Week 4: Chatter

[Sarita]

Hmm, do you think younger finalists will have an advantage because of the topic? And wow, only 1000 words!

Great challenge, Jenna!

~Sara

[trumancoyote]

Not I, said the Zach. Though it was only 8 years ago, I've got the retention of a goldfish.

[William Haskins]

damn. it's too bad i used up my sex story ammunition last week...


(that's a joke, of course)

[paprikapink]

The younger you are the more likely that your only exposure to 7th grade was as a 7th grader. There are many other ways to gain perspective on that singular experience. Parent, teacher, neighbor...the older you are, the more of those experiences you may have under your hat.

-pkpk

[Birol]

I noticed only 1K words, but didn't she give an extra day to write, too?

[Sarita]

I noticed only 1K words, but didn't she give an extra day to write, too?

Oh yeah, Lori! Wonder if it was intentional? Man! I don't think I'll get to vote next week. Here's hoping I find an internet cafe by Tuesday...

[mommie4a]

A record for me! Posted in the JFF - God! I love when the pressure is OFF - nothing to do for a week now! (haha - if only that were true).

Good luck to the finalists and JFF entrants, which should be everybody else!!!

[Mr Underhill]

A record for me! Posted in the JFF - God!Yes, you had a humorous poem on the theme out seemingly within minutes of the announcement. Just like Skylar did last week. Hmm... something seems fishy there...

Actually a poem isn't a bad way to go for this one. I can't imagine anybody really would like to go back to the age of twelve.

And, it really has to be "The Seventh Grade" in terms of the adolescent school days I suppose? We can't just take the phrase and appropriate it for our purposes, coming up with something like the third degree or the seven-percent solution?

[mommie4a]

Nothing fishy, promise, Mr. Underhill. Seventh grade was a RICH year for me but not uniquely so - cute teacher flirted with guy and married him when we graduated six years later, kids teased me, we'd just moved to a new town, had braces, few friends, liked social studies. Trust me - all vanilla.

But ah...to be the PARENT of a seventh grader...man - WAY more adventurous. You have no idea - I'm Jewish, live in a community replete with Jews and seventh grade is synonymous with Bar/Bat Mitzvah. Just the culture here. No escaping them. That poem/song came WAY too easily, I fear. Even if it's only middling at best. But I enjoyed writing it, you know? So that was fun in itself.

[ShadowGuide]

If anyone who doesn't recall the 7th grade and has questions about what their (7th graders - not you, dear reader,...sorry about the lack of clarity, I'm on the mend from something flu-like) behavior is like, I taught 8th grade last year. I saw how the 7th graders acted, their challenges and how the 8th graders were when they arrived in my room and how/if they changed by the time the year was up. I warn you, though, I taught in a very rough area - nothing typical suburbia about it.
Anyway, just PM me if you have questions and I'll help where I can.

(The good news is this year I did move to suburbia and teach 9th grade, and am happy to say, it is a COMPLETELY different world!)

[maestrowork]

We might have to explain what "7th grade" is for those who are not from north America...

[firehorse]

We might have to explain what "7th grade" is for those who are not from north America...Canada: Grade Seven
UK (private schools): Lower Third Form (I think)
Rest of Euro: no idea

This is how I always get 'outed' as American-born, in conversations about school.

[DJP]

My goodness, the thread is awfully quiet this week. Everybody working that hard??

[Rhush]

Actually, I've been so busy with my trillion other obligations I haven't even started my story....yikes! Guess I'm going to have to slide some of my other writing obligations to the back of the file REALLY soon. And darn that 40 hr work week!

[firehorse]

Actually, I've been so busy with my trillion other obligations I haven't even started my story....yikes! My sentiments exactly!

[firehorse]

I'm stumped. I have a story, but I just can't seem to put two words together. And my anxiety is shutting me down even further, because then all I can think is, "I can't write." :Headbang:

So... how's everyone else doing?

[William Haskins]

awful

[Birol]

I'm stumped. I have a story, but I just can't seem to put two words together. And my anxiety is shutting me down even further, because then all I can think is, "I can't write." :Headbang:

So... how's everyone else doing?

