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 05:05 PM
That reminds me of The Marshmallow Game.

My record was 13 but my friend Jason got 17 in.

In what?

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 05:07 PM
In what?

I was waiting for someone to ask that. :D

Adam
04-24-2009, 05:07 PM
That reminds me of The Marshmallow Game.

My record was 13 but my friend Jason got 17 in.

Sounds interesting.

I want video and I want it nao...

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-24-2009, 05:27 PM
I'm curious: Do you really hate 'em, or did you simply grow weary of being continually disappointed?

I had a history professor in college who shared this motto:

"Expect nothing of people and sometimes you'll be pleasantly surprised."

It has served me well.

stormie
04-24-2009, 05:37 PM
Yesterday a friend called, asking if I wanted to meet her for lunch. It took me five minutes to decide. For just that one measly hour of socializing! I did go and had a good time. But it was so hard to get back into writing when I came home.

Probably why so many writers are reclusive.

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 05:39 PM
I think we're all people-watchers and others confuse that with a desire to be sociable.

I don't want to mix with people. I want to be objective and watch them. That's how I collect ideas to put in my books - by observation, not participation.

Ambrosia
04-24-2009, 05:39 PM
A lot of people think that introvert means a person avoids people and extrovert means a person hangs out with people. What defines introvert and extrovert is not the amount of people a person spends their time with, but how a person gets 'restored'. For me, being around people is a drain on my energy.

I am very introverted. Although I can go out and mingle and whatnot, it tires me out. I hate crowds and much prefer to be off by myself reading or writing or just staring out the window than I do being in a room and expected to interact with a bunch of people who may not have had a deep thought in their lives.

If I am forced to be at a party or social gathering, I will do the small talk thing long enough to satisfy social protocol so people will leave me be, then find that other introvert in the room and take them aside for a meaningful conversation. I abhor small talk. My h, on the other hand, is a raving extrovert. It has made for a very interesting marriage. Especially since he never wants to go alone. *Sigh*.

Put me down for being a happy hermit if life would permit it. As long as I had Internet and coffee, of course. ;)

thethinker42
04-24-2009, 05:41 PM
I think we're all people-watchers and others confuse that with a desire to be sociable.

I don't want to mix with people. I want to be objective and watch them. That's how I collect ideas to put in my books - by observation, not participation.

Quoted for truth.

I love watching people, but don't particularly want to be involved with many of them. I like keeping them at the same distance I keep my characters: Close enough to see what's going on, far enough away that I don't get any of it on me.

Adam
04-24-2009, 05:45 PM
I love watching people too. From the lens of my high powered rifle.

"Pick up that litter!"

BANG!

Spring
04-24-2009, 05:48 PM
Never!

*Hides in his house with closed curtains, many varieties of booze, and a loaded shotgun.*

*Mumble mumble*

Well, I'll pop over to your home, too. And I'll open the curtains, make froofy cocktails from your booze, and, uh,...yah, I've got nothing chipper to add about your loaded shotgun (paint it pink, perhaps?).

:)

Ok, and now that I've been overly saccharine toward you all, I'll desist.

Adam
04-24-2009, 05:50 PM
Well, I'll pop over to your home, too. And I'll raise open the curtains, make froofy cocktails from your booze, and, uh,...yah, I've got nothing chipper to add about your loaded shotgun (paint it pink, perhaps?).

:)

Ok, and now that I've been overly saccharine toward you all, I'll desist.

Who says it ain't already pink?

I hide it in a tub of blancmange when the police come 'a callin' .

:D

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 05:51 PM
Doesn't that make it go 'splurt' when you try to shoot someone?

thethinker42
04-24-2009, 05:51 PM
Who says it ain't already pink?

I hide it in a tub of blancmange when the police come 'a callin' .

:D

*ears perk up* Did someone say-

Oh. "Callin'."


Thought you said Colin...

*slinks away*

Adam
04-24-2009, 05:53 PM
*ears perk up* Did someone say-

Oh. "Callin'."


Thought you said Colin...

*slinks away*

He's tied up in the basement. Go nuts. ;)



Doesn't that make it go 'splurt' when you try to shoot someone?

Totally not commenting on this. Too easy. ;)

tjwriter
04-24-2009, 06:53 PM
I was just thinking about this the other day.