Now why is it you think you can't write? You wrote this post, didn't you? And four entries so far? The entry for the initial round plus three finalist entries? And they were all good enough to get you this far. So take a deep breath and a walk around the block and try again. If that's not enough, take a night or two off to recharge the batteries. But don't give me this 'I can't write' nonsense; you're just tired is all.

[Birol]

Joanne's already posted. Where are the rest of you slackers* with my weekend reading material? ;)



*Excludes Firehorse

[Cassie88]

awful

lolllllllll

Isn't this a great theme for your humor?????

Cassie

[William Haskins]

i'll make you laugh so hard you'll spray someone else's milk out your nose...

[Cassie88]

Oh, God! Bring it on, William, please, bring it on...

Cassie

[jdkiggins]

Joanne's already posted. Where are the rest of you slackers* with my weekend reading material? ;)
*Excludes Firehorse

LOL, Birol. Don't let me rush you guys. ;) I needed to get mine up because I have so many things going on this week and weekend. Have fun writing and good luck.

[Rhush]

Ok. I have officially posted my entry. Get ready for and eighties flash back! :PartySmil

[jdkiggins]

Congrats! on posting, Rhush.

Five more to go! Three days to go! :D

[William Haskins]

quit it.

[jdkiggins]

http://www.smileys.ws/sm/messages/00000016.gif

[mommie4a]

GREAT emoticon!

[jdkiggins]

I think I found it on the site you recommended, Jill.

Sorry William. hehe

[William Haskins]

you girls are so damn wacky.

[mommie4a]

I'm telling you - I should stop playing with my avatar and just change my name to Wacky.

[jdkiggins]

Wow, William you figured out what my middle initial stands for.

Damn Wacky. LOL

[mommie4a]

ROFL, Damn.

[mommie4a]

Joanne Damn Wacky. Love it.

[jdkiggins]

Yep, that's it, Jill and William.


Joanne Damn Wacky Kiggins :roll:

[mommie4a]

How's mom?

[jdkiggins]

Thanks for asking, Jill. She still sounds horrible. She's got two days of meds to take and if it doesn't clear up, I think the doc will be putting her in the hospital.

[mommie4a]

Rats - I'm sorry to hear that. I had bronchitis last winter (2004) and went without seeing a doc for three months (bad girl, I know). I sounded horrible. Took nearly 10 days for the meds to start working.

[jdkiggins]

Yeah, been there. But my and the doc's concern is her age and lack of activity. I'm hoping by tomorrow she'll sound better.

I'm turning in. G'night all. :sleepy:

[Birol]

How close to the deadline cutoff do you think Truman and William will post?
Who will be the last to post, Truman or William or do you favor a longshot for this, ah, 'honor'?

[trumancoyote]

Hey, we're both very thorough boys.

We should take a vote on who looks better in a cowboy hat instead.

[Birol]

Hey, we're both very thorough boys.

We should take a vote on who looks better in a cowboy hat instead.

Macallister, of course. Oh, wait, does it have to be someone in the Idol contest?

[trumancoyote]

That's what I was thinking, yes.

But wouldn't it be fun to have a board-wide contest of who looks best in a cowboy hat?

The prize could be one of those ridiculous 34583495-gallon foam hats! :D

[BlueTexas]

I'm later than usual this time, but I bet I'll still beat those two! I finished a draft a minute ago. I have some word cutting to do, but I'm close.

[sgtsdaughter]

In the grand tradition of this contest . . . I have a deadline, and I need something to keep me occupied. So . . . Where are those last entries?

:D

[BlueTexas]

In the grand tradition of this contest . . . I have a deadline, and I need something to keep me occupied. So . . . Where are those last entries?

:D

Well, I added my entry for your deadline-avoidance perusal. Wish me luck!

[sgtsdaughter]

i did . . . see the pm, and not to mention the rep point i sent an hour or so ago to harass you. i'm turning evil, i know.

[firehorse]

I've never had so much trouble finding an appropriate ending to a piece. I really wanted to post my entry tonight. <sigh>

[sgtsdaughter]

Post!!! I have deadlines coming out the arse, am blocked like you wouldn't believe, and need an escape from the blunderous trappings of my self-imposed dementia.

But, no pressure . . . ;)

[Birol]

:roll: Looks like Truman and William are all that remain to post. They have what, about 15 hours left?

[DJP]

:Guitar: Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday dear

Rhush, Happy Birthday to you!!:Cake:

[brinkett]

Gads, great entries this week. :) Usually there's a clear front runner for me, but this week it'll be hard to choose, and I haven't seen two entries yet.

(Happy Birthday, Rhush!)

[William Haskins]

happy birthday rhush.

[mommie4a]

Cheers Rhush! http://www.smileys.ws/sm/grinning/00000031.gif

[firehorse]

Happy Birthday! :TheWave:

[BlueTexas]

Happy Birthday, Rhush.

Are we really just waiting on the guys again? I thought we had one more...

[Birol]

There's been six posts made to this week's entry thread. That would mean Jenna's original post + 5 Idolers have posted their entries. And there's 7 finalists remaining, correct?

[BlueTexas]

I just counted. 7 finalists left. I thought there were eight for some reason.

[mommie4a]

Don't look now, but Zach and William are in the house. Unlike last week when I stayed up until they posted, I have some entertaining to do, boys. I hope you post before I depart.

[rhymegirl]

There are 7 finalists. Three of us were booted off the island. But we're still staying afloat.

[astonwest]

I thought there were originally 11 finalists (although it was the top ten)...
oh, yes, except one person didn't post an entry the first week...I think...

[sgtsdaughter]

Okay, now they are just toying with us . . . the boys need to post. As with last night, I need something to keep me occupied. :tongue

[maestrowork]

One and a half hour to go. They still have time.

;)

[Birol]

Zack's is up. William, you can post any time now and have the "coveted" last posting spot.

[brokenfingers]

I already voted.

[Cassie88]

You did not!

DUH, Cass.

[BlueTexas]

I thought there were originally 11 finalists (although it was the top ten)...
oh, yes, except one person didn't post an entry the first week...I think...

Right you are...the first week Bass was disqualified and Hapsburg was eliminated, leaving us with nine.

[maestrowork]

I think William is either the world's greatest tease, or he's cutting really close...

OK, he's online... I think he's just waiting for the right moment.

[BlueTexas]

William..you have three minutes!! Are you insane?

[brokenfingers]

Part of winning a contest is showmanship ;)

[Rhush]

Thanks for all the birthday wishes guys! Its my big 30! Sorry I didnt respond earlier, but I just got in from my b-day action.

[William Haskins]

hi everybody. how's tricks?

[brokenfingers]

Rhush - HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

Haskins - you rascal, you!

[BlueTexas]

If showmanship is key, then William will win, hands down :)

[William Haskins]

it had nothing to do with showmanship, i assure you.

[brokenfingers]

Wow, I've just finished reading all the contestant's stories and I think this is the best batch yet!

I saw some serious good work in there and I think all the contestants have ramped it up a quite a bit.

Bravo Idolistas, Bravo!!!

[brokenfingers]

P.S. Due to the exceptional quality of this week's entries, I'm afraid my asking price has gone up. Sorry.

[BlueTexas]

P.S. Due to the exceptional quality of this week's entries, I'm afraid my asking price has gone up. Sorry.

I've got popcorn, bourbon and ferrets. Will that do?

[sgtsdaughter]

shameless you are . . . shameless.

but if i could be bribed my price would be considerably higher this week too. good reads, and great distractions from my work. maybe i should get back to that stuff . . .

[brokenfingers]

I've got popcorn, bourbon and ferrets. Will that do?

Mmmmmmmm..... bourbon........

[maestrowork]

I will take bodies or souls.

[jdkiggins]

Hey, Rhush, sorry I'm a bit late, but Happy Birthday!

[JennaGlatzer]

Yeah! Happy 30th, Rhush!

William, quit making me nervous. What if your computer froze up at the last minute? I always picture you sitting there and giggling, purposely making us bite our nails in anticipation to see if you'll get your entry in on time.

[astonwest]

One day, the server's going to go down at the last minute... :)

[rhymegirl]

Wow, I've read all the stories and they're really good. Don't know how I'm going to choose just one. This is going to be very difficult.

[skylarburris]

Very, very difficult this week. I ultimately chose the one that I could best relate to, that reminded me most of my own childhood...that was the deciding factor, since the writing qas equally good among my four "finalists."