Put me down on the mostly hermit side of the sliding scale. I used to enjoy going out a lot, but the older I've gotten, the less going I like to do. Every once in awhile, I'll get the urge, but lately staying home with my family is the thing. I like taking the girls to the park to play or playing games together.

Often, just coming here is enough social interaction. One of the reasons AW calls to me so is because it's one of the few places I can go for intelligent conversation most of the time. That's really what I like. And it being the internet, I can excuse myself without hurt feelings any time I've felt I've had enough.

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 07:56 PM
I had a history professor in college who shared this motto:

"Expect nothing of people and sometimes you'll be pleasantly surprised."

It has served me well.

Keep that in mind when it comes to bannifying me.

mscelina
04-24-2009, 08:04 PM
I am an extremely extroverted person. I love being out, love being in crowds, love meeting new people and go out of my way to do so.

However, I am also a workaholic and that has neccesitated changes in my social behavior. Add to that a healthy dose of cynicism and a low tolerance for idiots (you can thank bartending for that) and I'm more than content to stay at home and crank out my stories. Every once in a while, my social nature drives me out of my den but not that often any more. I'll add one more thing to this: I hate, loathe and despise shopping. I hate grocery stores, department stores and little mom and pop stores. The only place I go to shop any more is Walmart, and even then I go at 2 am so I can avoid the people who shuffle along with their carts and get in my way. Any social activity that doesn't involve a grocery cart works for me--but for God's sake keep the stores away from me!

That being said, I'm retreating to my office and writing for a few more hours. Hopefully I won't have to deal with some idiot ringing my doorbell any time soon.

BenPanced
04-24-2009, 08:25 PM
*DING DONG!*

Candygram.

Adam
04-24-2009, 08:27 PM
*Arms the bear traps*

Come in, door's open! ;)

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 08:29 PM
All Adztraps are easily discombobulated if you bribe the man himself with creme eggs and porn.:D

Adam
04-24-2009, 08:33 PM
All Adztraps are easily discombobulated if you bribe the man himself with creme eggs and porn.:D

Iz true, especially that last bit.

Pilot
04-24-2009, 08:33 PM
*DING DONG!*

Candygram.

For Mongo?

Adam
04-24-2009, 08:35 PM
For Mongo?

:ROFL:

I need to go watch Blazing Saddles again.

Greenify13
04-24-2009, 08:56 PM
Is the discussion still on the original post discussion or has it mutated?
Anyway I am reclusive, I leave home maybe once a week. Today, I had no idea it was Friday until I saw something that Susie had posted like "TGIF". I had no idea, I don't need to know because I don't go anywhere. My mother thinks this is pathetic because I live near Houston, TX; and I am missing out on all the cool Houston things...:Shrug: And I always wanted to be a hermit on a mountain, I mean I can sustain my life and what "out there" is worth being out there for?

(okay, okay sometimes I leave twice a week. but the past two weeks have only been once...)

Pilot
04-24-2009, 09:24 PM
My mother thinks this is pathetic because I live near Houston, TX; and I am missing out on all the cool Houston things...:Shrug: )

Joyce and I are negotiating on a 55' Chris Craft right now, Greenie. If it works out, you'll have to join us for a cruise sometime. We'll probably keep it on Clear Lake.

2old2pb
04-24-2009, 09:34 PM
Lemme see. I live about 7700 miles away from my home. My home is about 3000 miles from where I grew up. I work with 12 people, I only have to deal with a few at a time, lucky me. The only thing I don't like about working here is dealing with prima donna airtraffic controlers. I've been here for a year and I'll probably stay if I can.

Oh, and my favorite cartoon is "The Cat that Hated People". Do I qualify?

NeuroFizz
04-24-2009, 09:38 PM
Do any of y'all eyeballs-in-the darkened-windows need someone to do your shopping? I hardly ever confuse depilatory cream with canned whipped cream, but when I do, it seems to add clarity to one's social communication.

William Haskins
04-24-2009, 09:40 PM
yes

2old2pb
04-24-2009, 09:43 PM
Internet shopping is the answer, to everything.

Do any of y'all eyeballs-in-the darkened-windows need someone to do your shopping? I hardly ever confuse depilatory cream with canned whipped cream, but when I do, it seems to add clarity to one's social communication.

robeiae
04-24-2009, 09:45 PM
I don't hate people. I just don't want them living in my neighborhood.

Zipotes
04-24-2009, 09:56 PM
I'm shy and somewhat antisocial. I'd rather not have company or go out visiting. But, then again, there is another side to me. I miss it at times and have to stifle the bad girl away because she isn't allowed out.

Greenify13
04-24-2009, 10:03 PM
Joyce and I are negotiating on a 55' Chris Craft right now, Greenie. If it works out, you'll have to join us for a cruise sometime. We'll probably keep it on Clear Lake.
That sounds truly awesome Pilot! :e2cloud9: I think that would be truly cool, but then again I haven't been on any sort of water craft in many-many years so it sounds terrific. :D

I can go along time without realizing I hadn't left home, and then when I do I feel a moments regret, but heck atleast I will get out every once in a while...

Mela
04-24-2009, 10:03 PM
I like people who engage me with their views of the world or with their perspectives on life. With those sorts of people I'm all ears - the most social human in the world.
When it comes to self-asborbed I-I-I, me me me people I am a hermit crab, anti-social, recluse.

2old2pb
04-24-2009, 10:03 PM
I'm not crazy about being labeled antisocial. It has that dreaded second definition of :

2. hostile or harmful to orginized society.

I think I'm more of the first definition:

1. unsociable.

Pilot
04-24-2009, 10:10 PM
I'm not crazy about being labeled antisocial. It has that dreaded second definition of :

2. hostile or harmful to orginized society.

I think I'm more of the first definition:

1. unsociable.

At least you care what others think of you. Afraid I flat don't give a hang. Like Popeye says, "I yam what I yam and that's all what I yam".

Pilot
04-24-2009, 10:16 PM
That sounds truly awesome Pilot! :e2cloud9: I think that would be truly cool, but then again I haven't been on any sort of water craft in many-many years so it sounds terrific. :D

This thing is more like a floating condo than a boat. Weighs in at about 70,000 pounds, I think. Real speedster, too. Every bit of 18 mph. (There goes the water skiing) Three bedrooms, three baths, kitchen, dining...all that junk. Strictly a slow-motion, kick-back and relax kind of deal. Lots of deck space for enjoying the sun. Hope it works out.

2old2pb
04-24-2009, 10:17 PM
Well, I don't want to be hastled. Best to be off the RADAR. Oh, I live in the desert, that's good for hermit status right?

Greenify13
04-24-2009, 10:19 PM
This thing is more like a floating condo than a boat. Weighs in at about 70,000 pounds, I think. Real speedster, too. Every bit of 18 mph. (There goes the water skiing) Three bedrooms, three baths, kitchen, dining...all that junk. Strictly a slow-motion, kick-back and relax kind of deal. Lots of deck space for enjoying the sun. Hope it works out.
Oh wow, I think I might live my life through hearing of yours. :D Sounds like an amazing craft. And I am sure you and Joyce deserve such a luxury! :heart:

Pilot
04-24-2009, 10:24 PM
Oh wow, I think I might live my life through hearing of yours. :D Sounds like an amazing craft. And I am sure you and Joyce deserve such a luxury! :heart:

Don't let me glamorize it too much. It's a long way from being a new boat, but at least it is fiberglass so the maintenance shouldn't be all that bad. Fresh overhaul on the diesels. Here's a major downside: about a gallon of diesel fuel for each mile traveled. Bummer. http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/icons/icon9.gif

Greenify13
04-24-2009, 10:28 PM
Don't let me glamorize it too much. It's a long way from being a new boat, but at least it is fiberglass so the maintenance shouldn't be all that bad. Fresh overhaul on the diesels. Here's a major downside: about a gallon of diesel fuel for each mile traveled. Bummer. http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/icons/icon9.gif
True bummer :(. But it is more for the slow travel and relaxation...I don't think going great distances in it is what you had in mind. :)
And besides, new stuff today...breaks more easily then the built to last older things...like homes...

KTC
04-24-2009, 10:31 PM
So, I don't consider myself shy, but my husband fondly calls me anntisocial when no one is listening. I just wonder if this is maybe a writer trait, or if I am alone here.