[BlueTexas]

I saw some non-fic in the entries...good for them for branching into new idol territory!!

[Rhush]

Thanks JDK and Jenna.

[William Haskins]

hey, i said happy birthday, too. what am i, chopped liver?

you better be glad i can't go back in time and wish you a miserable birthday, because i would, you know...

[firehorse]

I'm impressed with (and intimidated by) all the entries this week. It's amazing how, despite the age differences, the emotional core of seventh grade remains timeless. Good luck to everyone.

[maestrowork]

Simon-Ray said he'd have some axe to grind later...

[firehorse]

Simon-Ray said he'd have some axe to grind later...Simon-Ray had better get his grammar together first ;)

[William Haskins]

Simon-Ray said he'd have some axe to grind later...

your threat is beginning to ring hollow. every week with the "oooo, simon's coming, better watch out... prepare to be skewered..."

you're running out of weeks, tough guy.

[maestrowork]

Seems like people already loathe Simon-Ray... it's a good sign.

[Cassie88]

I've haven't had a problem choosing, until this week......Now I gotta go read some of them - one more time!

[firehorse]

Seems like people already loathe Simon-Ray... it's a good sign.Not loathe - speaking for myself - but... well, snarky is as snarky does. :tongue

[firehorse]

I think I've just become Forrest Gumption.

[Ella]

I also think this week's work is some of the best I've seen. Way to turn it up a notch!

[bkrrh85]

I just finished reading all the entries, and as a whole was disappointed. Here's why:

First, I found the language of a couple too coarse.

Second, several entries never bothered to give their protagonist's a name, just "I."

Third, cliches abounded.

Fourth, too much narrative and too little dialogue.

Fifth, only one or two sounded like a 7th grader was talking.

Perhaps it was just one of those weeks, as happens on the American Idol show, where the writer's were a little tired, or just didn't hit their stride. Whatever, I hope I see a return to some of the excellent writing we've read in the past.

[trumancoyote]

Were all of them necessarily present stories, or people being retrospective?

That could account for the more non-7th-grade voices out there.

Also, by 'coarse,' did you mean vulgar? If so, what's wrong w/ a bit of vulgarity? :)

[firehorse]

One of the interesting aspects of this assignment is that seventh graders vary enormously in their maturity, their ability to articulate, etc. Even chronological age within that range often has little to do with insightfulness. Of those who were purporting to write from a seventh-grade voice, rather than looking back on the experience, I didn't have trouble believing any.

On the name front (FWIW), I deleted my name; a reader told me it was too jarring to realize - in the middle of the piece - that mine is a true story.

Just my 1.62 cents (exchange rate and all)

[William Haskins]

i'm just glad the notion of disappointment made its way back to the scene. i was afraid last week was an anomaly.

[bkrrh85]

Personally, I found that in a couple of the entires, it like I was reading porn.

By coarse, I meant crude and unrefined in taste and yes, even obscene (Mr. Webster's definition, but found it fit what I thought); the subject matter wasn't something I've encountered when dealing with 7th grade kids. These entries were all obviously from adult voices, and from adult perspectives, and I found that disappointing.

I was hoping to find some fine children's writing and didn't.

[trumancoyote]

Huh.

Mine was nonfiction; I thought like that as a 7th grader.

Guess that makes me ****ed up :)

[William Haskins]

please note that in the criteria jenna listed, one of the options was "a first-person story about you in the 7th grade", which is—by definition— retrospective, a childhood memory cast through the prism of an adult's recollection.

http://absolutewrite.com/forums/showpost.php?p=189034&postcount=1

[bkrrh85]

Firehorse--

YOu said,

[QUOTE=firehorse]One of the interesting aspects of this assignment is that seventh graders vary enormously in their maturity, their ability to articulate, etc. Even chronological age within that range often has little to do with insightfulness. Of those who were purporting to write from a seventh-grade voice, rather than looking back on the experience, I didn't have trouble believing any.

My youngest daughter is finishing 8th grade, and she is much more mature than most of the kids her age; however, she would NEVER write something as coarse as some of these entries, and I seriously doubt any of the 7th graders I know would either.