I have always preferred the company of a good book to a good many people, and quiet over noise. I could easily imagine myself in a sprawling farmhouse with neighbors far enough away that I could pretend they were nonexistent, with only family and maybe some barnyard animals to call friends. I do hang out with others but sometimes, okay, a lot of times, getting lost inside my own head is more satisfying.

Anyone??

I'm a social midget. I'm terrible at small talk. I'd rather just say, 'oh for god's sake, shut your mouth' than make small talk. I'm not crazy about social gatherings. I've been called antisocial too. I just can't be bothered with the charade parade.

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 10:33 PM
I'm a social midget. I'm terrible at small talk. I'd rather just say, 'oh for god's sake, shut your mouth' than make small talk. I'm not crazy about social gatherings. I've been called antisocial too. I just can't be bothered with the charade parade.

Me too, we should hang out...

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 10:34 PM
In separate rooms?

Pilot
04-24-2009, 10:37 PM
True bummer :(. But it is more for the slow travel and relaxation...I don't think going great distances in it is what you had in mind. :)
And besides, new stuff today...breaks more easily then the built to last older things...like homes...

You've got that right. I'm retired, not rich.

Oops. My apologies to the thread. Me and my big mouth. Sorry for the sidetrack.

KTC
04-24-2009, 10:38 PM
In separate rooms?

that i could live with. as long as he doesn't start trying to morse code me on the walls. ack. i don't even know how to say shut up in morse.

scarletpeaches
04-24-2009, 10:43 PM
Say it with a knuckle-duster instead.

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 10:48 PM
A knuckle duster will only get me excited.

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 10:50 PM
I once answered no to "Have you ever been to prison" on a job application and the interviewer laughed.

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 10:50 PM
I got the job.

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 10:51 PM
True story.

KTC
04-24-2009, 10:52 PM
A knuckle duster will only get me excited.

dot dot dot/dot dot dot dot/dot dot dash/dash dot dot dash/dot dash dash dot.

Greenify13
04-24-2009, 10:59 PM
(short gap) (short gap) (s.g.) (medium gap) (s.g.)

:D

Wayne K
04-24-2009, 11:00 PM
What was the question again?

KTC
04-24-2009, 11:01 PM
(short gap) (short gap) (s.g.) (medium gap) (s.g.)

:D

please. i was trying to be literary.

DragonHeart
04-24-2009, 11:05 PM
I've never been a very social person. I can handle being around a couple of people for awhile but dealing with groups of people (especially large crowds) is a real drain on me. I can't even hang around and socialize with family members for more than a couple of hours at a time.

To make it even worse, I work in retail. Thankfully I've been there for awhile and I'm friends with many of my coworkers. Over the years they've come to understand that I have a difficult time dealing with the job sometimes, and they don't push me when I hit my limit. I just have a very low tolerance for being around other people, I guess.

I don't necessarily hate people, I'm just not very comfortable around most of them. It's hard, but I'm actually doing quite a bit better than just a few years ago. I'll never be an outgoing sort of person but I'm not completely withdrawn anymore either. I get along quite well with the majority of my coworkers so I'm not as stressed or anxious, and I even make an effort to interact with the new hires so they don't feel as isolated as I did when I first got hired.

It's not all rainbows and sunshine though, I still have plenty of bad days where I really have to struggle to make it through my shift, but overall I'm learning to cope well enough with my social deficiencies, all things considered.

Greenify13
04-24-2009, 11:05 PM
please. i was trying to be literary.
I honestly did not see your post before mine was posted...I started it, walked away and put the child in his bed-came back submitted and there was yours. I did think for a minute to delete the post...:D But I don't like to delete posts...not really...:)

KTC
04-24-2009, 11:12 PM
I honestly did not see your post before mine was posted...I started it, walked away and put the child in his bed-came back submitted and there was yours. I did think for a minute to delete the post...:D But I don't like to delete posts...not really...:)


lol. that's too funny. don't you dare delete it. (-;

Amarie
04-24-2009, 11:36 PM
Me too. Rat bastards, all of them.

Except the ones on my computer. <3

:D

I once heard the definition of an introverted is someone who is worn out after attending a social event, while an extrovert is energized from other people.

I'm a total introvert.