I have judged several children's writing contests, and let me assure you that this weeks entries were very adult, and very unchildlike that were posted this week. No serious children's writer (that I know, I'm sure there are exceptions . . . there are always exceptions) would believe these entries were written for or by children (with one notable exception).

And, exchange rate and all, that's my $.02 worth!!

[bkrrh85]

Good point, Mr. Haskins. Glad you reminded me of this.

[mommie4a]

I'm confused - yet again I might add. Bkrrh85 - were you expecting to read only stories intended for Cricket or Spider or something? I don't think most of us who submitted to either the JFF thread or the finalists thread read it that way, though a few lean in that direction. Perhaps Jenna's instructions were clearer to the writers than they were (as setting up expectations) for the reader?

[William Haskins]

i hadn't thought of it this way, and never anticipated any confusion about it. to me, if jenna wanted children's (or YA or whatever) stories, i would've expected that audience to be defined in the assignment for the week.

[MacAllister]

Bkrrh85 said:...this weeks entries were very adult, and very unchildlike that were posted this week. No serious children's writer (that I know, I'm sure there are exceptions . . . there are always exceptions) would believe these entries were written for or by children (with one notable exception).


Hmm--I think your take on this week's theme is a bit eccentric, Bkrrh85.

Jenna's directive read as follows:The 7th grade.

This can be a first-person story about you in the 7th grade, an article about 7th graders, a short story starring a 7th grader, etc.

Word count: No more than 1000 words. NOWHERE in that assignment does she suggest that these entries ought to read as if "written for or by children."

Frankly, you sound rather miffed and snarky, and I just don't think there is any call for that.

[firehorse]

I was hoping to find some fine children's writing and didn't.Ah, but as somebody else pointed out, that wasn't the assignment.

[bkrrh85]

Sorry, didn't mean to sound either "miffed or snarky" (not sure what that last means!).
I was in a hurry when I went to the entries, and as all of you folks were so kind to point out, I obviously misunderstood Jenna's instructions.

Either way, I was hoping to find some children's entries, and so when I didn't, I was disappointed.

BUT, I do stand by my original statement in that I think there was way too much narrative which could have been broken up by some more dialogue.

AND, one final word--I'm really glad it's you guys posting these stories, because I suck at writing short stuff, so kudos to all of you!

(hope that alleves an unintentional snarkiness)

[JennaGlatzer]

True. I can see how it would be jarring if that's what you expected, but that's not what the assignment asked for. 7th grade was just a story element, to be used for any audience and from any perspective.

[MacAllister]

Your gracious explanation is completely accepted, and I happily withdraw the "snarky" comment. :)

[bkrrh85]

Whew! Glad I got that straightened out. Thanks to all for helping me see where I erred.

[William Haskins]

i love it when everyone's happy.

[trumancoyote]

I'm not happy, William.

[William Haskins]

that's okay, because i lied when i said i loved that.

[trumancoyote]

I was hoping so, but I never know with you.

[William Haskins]

and you never shall.

[trumancoyote]

*****.

[maestrowork]

get a room, lovas.

[BlueTexas]

i hadn't thought of it this way, and never anticipated any confusion about it. to me, if jenna wanted children's (or YA or whatever) stories, i would've expected that audience to be defined in the assignment for the week.

Yeah, what he said. I was writing retrospectively; I thought that was pretty clear. Oh well. I also didn't read the assignment to be YA in nature.

[astonwest]

BUT, I do stand by my original statement in that I think there was way too much narrative which could have been broken up by some more dialogue.

I have to agree with this one...for many of the entries this week...
Although to be contradictory, the entry I voted for was mostly narrative...so what do I know?

[trumancoyote]

What's wrong w/ narration? I think it's a shame that most modern writing classes emphasize scene! action! dialogue! every page!

This isn't television; it's literature.

[astonwest]

What's wrong w/ narration? I think it's a shame that most modern writing classes emphasize scene! action! dialogue! every page!

This isn't television; it's literature.
Nothing inherently wrong with narration...as long as it doesn't drag down...

[bkrrh85]

I agree, nothing inherently wrong with narration, but when I was reading this weeks entries, I found myself skimming lengthy narrative, and thought that perhaps if the narratives were mixed up with a bit of other "tools" it would keep my interest longer.