Greenify13
04-25-2009, 01:17 AM
lol. that's too funny. don't you dare delete it. (-;
:ROFL: then I won't!
:D

I once heard the definition of an introverted is someone who is worn out after attending a social event, while an extrovert is energized from other people.

I'm a total introvert.
I can't help but wonder...if I'm not an extrovert and not an introvert, then what in the world am I? A plain-Jane loser or what? :)

cray
04-25-2009, 01:18 AM
i'm an innie.







oh. i forgot that my pip is totally exposed.
yea, i'm an outie.

Ol' Fashioned Girl
04-25-2009, 02:37 AM
For Mongo?

:ROFL:

I need to go watch Blazing Saddles again.

I confess... I thought the same things. :)

backslashbaby
04-25-2009, 05:03 AM
I'm seeing a definite leaning toward introspective folks. Writers, yeah :)

With mine (half n half) I also have a pattern to it. If I'm energized by introspection for one period of time, I begin to crave interaction. Interaction definitely energizes me, but enough of it and then I crave fishing on a lonely island for a few days, maybe.

I'd have thought that most people were like me, because it makes perfect sense, right?

Yeah, inevitably I end up confusing everyone ;)

---note, I'm definitely not bi-polar, but my sister is. Maybe it is vaguely related.

Matera the Mad
04-25-2009, 05:56 AM
Go away. Beat it. Leave me alone. Bugger off.

Jaycinth
04-25-2009, 07:06 AM
I revel in my innate sociopathicness and I often wonder if the people in the car in front of me even stop to think that their driving might just become my trigger event.


...just...kidding....ish.

dgrintalis
04-25-2009, 08:01 AM
Shopping was mentioned a few posts back. We have a 24 hour grocery store and I go at 2 or 3 in the morning. It is fantastic! There is no one there and only a handful of store personnel and they are all fairly antisocial. (Even if they are just tired, they leave me alone. Maybe I look psycho?)

And the store has self-checkout. Even better!

I really don't dislike people. Well, um, right, oh hell. Yes, I do. I hate big crowds and small talk... <<shudders>>

It is pretty nice to know that I'm not the only psycho recluse.

Shadow_Ferret
04-25-2009, 08:18 AM
I am not reclusive. I just have too high a standard for people and no one has yet lived up to it. So why associate with such inferiority?

Pilot
04-25-2009, 12:13 PM
(short gap) (short gap) (s.g.) (medium gap) (s.g.)

:D

.../-.-/.-/-.--/ / ../.-../.-../ / -..././ / --./---/---/-.. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-chores033.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)

Dichroic
04-25-2009, 04:01 PM
Is the discussion still on the original post discussion or has it mutated?
Anyway I am reclusive, I leave home maybe once a week. Today, I had no idea it was Friday until I saw something that Susie had posted like "TGIF". I had no idea, I don't need to know because I don't go anywhere. My mother thinks this is pathetic because I live near Houston, TX; and I am missing out on all the cool Houston things...

*What* cool Houston things??????? (I ask this because I lived there for 7 years once. The only cool thing I found was my husband, and I took him with me when I left.)

Pilot: Where do you fly out of, Ellington? My husband got his VFR there. (I got mine in Arizona. Much better visibility!!) And going slow in a boat on Clear Lake sounds like a very good idea; there are occasional rowers on that lake and some of them are friends of mine. (Yeah, OK, I did meet a few cool *people* in Houston.) Years ago some idiot in a cigarette boat on Clear Lake ran across a rower in a single; tore the boat in half and sent the rower to hospital.

robeiae
04-25-2009, 04:16 PM
.../-.-/.-/-.--/ / ../.-../.-../ / -..././ / --./---/---/-.. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-chores033.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)
This is a family board. Keep it clean.

Pilot
04-25-2009, 06:39 PM
This is a family board. Keep it clean.

If that's a joke, it would be nice if you'd use a smiley to indicate same. If your comment is not a joke, I'd suggest you learn Morse. The message is something you'd like to hear your 5-year old say.

robeiae
04-25-2009, 06:46 PM
If that's a joke, it would be nice if you'd use a smiley to indicate same. If your comment is not a joke, I'd suggest you learn Morse. The message is something you'd like to hear your 5-year old say.
It's a joke. And I thought that pretty apparent. Sorry.

Pilot
04-25-2009, 06:53 PM
Pilot: Where do you fly out of, Ellington? My husband got his VFR there. (I got mine in Arizona. Much better visibility!!) And going slow in a boat on Clear Lake sounds like a very good idea; there are occasional rowers on that lake and some of them are friends of mine. (Yeah, OK, I did meet a few cool *people* in Houston.) Years ago some idiot in a cigarette boat on Clear Lake ran across a rower in a single; tore the boat in half and sent the rower to hospital.

We keep the 411 at Sugar Land Regional. That's only about 5 miles from our home and is much more reasonable than Houston West. They're just finishing up a major revamp of the field, too. Your weather contains a lot of severe clear, granted, but goodness, all that sand and heat. I've been flying so long I just file IFR, punch through and go VFR on top.

I hope the boat thing works out. Been a while since I had one and always loved the water. Remember when the quarterback with his high-speed boat killed that person? Those are the ones that tend to make recluses of us.

Pilot
04-25-2009, 07:15 PM
It's a joke. And I thought that pretty apparent. Sorry.

I sent you a PM, robeiae. My rep button has never worked more than sporadically. Thanks.

scarletpeaches
04-25-2009, 07:33 PM
Quick tip for newbs and those unfamiliar with the guy:

Ignore everything Robovowels says. :D

That is all.

Greenify13
04-25-2009, 07:35 PM
.../-.-/.-/-.--/ / ../.-../.-../ / -..././ / --./---/---/-.. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-chores033.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)
:ROFL: :roll: :ROFL:
*What* cool Houston things??????? (I ask this because I lived there for 7 years once. The only cool thing I found was my husband, and I took him with me when I left.)

Pilot: Where do you fly out of, Ellington? My husband got his VFR there. (I got mine in Arizona. Much better visibility!!) And going slow in a boat on Clear Lake sounds like a very good idea; there are occasional rowers on that lake and some of them are friends of mine. (Yeah, OK, I did meet a few cool *people* in Houston.) Years ago some idiot in a cigarette boat on Clear Lake ran across a rower in a single; tore the boat in half and sent the rower to hospital.
Ouch! And I can't think of any cool things in Houston, now I like the Zoo but I have a 17 mnth old son, and it amsuses the heck out of him. One day I want to go to the museums, I love musuems, for now the zoo is cool enough. Even though there are better zoos out there...:)
This is a family board. Keep it clean.
:ROFL: :roll: :ROFL:

Sean D. Schaffer
04-25-2009, 07:49 PM
So, I don't consider myself shy, but my husband fondly calls me anntisocial when no one is listening. I just wonder if this is maybe a writer trait, or if I am alone here.

I have always preferred the company of a good book to a good many people, and quiet over noise. I could easily imagine myself in a sprawling farmhouse with neighbors far enough away that I could pretend they were nonexistent, with only family and maybe some barnyard animals to call friends. I do hang out with others but sometimes, okay, a lot of times, getting lost inside my own head is more satisfying.

Anyone??


The only place I'm outgoing is online. I prefer to be at home, alone, and pretty much in my own world most of the time. I haven't been that way in the last several years, but that's only because I thought I HAD to be outgoing to be anything in this world. I've since learned that that is simply not the case. I'm a lot closer to accepting myself than I've ever been, now, and I'm pretty happy about that. :)

robeiae
04-25-2009, 07:50 PM
Quick tip for newbs and those unfamiliar with the guy:

Ignore everything Robovowels says. :D

That is all.
I'm getting more of those "you can't read this" messages. Is there someone else in this thread?

mscelina
04-25-2009, 07:51 PM
That's okay, Rob. I thought it was funny. ;)

Adam
04-25-2009, 08:49 PM
Me too. Have a picture of a cake - :Cake:

Pilot
04-25-2009, 08:55 PM
Quick tip for newbs and those unfamiliar with the guy:

Ignore everything Robovowels says. :D

That is all.

I still tend toward taking myself and life too seriously, Scarlet. I'm workin' on it. :D

Wayne K
04-25-2009, 09:44 PM
It's a shame you didn't know Robivowel before it, that post was priceless.

rhymegirl
04-26-2009, 01:10 AM
I've been trying to figure out how to answer this question.

I like spending a certain amount of time alone but I wouldn't want to do that all the time. When I lived alone I was always calling someone on the phone to have somebody to talk to since it was just SOOOOOOOOO quiet.