[William Haskins]

words are interesting, even when they're not in quotes. after all, narration is just dialogue internalized.

[Mr Underhill]

What's wrong w/ narration? I think it's a shame that most modern writing classes emphasize scene! action! dialogue! every page!

This isn't television; it's literature.
I tend to agree, though the conventional wisdom says that the modern reader has been conditioned by a century of motion pictures and television to demand fast-paced action and scene jumping and showing not telling. And sometimes it is true that this method does keep the narrative snappy and readers (especially American readers with their world-renowned short attention spans) engaged.

Yet, I think there is some movement back in the opposite direction. After all, storytelling is a very primal human activity. Telling a story instead of just showing it is a strength that text narratives have that is different from a movie storyboard, for instance. And perhaps there are people who are so frazzled from information overload and the kind of ADHD-inducing jump-cutting seen all over the visual story media that they want to sit back and let someone spin a yarn for them.

As evidence for this potential trend, I would present the success of certain books that have been popular on the coffee-klatsch book group circuit: The Known World by Edward Jones and Gilead by Marilynne Robinson. In both the narrative tells stories and relates thoughts that do not translate directly to the visual. Instead they travel back and forth over time and space connecting events and memories through meaning and character. While both of these are clearly in a category above mainstream pop fiction, I wouldn't say they are truly in the lit-fict category either. And they have had decent commercial success. Susannah Clarke's Jonathan Strange and Mister Norrell might be another example: she deliberately emulates a novel contemporary to its setting in early nineteenth-century England, something that probably would have ensured abject obscurity ten or twenty years ago.

Of course these three works are tremendously well-written. And I'm not sure it would be a wise move to take this route to get one's first novel published. Still, one should play to one's strengths I suppose.

[firehorse]

Gilead by Marilynne RobinsonIsn't this written in the form of a series of letters? I'd consider that dialogue, though I guess it's a gray area.

Can't wait to read it, though. Housekeeping is one of my all-time favourites, both in terms of content and writing (specifically her use of metaphors and her poetic imagery).

[Mr Underhill]

Isn't this written in the form of a series of letters? I'd consider that dialogue, though I guess it's a gray area.
It is written ostensibly as a long letter from a dying preacher to his seven year-old son. But it is not formatted as a letter, nor does it involve back-and-forth similar to dialogue.

There are novels written as a series of letters back and forth between two or more characters, and these are known as epistolary novels. That is another literary form that is currently moribund, but was common in the 19th century. A recent example would be Freedom and Necessity by Steven Brust and Emma Bull. A very good book, and it used the same conceit as JS&MN in terms of adopting a 19th century style, but I don't know that it was particularly successful.

[maestrowork]

Narration in a 1st person story is like dialogue -- the narrator is telling you his/her story. The "letter" stories are basically 1st person narrative. A great storyteller/narrator can put you in that dream state...

Now for a 3rd person piece, it would be more difficult to put the readers in the dream state with tons and tons of narration -- all telling and no showing. It also gets boring really fast.

[BlueTexas]

Voting ends in 6 minutes...where is everyone?

[sgtsdaughter]

so where's william's infamous thread . . . did he give up on the dirty little pranks this week?:ROFL:

[trumancoyote]

Well, he'd have to wait a few minutes -- otherwise it'd be unrealistic.

It's too expected now, though, so I don't think he'll do it :)

[sgtsdaughter]

yeah, but now it's tradition.

yes, i have a wry sense of humor.

[trumancoyote]

Don't get me wrong: I hope he does. It's hilarious.

It's like in Family Guy, when they have a running joke and take it a bit too far --repeat it too many times-- so it's not funny. Then do it once or twice more, so it's so ridiculous it is funny.

[BlueTexas]

It would have to be in the wee hours of the night, since that's when the results are usually posted.

[Unique]

:Hammer: What? wee hours of the night !?! Say it's not so!

[Birol]

Until recently our vote counter has worked the midnight shift (in one of the US's time zones). Also, Jenna is naturally a night owl.

[BlueTexas]

She's in the Pacific time zone, three hours behind EST. It's not even 10PM there yet.