But I am picky about who I hang out with. I like people who are smart, funny, creative and interesting.

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 01:23 AM
I like people who are smart, funny, creative and interesting.

I'll let you know if I think of anyone.

Adam
04-26-2009, 01:27 AM
But I am picky about who I hang out with. I like people who are smart, funny, creative and interesting.

Excluding immediate family, I'm lucky if I get one of the four around here.

scarletpeaches
04-26-2009, 01:38 AM
Well there's me and I'm incredibly good-looking as well.

Adam
04-26-2009, 01:41 AM
Well there's me and I'm incredibly good-looking as well.

Ooh, FIVE out of four. You'll do. ;)

rhymegirl
04-26-2009, 02:13 AM
I'll let you know if I think of anyone.

Hmm. Maybe I should have clarified what I said. A person doesn't have to have all four of those qualities for me to hang out with them. Just funny is okay. Just smart is okay. Just interesting is okay. Just creative is okay.

All four is just gravy.

Adam
04-26-2009, 02:17 AM
Hmm. Maybe I should have clarified what I said. A person doesn't have to have all four of those qualities for me to hang out with them. Just funny is okay. Just smart is okay. Just interesting is okay. Just creative is okay.

All four is just gravy.

Try Scarlet, I just bumped her up to six. ;)

Pilot
04-26-2009, 02:17 AM
Hmmm...Well, since I'm just old, fat and ugly, guess that lets me out. Shucks. :D

(See, Scarlet? I tol' ya I was workin' on it!)

scarletpeaches
04-26-2009, 02:34 AM
Hmmm...Well, since I'm just old, fat and ugly, guess that lets me out. Shucks. :D

(See, Scarlet? I tol' ya I was workin' on it!)

Yay! :D

Uh, I mean...yay that you're being sarcastic. Not that you're old, fat and ugly.

Or something.

I'll be off, then.

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 03:02 AM
Hmm. Maybe I should have clarified what I said. A person doesn't have to have all four of those qualities for me to hang out with them. Just funny is okay. Just smart is okay. Just interesting is okay. Just creative is okay.

All four is just gravy.

I'm having trouble with one.

rhymegirl
04-26-2009, 03:31 AM
I'm having trouble with one.

Are you talking about yourself or people you know?

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 03:32 AM
Earth.

rhymegirl
04-26-2009, 03:34 AM
No one on earth is funny, smart, creative or interesting???

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 03:40 AM
Which is why the aliens don't stay.

LaurieD
04-26-2009, 03:52 AM
Are any of you private recluses? Hermits, maybe?

Not sure how much of a hermit I am, but I do tend to be a bit recluse-ish and have been for ages.

I like to people watch, but not necessarily interact with most people. Being fake, shallow, self-righteous, and pompous are too frequently dominant character traits in my little corner of the world and it just annoys me.

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 03:58 AM
. Being fake, shallow, self-righteous, and pompous are too frequently dominant character traits in my little corner of the world and it just annoys me.
Check and mate!

Pilot
04-26-2009, 04:52 AM
This has been an interesting thread. Makes one wonder if writers really are a bit of a breed apart.

Adam
04-26-2009, 04:55 AM
A breed above, more like!

AMIRIGHT BROTHERS AND SISTERS?

:D

LaurieD
04-26-2009, 05:00 AM
I'm afeared of heights, so I guess I'm more a breed sideways

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 05:11 AM
I'm a breed unto myself.

Dichroic
04-26-2009, 07:26 AM
We keep the 411 at Sugar Land Regional. That's only about 5 miles from our home and is much more reasonable than Houston West. They're just finishing up a major revamp of the field, too. Your weather contains a lot of severe clear, granted, but goodness, all that sand and heat. I've been flying so long I just file IFR, punch through and go VFR on top.


Sand's not a problem, but dust devils are. (OK, you wouldn't want to fly in a sand storm, but those are actually storms, often with lightning, so you wouldn't anyway.) After going through IFR training I concluded I have too much going on in my life to be focused enough to safely fly IFR, so I'll try it again some year when I have fewer distractions - like after retirement.

Meanwhile, I'm not flying at all just now because I live in Taiwan at the moment and there is *no* GA here. (They don't want anyone flying across the China Strait, is why.)

benbradley
04-26-2009, 08:16 AM
No one on earth is funny, smart, creative or interesting???

Which is why the aliens don't stay.
"Beam me up, Scotty, there's no funny, smart, creative or interesting life here."

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 08:19 AM
"I would but I'm "ahem* briefing, Ohura"

Pilot
04-26-2009, 08:20 AM
After going through IFR training I concluded I have too much going on in my life to be focused enough to safely fly IFR, so I'll try it again some year when I have fewer distractions - like after retirement..)

I was USAF trained and they start you on the gauges almost as soon as they show you how to start the engine. With well over 18,000 hours now, IFR is pretty much second nature to me. http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys/smiley-gen003.gif (http://www.freesmileys.org)

Meanwhile, I'm not flying at all just now because I live in Taiwan at the moment and there is *no* GA here. (They don't want anyone flying across the China Strait, is why.)

Now THIS is a severe bummer! I do hope you won't be stuck in that particular situation too long. http://www.absolutewrite.com/forums/images/icons/icon9.gif

rhymegirl
04-26-2009, 08:37 AM
"Beam me up, Scotty, there's no funny, smart, creative or interesting life here."

:ROFL:

Now that is funny.

jodiodi
04-26-2009, 10:22 AM
I don't know if I've replied to this thread or not. I'm not inclined to search through it.

I'm a recluse and loathe seeing people. Actually, I always wished I was one of those friendly people who enjoys company and is involved in stuff. However, for numerous reasons, I didn't turn out that way and now I'm so used to being a hermit, I can't be anything else.

chrysalnix
04-26-2009, 09:42 PM
I wouldnt consider myself a recluse since I work as a cube rat all day long, five days a week. However, on the weekends its usually just me, my studies (Ive gone back to school), reading, writing, and walking at the local park.

Without my job, Id probably have to force myself out of the house. Im not good at small talk, but talking about writing will make me rattle on like a wind-up doll. I get my energy from people (extravert), but prefer to watch and listen more than speak (introvert). Its an okay balance and keeps me out of trouble. You know how we office curmudgeons can get pretty wild okay maybe not.

I've always wished I was one of those people who could talk about anything and everything.

Sophia
04-26-2009, 09:47 PM
I'm interested in the number of people who mention people-watching in this thread. How do you do it? I imagine that if I even sneaked a sideways glance at someone, they'd come over and say, "WTF are you looking at?" and it would be terrible.

scarletpeaches
04-26-2009, 09:53 PM
I'm so pretty no-one minds if I stare at them.

Actually it's not staring. It's watching. It's easy in groups or crowds (neither of which I enjoy being a part of but I'll happily observe). You just adopt a "Hey ho, watching the world go by," demeanour and it's a piece of cake.

Ambrosia
04-26-2009, 10:11 PM
I'm interested in the number of people who mention people-watching in this thread. How do you do it? I imagine that if I even sneaked a sideways glance at someone, they'd come over and say, "WTF are you looking at?" and it would be terrible.People watching 101

It is all in paying attention to body language. You can pretty much tell when a person is going to turn your way to find you looking at them. Just turn your eyes away before they notice you are looking.

You can observe someone without obviously staring at them. Others can think I am looking at a painting when in reality I am looking at the person looking at the painting. Having something of interest near the person you are observing, whether it is a painting, a plant, or a lampshade helps. Then if someone challenges your sideways glance you can comment on that shade of wallpaper being unique and they feel like an idiot. Or, tell them you noticed their necklace, hair, whatever and was admiring it. Immediate diffusing of the situation and they become grateful you were observing them. And you get to watch that discomfiture too. :D It's all good.

Wayne K
04-26-2009, 10:26 PM
Pardon the way that I stare.
There's nothing else to compare.
The sight of you leaves me weak.
There are no words left to speak,
But if you feel like I feel,
Please let me know that it's real.
You're just too good to be true.
Can't take my eyes off you.

jodiodi
04-27-2009, 01:38 AM
Malls are great for people-watching. So is church, oddly enough. I also do it in restaurants: sit in a corner at a table and just watch the world go by. If you're self-concious, take a crossword puzzle book and pretend to do the puzzles. Your gazing into the distance can be seen as 'thinking'.